Not the Way We Planned It
by SupernaturalMondler
Summary: What if Chandler and Monica's relationship had had one more challenge at the beginning? Still exploring their new romance, they're now faced with impending parenthood. Set during S5, just before TOW Everyone Finds Out, everything before that is the same except that Joey and Rachel still don't know either. *changed to M rating for some mild sexual content in later chapters*
1. Intro

She gripped tightly to the edge of the sink as the world spun around her. A million thoughts rushed through her head. How could this happen? They had been so careful! And _oh god_ what was she going to tell Chandler? She blinked hard, and again, hoping that by some miracle her vision was deceiving her, that she read the tests—all three of them—wrong. Nothing changed. Each test boldly displayed two pink lines, taunting her from their place next to the sink.

 _Pregnant._

It had started about a week ago, when her period should have started. She'd never been a day late in her life, so she was immediately on alert. Realistically, she _knew_ there was only one thing it could be, _knew_ that she hadn't miscounted that month, or that it would start tomorrow. After a few days of denial—during which she avoided Chandler whenever she could—she finally caved and bought the pregnancy tests on her way home from work.

Oh god, she was pregnant. This wasn't how it was supposed to go! They had barely been together five months, but it had been going so well! So well, in fact, that they had even discussed the possibility of telling the others about them. Well, looks like that's happening one way or another. No way will she be able to hide a pregnancy for very long; they spent so much time with their noses in each other's business and she was already beginning to feel sick, someone would catch on.

And _Chandler_ , how could she possibly tell Chandler she was pregnant? He would absolutely freak! Hell, they were moving their relationship at a snail's pace as it was and he still panicked at every new development. There's no way he's ready or willing to commit to a baby of all things.

At no point since she read the tests did she ever even consider giving up the baby. Of course she wasn't ready to have a baby yet, and whenever she pictured herself becoming a mother it was nothing like this, but this was her child, and though she'd known about it for only minutes, she knew she was going to go through with this, whatever it took.

Which brought her back to Chandler. Obviously he would break up with her as soon as she told him, and she couldn't even fault him for that. He hadn't asked for this. Granted neither had she, but at the very least she had always wanted babies someday. Chandler, well, he had never in all the years she'd known him given any indication whatsoever that he wanted kids, ever. Sure, he was great with Ben, bus incident aside, but a couple hours was nothing compared to the responsibility of a lifetime.

She wouldn't force him into anything. It wouldn't be fair to him to keep him tied don just because she wants to keep the baby. She would tell him, he would freak out, things would be awkward for a while, and hopefully they would forget that he had any part in it. Maybe they wouldn't even need to tell their friends that it was his, maybe she could pretend she didn't know the father? They would have no reason to believe otherwise, anyways.

She did have to tell Chandler though. And that was one conversation she was _not_ looking forward to.


	2. Chapter 1

"Monica?" Chandler knocked on the bedroom door. They hadn't been alone together in days, which was unusual even before they started dating, and now especially so. Rachel was out with Phoebe at a movie that would be over for another hour and a half at least, and he wanted to use the opportunity to at least talk to her, to make sure she's okay. With each moment that passed before she opened the door, Chandler's insecurities—always present, but only in the back of his mind for the past few months—came roaring back. Had he done something wrong? Was she avoiding him on purpose? Was this her way of ending things with him without having to see him? Were they not as serious as he thought?

Before that train of thought could go too far, Monica's bedroom door creaked open just a touch, and she poked her head out. She looked absolutely exhausted, he could tell, like she hadn't slept in days and Chandler wasn't sure if he should be relieved that she didn't sleep well without him, either, or worried that something was seriously wrong.

Before he could say anything, Monica pushed the door open further, just enough for her to slip into the living room. She took his hand gently and led him to the couch.

"Chandler," she said. "There's something I need to tell you."

"What's going on?" he asked, taking both her hands in his. "Mon? Are you okay?"

She was quiet for what felt like eternity, and Chandler didn't know if he should speak up again, remind her that he was there. She seemed in a trance, and Chandler no longer worried that she was breaking things off, not when she was acting so… _wrong_. No, this was different. Harder.

Finally, after what was probably only a minute but seemed like an hour, she mumbled something quietly, that he couldn't pick up.

"What?" he asked

She looked up, blue eyes holding his steadily, even as he could feel her hands shaking in his own, and articulated the words Chandler hoped never to have to hear.

"I'm pregnant."

Chandler froze. How could she…how did they…but…they always…how, how is that possible? It took him a moment to realize that he had voiced his stuttering thoughts out loud, and that Monica was looking at him worriedly, like she expect him to combust at any moment. Which, to be perfectly honest, didn't seem impossible at the moment.

"How?" he finally settled on, well aware that his hands were starting to sweat, and that she could most likely feel it. He could hardly be embarrassed though, because at that point all he could feel was total, complete _panic_.

"These things happen Chandler," she said simply and _no_ they _don't_ just happen! They were so careful, they used condoms and everything!

"Are…are you sure?"

"I'm sure," she responded firmly. "I checked three times."

"Okay…okay," now he was definitely having trouble breathing _oh god_ this can't be happening. "And you're…I mean, are you gonna…?" He knew the answer before he even asked, of course she was gonna keep it, this was _Monica_.

"Yes," she answered. "I have to Chandler, you know I do. But this isn't on you. I mean, you can be as involved as you want, we can forget this ever happened, just…however you want to do this, it's your choice."

"Okay…okay," he repeated again. His felt like he was underwater, like he could pass out at any moment, and all he knew was that he needed to get out of there _now_. With nothing more than a mumbled "excuse me", he was up and out of the apartment, racing down the stairs and outside, no destination in mind. He just needed to be anywhere but _there_ , somewhere that he could think about something other than the baby, _his baby_ , that was currently growing inside of the woman he cared for more than anything in the world. Nothing about this was fair, nothing about this was easy, and Chandler, who was pretty poor at dealing with his emotions on a good day, had no idea how to even begin to process this.

So he just walked.

* * *

He didn't know how long he wandered for, just that now it's dark, he's tired, and he's no closer to coming to terms with Monica's bombshell.

If he was completely honest, he was still so hung up on _how, how is this possible_ that he hadn't spent too much time actually trying to process what that meant. But now that he was back in his apartment—thankfully alone, even his roommate would notice something was wrong and there was no way he could explain any of this to Joey—all he could think about was _what now?_ Monica hadn't pressured him, and he knew he could just walk away now and she would hold no resentment towards him. But how could he do that to her? Above all, she was his best friend, she deserved someone who would be there for her, could be there for her. He wasn't that person. He had so many problems of his own he was honestly surprised he even managed to exist some days, he couldn't be expected to be any sort of role model for another human. The baby deserved better, Monica deserved better.

Still, didn't he have a responsibility to her? After all, he brought the sperm, it's just as much his fault as anyone's. Shouldn't he be there, just because it's the right thing to do? Did Monica even want him around for this? Was that actually her way of telling him to leave her alone?

This was just great. For the first time in his life, he was in a serious relationship, one that he saw actually going somewhere, and he had to go and screw it all up by getting her pregnant (which, again, brings him back to _how?_ ). He cared about her so, _so_ much, maybe even loved her, and he didn't know what he would do if he lost her.

But a _baby_? That was huge. Too huge. Too big and scary and so _not_ something he was ready for. At all.

He went back and forth in his head like this for what felt like forever until he finally drifted off as the sun started to come up. He slept restlessly for only a few hours before finally getting up to face the day when he determined that he would never be able to fall back asleep with how much was still on his mind. Another walk maybe? It certainly beat sitting in his room all day, running the risk that one of the others would barge in and ask what was wrong.

It was colder today than it had been the day before, and Chandler wished he had thought to grab gloves on his way out, but he didn't want to risk going back and running into someone, so he stuck his hands deeper in his pockets and sped up his pace to keep warm. Once again he had no destination in mind, was just walking to avoid being back at home, with the questions from his friends and Monica right across the hall and the pressure of figuring out _what the hell he was supposed to do_.

He walked for a while, breathing in the late winter air and letting it cleanse him, at least temporarily, of his stress. When he no longer felt like he was suffocating, an improvement from the previous afternoon, he slowed down a bit, started to take the time to look at his surroundings.

He really didn't spend enough time just wandering around the city, he realized, taking in the rush of the mid-afternoon. Business people on their way home (which reminded him, he still needed to call in sick for the day), old ladies getting groceries, students getting a bite to eat after class, parents with strollers enjoying the day.

It was the last one that made him pause. He had never really taken notice of families before, other than to walk around them in his rush to get places. Just looking around him now, he could see all different types of families—one parent, two parents, old, young, parents with babies, parents with toddlers, parents with teenagers. They all looked so happy, didn't they? Had they struggled at first? Did they ever doubt themselves? He imagined that they had, but looking around himself now, he couldn't tell. All he could see were parents who loved their children. If they could do it, maybe he could too?

He suddenly imagined himself with a baby—something he had never done before in his life. Just like that, he knew what he needed to do. He was still terrified, that would never change, but underneath the panic he could feel a hint of…excitement? He turned around and headed back in the direction of his building, miles away by now. He took his time, allowed his mind to wander a bit more, but this time instead of sending his mind reeling, it put the biggest smile on his face, at the thought of loving something that much. And to experience that with Monica? He could hardly remember why he had run to begin with.

* * *

Monica was sitting on the couch watching TV when Chandler rushed in. He didn't seem to see her at first, running straight past her and towards her bedroom before skidding to a stop and turning around. She hadn't seen him in almost two days, since she told him about the baby, and honestly part of her had expected to never see him again.

"I need to talk to you," he panted, sitting down on the coffee table in front of her. Just then she noticed the plastic shopping bag in his hand. He reached inside and pulled out a white piece of fabric and handed it to her.

"Chandler?" She questioned, spreading the cloth on her lap. It was a tiny baby onesie, with "I 3 NY" printed in block letters on the front, like you would find at one of those dumb souvenir shops in the more touristy areas.

"I'm sorry I freaked out the other day," he began, folding his hands around hers. "I just…I wasn't expecting that, I guess. I still don't understand how this even happened…"

"You don't have to—"

"Let me finish," he interrupted her. "I…this was never something I thought about before, and I just felt so out of my depth. Still, that's no excuse for me just running out like that." He paused, and his gaze met hers dead on. She could see the seriousness of the situation reflected in his eyes, but the panic that had been there the other day was almost entirely absent. "I want to do this. Monica, these last few months have been the best months of my life, and I can't imagine giving this up. So if you're going have this baby, I want to be there the whole way. All of it. That's…" he swallowed, and looked down to her still-flat stomach, "that's my kid in there. I can't just ignore that. I don't want to ignore that."

"Chandler," her voice was shaking as she tried to process what he was saying. Any expectations she had of how this conversation would go flew right out the window, because this just seemed so _unlike_ him. "Are you…are you sure? I don't want you to do anything you don't want to do."

"I want to do this," he assured her. "I want to have this baby with you, and I want to raise it with you. If you want me to?" He looked up at her hopefully, a shy smile on his face, and tears sprung to her eyes.

"Yes, yes, let's do this then," she agreed, and flung her arms around his neck as he wrapped his around her waist, holding her close.

"I love you so much," he murmured against the top of her head, and she smiled into his neck, breath catching at the words, ones he'd never said to her before.

"I love you too, Chandler," she replied just as softly.

They were quiet for a moment longer, before Chandler pulled back with a kiss to her forehead.

"So what now?" he asked.

"What do you mean?"

"What does this mean for, you know, us?" he asked. "Like, should we move in together? Get married? What do we tell the others? Or our parents? Or…"

"Chandler, slow down!" Monica interrupted with a laugh. "It doesn't have to be a big thing!"

"But it is a big thing! It's a huge thing!" Chandler exclaimed.

"It doesn't have to change anything," Monica said seriously. "I like where we are, there's no reason to rush things just because of this. It'll be like…we have two different relationships."

"Two different relationships?" Chandler repeated.

"Yeah, you know, like, there'll be us, as boyfriend and girlfriend, and we can just keep going the same way we have been. And then there'll be the us that's having this baby," she explained, talking quickly. She was fidgeting with her hands, something that when paired with the way she was rambling really let on to just how nervous about this she was. "We can go to all the doctor's appointments and talk about names and feel it kicking! If, y'know, you want all that?"

"Honey, of course I want all that," Chandler smiled. He rearranged them so that she was sitting on his lap and wrapped his arms around her, resting his hands on her stomach. "I told you, I want all of it. I'm in this one hundred percent, as much as you want me around. And more." He kissed her cheek as she giggled and turned to catch his lips.

"I want that too," she grinned.

Chandler smiled back—her favorite smile that reached all the way to his eyes—and kissed her again. She leaned back against his chest and they just sat there for a while, not saying a word, as Chandler stroked small circles over her stomach, where there would be a bump in just a few short weeks. She still could barely take it in—she was _pregnant_ , she was having a _baby_. And somehow Chandler, who just yesterday had been so freaked that she worried she'd never see him again, was still right there. And he seemed so genuinely excited about this, that Monica couldn't help but be excited too.

She looked down at the little onesie still spread over her lap and smiled. Yeah, they were gonna be okay.

 **Thoughts? I have most of this story planned out, I just need to write it now! Let me know what you think, reviews will definitely motivate me to write faster!**


	3. Chapter 2

**Fair warning: the amount of sap in this chapter is honestly a bit concerning...they're just so cute I can't help it okay?! Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed the first chapter (clearly it did motivate me to write more...I wrote 4k for this chapter in less than 24 hours, which is more than I've written in the past year combined) please keep them coming!**

"Chandler! Eyes up here!" Monica snapped, and Chandler whipped his eyes back up to her face with a bashful grin. They were sitting in the examination room, waiting for the doctor to come in for the first ultrasound. It was still fairly early on in the pregnancy—about six weeks, by their estimate—but Doctor McKay had suggested that they take a look, which was why Monica was sitting on a doctor's bed half-covered by a paper sheet with her legs spread and Chandler was trying desperately _not_ to look down…there.

"Chandler!" she snapped again, slapping him on the arm this time and wow he hadn't event noticed that his eyes had wandered again. So sue him, he wanted to look at his girlfriend.

"Sorry," he shrugged, leaning against the bed near her shoulder.

"I'm surprised you're not pacing or something," she commented when he looked at her. "Isn't this scary, being here?"

"No more so than anything else these past few weeks," he responded, taking one of her hands casually. Truthfully, it was pretty intimidating being here; he knew seeing the sonogram would make it real. Maybe he had gotten all the panic out of his system in the first 48 hours, though, because while he might be a bit anxious, it was the good kind of anxious, the excited kind. "Don't worry, though. I'm sure these next few months will bring many more Chandler-esque freak outs."

As weak an attempt at humor as that was—especially for him—it got Monica to smile which was the whole point. Monica had been tense all week, ever since they had made the appointment, and it was a bit unsettling to see her so out of sorts. Chandler had known her for almost ten years and never had he seen her so anxious about anything; all he wanted to do was make everything okay for her, in any way he could, to the point where he wasn't even thinking about his own nerves.

It was especially hard trying to comfort her without cluing the other in on what was happening. Hiding their relationship had been a challenge to begin with, but the added pressure of Monica's pregnancy added a whole new layer that Chandler really wasn't sure how to navigate.

"I love you," Monica grinned, and Chandler leaned down to kiss her forehead. He had lost count of how many times they had said those words in the past week, but he never tired of hearing it or saying it.

"I love you too," he replied. "Are you okay?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" she asked, eyes turned down to their intertwined hands.

"Lots is happening," he commented. He brought his other hand to her cheek, meeting her eyes again. "It's okay to be a little scared."

"Pshh," she rolled her eyes, faking casual. A good attempt, but still Chandler could see right through her. "Who's scared? 'Cause I'm not scared. I'm perfectly fine!"

"Of course you are," he chuckled, and kissed her forehead again as Dr. McKay returned to pull up the ultrasound on the screen.

"Everything looks good so far," she commented, turning the blurry screen towards them. "And that—right there—is your baby."

Chandler squinted, trying and failing to see anything but black and white squiggles. He felt Monica squeeze his hand and exhale shakily. "Oh my god," she breathed.

"I don't see it," Chandler whispered back.

"It's right…there," Monica pointed with the hand that was still holding his. He could vaguely see a shape amidst the wavy lines, and he guessed that that must be all there is to see.

"There's not much to see yet," Dr. McKay assured them. "It's still early. Give it a few weeks, and you'll have no problems. I assume you want a copy of the sonogram?"

"Yes," they answered at the same time, and Chandler tore his eyes away from the screen to smile at her. The tension he had observed in her all week had almost completely melted away, and the smile on her face at last reached her eyes. He wrapped an arm around her shoulder and pressed his face to the top of her head to hide his own grin. Never in his life could he remember being so happy.

"I'll get that printed for you, then," Dr. McKay said. "Do you have any other questions for me at this point?"

"I can't think of any," Monica responded, looking to Chandler for confirmation. He just shrugged and shook his head. They both knew that she was the brains behind the whole operation; as a general rule he was just there for moral support.

"Then, Ms. Geller, you can go ahead and get dressed again, and you can pick up the sonogram at the receptionist desk on your way out. Congratulations again to both of you!"

"Thank you," Chandler responded for the two of them as the doctor closed the door behind herself.

Monica moved from under Chandler's arm and swung her legs over the side of the bed.

"Can you like…not look, or something?" she asked.

"Honey, I hate to break it to you, but I've kind of seen it all," he joked, flinching back when she turned to glare at him. "Fine, fine, I'm turning around, take your time."

"Do you ever stop talking?" he couldn't see her face—because he was a gentleman dammit and when his girlfriend says not to look, he doesn't look, no matter how badly he wants to—but he knew she was smiling.

"Mon, in all the years you've known me, have I ever stopped talking?" he responded.

"Good point," she admitted. "Okay, you're good to turn around now."

He did so, and immediately pulled her into his arms and held her close for a moment.

"What was that for?" she asked when they pulled apart.

"We're having a baby," he replied, stupid grin still on his face.

"You bet we are," she agreed, kissing his cheek before moving away from him entirely and grabbing her purse. "You ready?"

"Let's go," he responded, and followed her out to the receptionist area to pick up the sonogram.

* * *

Rachel wasn't home when they got back to Monica's apartment, and wasn't supposed to be home for another three hours, so the two of them curled up on the couch together, the picture of the sonogram between them. They were quiet for a while, just looking at the piece of paper, so simple, yet the most important thing in the world at the moment. That was their baby. Once Monica had pointed it out, Chandler couldn't un-see it. It was small, it was barely anything, yet he loved it. He loved it so much and he didn't know anything about it, other than it existed. That was enough.

"Wow," he breathed, for what felt like the millionth time that day.

"I know!" Monica agreed enthusiastically.

"That's…that's a little person." He could feel Monica's gaze turn to him, but now it was his turn to keep his eyes glued to the tiny blip in front of them. "That's our little person."

"Are you okay?" she asked earnestly.

"I've never been so okay in all my life," he responded seriously, and turned away from the photo to kiss the side of her head. "Are _you_ okay?"

"Very okay," she nodded. She looked back at the picture for a moment, before putting it on the coffee table and turning her body to face him entirely. "You know," she began, "there are still a lot of things we need to talk about. And soon."

"Like what?" he asked, turning his body towards hers and reaching out for her hands.

"Well, it won't be long before it becomes _very_ obvious that I'm pregnant. And Rachel's around so much that she'll figure out something's up even before I start showing. I think it's best if we tell them up front, instead of them finding out on their own."

"I agree," Chandler nodded, the paused. "Good god, Ross is gonna kill me isn't he?"

"Ross isn't gonna kill you," Monica argued.

"He is though!" Chandler groaned. "I slept with his sister, didn't tell anyone, then I got his sister pregnant. He's going to absolutely kill me, and I will totally deserve it."

"Hey, hey, _Chandler_ ," she stopped him, pulling his hands to her chest. "He's not going to do anything, because I won't let him. I'm an adult, I can make my own decisions, okay?" She moved a hand to his cheek, which he covered with one of his own. "I love you, and I want to have this baby with you. And there is _nothing_ that Ross or anyone else can do that's going to change that."

"Really?" he smiled shyly.

"Really," she confirmed. He turned his head to kiss her palm, then pulled her onto his lap to kiss her lips.

"So how are we gonna tell everyone then?" he asked, forehead still pressed against hers.

"Well, I guess we can wait a little while longer?" she grinned sheepishly. "I mean, we can tell them now, or we can wait a few weeks, y'know, until we have to? I kind of like having you to myself."

"Aww, I like having you to myself, too," he admitted. "Doing this without everyone else getting in the way? Best decision we ever made. Shame it can't last forever."

"But it can last a little longer?" she asked hopefully, and Chandler smiled back and kissed her again—he'd never get tired of kissing her.

"Yeah," he answered. "Just a little longer."

* * *

Monica flushed the toilet and stood up to wash her mouth out for the second time already that day. Morning sickness was a bitch. It had started a few days ago, at the beginning of her seventh week, and since then she had thrown up more than she had in the past ten years combined. If Rachel had noticed, she hadn't said anything yet, and Monica really, _really_ hoped she hadn't noticed. She was tired, she was sore _everywhere_ , and she now spent about an hour a day hugging the toilet. She just didn't have the energy to deal with the drama that would inevitable come when the other four got involved.

Chandler, in the meantime, had been a saint. The time they spent together was unfortunately limited, as it was becoming difficult to come up with excused to break away from the others, but the precious moments they did manage to steal were filled with cuddles and quiet talks, encouragement that she was doing _so well_ and assurances that everything was going to be okay. Mood swings were also a bitch.

"Mon? You okay?" and _there_ was Rachel, honestly Monica was surprised it took her this long to notice.

"I'm fine!" she called back. "Just a minute!" She splashed water on her face, trying to control the flush, while also trying to not puke again. It was a constant battle.

She opened the door and Rachel was standing right there, concern written all over her face. "Honey are you sure you're okay?" she asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine!" Monica responded as convincingly as she could. "Promise.

"Monica?" she pressed. "You would tell me if something was wrong, wouldn't you?"

"Of course I would!" Monica exclaimed, turning towards the kitchen. "Hungry? Want me to make you something for breakfast?" _Please don't throw up please don't throw up_.

"No, I have to head off to work, I just want to make sure you're okay."

"Oh, well, I'm okay! I'm perfect!" Monica exclaimed, probably a bit too earnestly. "Bye-bye, have a good day!"

Rachel gave her a look—one that Monica knew meant this wasn't over—before grabbing her coat and slipping out the door. Not a minute later the door opened again to reveal Chandler, all dressed for work in a suit and tie like she loved.

"Hi honey," she greeted him, turning to the fridge to pull out the milk for his cereal.

"Morning babe," he walked up behind her to kiss her cheek. "Feeling any better?"

"Well, I've only thrown up twice today, and it's already 9am, so I'll count that as a win," she said with a shrug.

"I'm sorry you're so miserable," he said, and he did sound genuinely sorry. She stretched up onto her tiptoes to kiss his cheek in answer.

"I'm not miserable," she responded. "I mean, morning sickness is no picnic, but other than that I'm fine. But you should know that I think Rachel is catching on. We may need to think about telling the others soon."

"Oh, yeah, of course," he nodded. "Whenever you're ready, I'm ready. However you want to do it, I'm with you one hundred percent."

"You are such a suck up, but I appreciate it," she teased, and Chandler smiled back, raising his eyebrows to show that he understood the joke.

"Anything for you, dear," he replied with a wink. "I'm off to work. Call me if you need anything?"

"Of course," she rolled her eyes, steering him towards the door. "I'll see you tonight when I get off work."

"Mmm, love you," he grinned, leaning in to kiss her lips.

"Love you too," she responded, meeting him in the middle. "Now go. I'll be fine!"

He grazed his hand over her face one more time before backing out of the door and closing it behind him. Alone for the first time since she woke up, Monica allowed herself to sag against the counter. Truthfully, she had never felt so poorly in her entire life. Doctor McKay had said that this was completely normal, that there was nothing to worry about, so she didn't. That didn't stop her from stewing silently that she wasn't one of the twenty percent of women who didn't experience morning sickness.

She sighed out loud and poured herself a glass of water from the tap before sitting down at the table. If she was being completely honest, she was getting tired of keeping everything from her friends. It would be so much easier if they knew; not only would she not have to hide the pregnancy anymore, but Chandler could be around all the time to help. He was the one thing making all this easier and it was killing her that she couldn't just go to him any time she wanted.

Seven weeks in, it was time, she decided. At the very least she needed to tell Rachel; she needed her best friend in her corner. Maybe Phoebe. They could definitely hold off on telling Ross for a little while. She'd never admit it to Chandler, but she was terrified of telling him too.

She had another hour before she needed to leave for work, so instead of using that time to clean like she normally would, she made her way back into bed for another hour of sleep. It was the least she could do to make herself less miserable.

* * *

Chandler poked his head inside Monica and Rachel's apartment to find it empty. Monica would be home any minute, and he had no idea where Rachel was, or how long until she'd be home. He figured he might as well just wait at theirs, since it wasn't unusual for any member of their gang to show up at any hour at their unofficial home base, so he grabbed the carton of apple juice from the fridge—he had promised Monica that he wouldn't drink for as long as she was pregnant—poured himself a glass, and sat down in front of the TV.

He hadn't even finished his first glass when the door opened again and Monica walked in, seemingly unsurprised to see him there already.

"Hi honey, good day?" she greeted, moving to sit next to him on the couch.

"The best," he exaggerated. "I had lunch with Doug today, and he only had two drinks!"

"Ooh, must be cutting back," she joked along, pausing to press a kiss to his lips before curling into his side and resting her head on his shoulder.

"Mon? You okay?"

"Hmm? Yeah, just tired," she mumbled distractedly. "Doctor said that's normal. Plus, I don't sleep nearly as well with you across the hall."

"I know," he murmured soothingly. "I hate it too. I'd much rather sleep with you."

"I think it's time to tell them," Monica admitted, and Chandler had to agree. Sneaking around was exhausting on a good day, and from what he had heard, so was pregnancy. Putting the two together was just too much, and he really worried about Monica's health.

"Tonight?" he asked. "Or tomorrow?"

"I think…not tonight," she replied. "This weekend maybe? I don't work Saturday, we could tell them then? Or at least just Rachel and Phoebe. If Rachel knows, you can be over here a lot more often."

"That's fine," Chandler agreed. "Whatever's best for you. I don't want you losing any sleep. You need your rest."

She laughed softly. "You worry too much. I'm totally fine, trust me."

"Okay," he agreed. "I trust you. I still worry, but I trust you."

"I love you so much," she responded. "How did I get to be so lucky?"

"Wow, someone's tired," he teased with a smile, causing her to sleepily slap his arm.

"Shut up," she mumbled. "I'm trying to be nice here."

"I know," he chuckled. "I love you too. Want to go lie down?"

She shook her head. "Rachel's gonna be home any minute. This is fine, just stop moving."

Chandler settled back into the couch and pulled her tighter to him as she dozed off. Any one of the others could walk in at any moment—actually Chandler was surprised no one had showed up yet—but he didn't care. It wasn't like they were never this close before, there was no reason to be paranoid. At least, that was what he kept reminding himself while sneaking careful glances over his shoulder and trying not to disturb the beautiful, sleeping woman on his chest.

Come to think of it, he was a little tired himself, and he hadn't been this comfortable in what felt like weeks, or at least since the last time they had gotten a night together. He planned to only close his eyes for a minute, but next thing he knew the apartment door was banging open and Joey strolled in like it was his own place. Monica stirred a bit, blinking sleepily and Chandler had to fight very urge to kiss her right then, audience be damned.

"Hey guys, what're you up to?" he greeted, seemingly unbothered by the position he had just found them in.

"I take it you're here for dinner?" Monica responded instead of answering, untangling herself from Chandler's embrace as she did so. He wanted to argue, to tell her that she didn't have to get up yet, but he didn't have a good enough excuse for why she shouldn't cook dinner for all of them, something she did normally.

"Well, yeah, I mean, if you're offering," Joey answered casually and Monica shook her head.

"Well, I'm not doing anything fancy tonight, it's just gonna be pasta."

"Mon, believe me, pasta is much fancier than anything we have over at our place," Chandler reminded her, standing up and following her to the kitchen. She swatted him on the shoulder when he got close enough, ignoring his protest of "hey!" and pushed him out of the kitchen.

"You. Sit," she commanded, and he obliged, sitting next to Joey at the kitchen table with an eye roll.

"Yes ma'am," he nodded and she winked back. Joey looked between the two of them skeptically but made no comment, nor did he give any indication that he thought anything particularly unusual about the exchange.

"Hey guys!" Rachel greeted as she joined them in the apartment. "Feeling better, Mon?"

"What was wrong with Monica?" Joey asked, looking between the two of them, concern on his face.

"Nothing's wrong, I'm fine," Monica answered as casually as she could, not bothering to turn around from where she was stirring the pasta at the stove. "I was a little sick this morning, but I'm perfectly okay now. I promise," she added before Rachel could argue. She clearly knew all of them too well.

The door opened again to reveal Ross, then Phoebe followed almost immediately after and any chance of being alone with Monica for the rest of the night flew right out the window. She put the big bowl of pasta on the table and the vultures that were their friends during mealtimes swooped in and devoured it with speed that would be concerning if he didn't know them so well. Chandler kept trying to catch Monica's eye across all the usual commotion, but she was sufficiently occupied by the remainder of the group and barely glanced at him for the duration of the meal.

When the group started migrating to the living room to camp in front of the TV, Chandler stood up and began clearing the table.

"You don't have to do that," Monica said, moving to take a plate from him.

"I want to," he responded. "You go sit and relax, let your boyfriend take care of things."

Monica grinned shyly and glanced over to the other four to confirm that they weren't paying attention, then leaned up to kiss his cheek. "You're so sweet. I'll wash and you dry?" she suggested.

"Deal," he grinned, quickly returning the peck before turning and grabbing more dishes from the table. The worked in silence, the background drone of the TV and the other four talking casually the only noise in the room. It was nice just to stand next to her, doing something so simple, Chandler realized. This is what it feels like to be truly in love.

They finished in no time—Monica was a cleaning professional and drying was a pretty easy job—but were in no rush to join the others in front of the TV, so they just took a seat in the kitchen and joined their hands together under the table, half listening to the conversation in the other room, which surprisingly no one had tried to drag them into yet.

"You doing okay?" Chandler asked quietly, running his thumb over the back of her hand.

"I told you, I'm fine," she answered.

"You don't have to be 'fine' with me, you know," he responded seriously. "It's me. You can tell me how you're actually feeling, because I want to take care of you, okay?"

"Hey aren't you two done cleaning up yet? We 're gonna put on a movie!" Joey called back to them, interrupting the moment.

"Yeah, we're coming," Monica responded. "Let me make popcorn real quick." She stood up, pulled her hand out of Chandler's grasp, and subtly stroked it along the back of his head. "Go ahead," she nodded. He stood up to move the chair in the living room (it was big enough to fit the both of them, and no one would think twice of them sharing it), when Monica stopped him one more time with a hand on his arm. "And, I really am okay. But you'll be the first one to know when I'm not. Thanks."

He smiled back at her, suddenly shy, but also suddenly overcome with the urge to kiss her. Just a few more days, he told himself as he finally made his way over to the others. Just a few more days and the others would know. No more hiding, no more secrets. He should be scared, and maybe the old Chandler would be, but he wasn't. Not at all. The thought of really being with Monica—holding her, kissing her whenever he wanted, being there whenever she needed his help—well, he had never been so excited for anything in his life.

Monica joined him in the big chair and he loosely wrapped his arm around her shoulder. They were sitting close, but not close enough. Never close enough.

Just a few more days.


	4. Chapter 3

**This update took a little longer to write, but it's also a little longer than the last chapter so it evens out! It's completely unedited and a lot of it was written after midnight so if there are any mistakes it's because I'm tired...let me know if there's anything glaring and I may go back and fix it later, I just wanted to get something out there! Thank you to everyone who reviewed so far, and please keep them coming...reviews make me write faster!**

Chandler sat back on the couch as Monica paced back and forth in front of him. Rachel and Phoebe should be back from lunch any minute, and they were going to begin the process of telling the others. He still felt completely relaxed about the whole thing, more anxious to get it over with than anything. Monica, on the other hand, couldn't keep still. She had cleaned the kitchen and living room—twice each—before Chandler had finally wrangled her down next to him on the couch. That hadn't lasted long, but at least she wasn't rewashing the same plate over and over anymore.

"Babe, relax, come sit by me," he encouraged, grabbing one of her hands as she walked by. "Hey, c'mere." He pulled her into his lap and she buried her head in his neck.

"I don't know why I'm so nervous," she mumbled. "Like, what's the worst that can happen?"

"Shhh, it's okay," Chandler ran his hand soothingly through the back of her hair. She pulled back to meet his gaze. "They're going to be happy for us, right? It's only Phoebe and Rachel, this is the easy part."

"I know," she shook her head with a sigh. "God, I'm gonna be a mess when we tell Ross."

"You're a mess right now," Chandler teased, poking fondly at her cheek.

"Shut up," she huffed, but she was smiling, so Chandler counted it as a win. "I'd better move off of you or else we won't even get the chance to explain ourselves."

"Mmmmm…I don't care," Chandler murmured, leaning in to kiss her lips once, twice, then doing the same to her forehead.

"Chandler!" she giggled, pushing him backwards and rolling onto the cushion beside him.

"Fine, fine," he relented, settling back on the couch again and lightly resting his hand over hers, not quite holding it, just enough so that she'd know he was there.

"I hate that you can be so calm about this," Monica huffed suddenly, after a few moments of silence.

Chandler rolled his head to the side to look at her. "Why's that?"

"Because!" she exclaimed. " _I'm_ supposed to be the one in control! I'm supposed to be the one who keeps a level head and fixes my own problems and doesn't start _crying_ at the thought of my friends being upset with me! These stupid pregnancy hormones are messing everything up and I hate it! I hate it, I hate it, I hate it!"

"Oh, Mon," Chandler shifted closer so that their sides were pressed together and pulled her hand—the one he had been caressing—against his chest. "It's okay, you don't have to take care of everything right now. Your only job is to keep yourself healthy so our baby has a nice place to live and grow, okay? Let me take care of the rest."

"I hate it," she mumbled again, but with less energy this time and Chandler had to laugh a little bit at how much she reminded him of a petulant child who didn't want to go to bed.

"I know you do, sweetheart," he soothed, kissing the top of her head in a way that had become almost as natural as breathing over the past few weeks. If he was going to freak out about anything, it was just how deeply in love with her he'd fallen in the relatively short time they'd been together. He had never been in a real long-term relationship before (the closest he's come was, well, _Janice_ , and he usually tried to pretend that never happened anyways), and sometimes he wondered if it was normal to be ready to commit to someone for life after going out only five months.

But this wasn't just some girlfriend, this was _Monica_ , his best friend, his confidant, and now his lover, and he couldn't imagine wanting to be with anyone else ever again. They had agreed to take it slow, he knew, and that was the right decision. There was no need to rush anything. But he also couldn't stop picturing what it would be like to propose, to marry her, to have more kids with here. Hell, they hadn't even had the first one yet! But whenever he thought of the future, of being with her forever, it just felt so _right_.

They heard voices coming up the stairs, towards the apartment, and gave each other one last look. Monica slid to the other side of the couch so that no part of them was touching. He understood what she was doing—easing them into it—but he missed the physical contact anyways.

"Here goes," she said, taking a deep breath and folding her arms across her body. She was still so nervous, and it made Chandler's heart twinge with longing to comfort her.

"It'll be okay," he repeated, before standing up and moving towards the kitchen. He knew she needed him there as support, but this was something she wanted to be the one to do.

The voices came closer and the door swung open, the girls chattering all the way.

"Hey Mon! Hey Chandler," Rachel greeted, hanging up her purse by the door.

Hey, um…" Monica started, standing up from her place on the couch. "guys? Can I…can I talk to you?"

"Sure Monica, what's wrong?" Phoebe asked. Rachel turned around and both girls eyed Monica with concern, while Chandler tried his best to fade into the background.

"I'm um…oh god," she exhaled shakily and slowly sat down on the coffee table. Phoebe and Rachel rushed to her side.

"What? Honey, talk to us," Rachel said, worry evident in her voice as she grabbed one of Monica's hands and Phoebe grabbed the other. Monica looked to be on the verge of tears and Chandler wanted desperately to go to her.

"I'm…I'm pregnant."

Silence filled the room, as Rachel and Phoebe looked at each other, back at Monica, then at each other again. In the kitchen, Chandler held his breath, willing one of them to say something, _anything_ , to comfort her, to tell her that they're there for her.

"What?" Rachel finally broke the silence.

"I'm pregnant," Monica repeated. "I…I don't know how. I mean, I know _how_ , but…I am. And I'm going to keep it. And…I really hope you guys will support me, because I'm scared, but I'm sure about this." She looked up at Chandler as she finished and caught his eye, and he couldn't help but smile because _wow_ , she really was incredible.

"Oh honey, of course we're here for you!" Rachel exclaimed, throwing her arms around her friend.

"Whatever you need," Phoebe added, joining their group hug.

"Really?"

"Really," Rachel confirmed. "Oh my god, Mon, a _baby_! You're having a baby!"

"I know!" Monica exclaimed, smile now on her face.

"Wait!" Phoebe stopped suddenly, and Chandler knew what was coming. "Who's the father?"

Monica pulled back from the hug and ran her hand through her hair, but the small smile never left her face. "Well, that's…that's the other thing." She looked up at Chandler again but held his gaze this time, and he knew he was grinning like an idiot but he didn't care.

It took a moment, but the other two caught on and turned around slowly, as if just remembering that someone else was in the room.

"Noooo!" Rachel gasped, hands covering her mouth. Chandler took it as his cue to actually join the conversation and moved to sit next to Monica on the coffee table. Clearly more confident now that she had the support of her best friends, she took his arm and wrapped it around her own shoulder so that she was cuddled against his side. Exactly where he wanted her to be, always, if he was honest.

"You? Really?" Phoebe exclaimed and Chandler should probably be hurt by the skepticism in her tone but she had a fair point.

"Yeah," he responded dreamily, eyes still glued to Monica. Should he be focusing more on the other two, on answering their questions and making sure they don't freak out? Probably. But he didn't care. For the first time he was holding his girlfriend around their friends, and he was floating on cloud nine. Fortunately, Monica had the presence of mind to continue the conversation.

"Chandler and I…we're kind of…together."

"You're _what_?!" Phoebe demanded, not unkindly, but certainly not in the most positive tone.

"We just…we didn't want to make it a big deal while we were figuring everything out, is all," Chandler explained, finally drawing his attention back to the other two.

"We were going to tell you all soon," Monica added.

"How long has this been going on?" Rachel asked.

"Since we were in London," Chandler cringed, prepared for the backlash at having kept it a secret for so long. What he was not prepared for was the apartment door opening to reveal Joey, no doubt in search of food.

"Hey everyone!" he greeted casually, making his way to the fridge. No one said anything and after a moment he caught on. "What's going on?" he asked.

"Chandler and Monica are having a baby!" Rachel blurted out and Chandler felt Monica tense next to him.

" _What?!_ " Joey shrieked, head frantically darting back and forth between the two of them. "You're…and you're… _what?!_ "

"It's true," Chandler stopped him. "We've been kind of dating for the past few months, and Monica's pregnant."

"You're…what…how?" Joey's eyes were still moving all over the place, and if it was anyone else Chandler would be a little freaked out, but he knew well enough that this was—somehow—Joey's way of processing it.

"It wasn't planned, obviously," Monica explained. "But…we're really excited. We're serious about this."

"We are," Chandler confirmed, taking her hand closest to him and kissing it.

"Ohhhh, I'm so happy for you guys!" Rachel squealed, legs bouncing.

"Me too," Phoebe added. "So, are you getting married, or?"

"Oh no, no," they both answered hurriedly.

"We're going to keep things the way they are, you know," Monica explained. "Take it slow, let our relationship develop like it would have if this didn't happen."

"Oh yeah, because when you're having a baby is the perfect time to slow things down," Phoebe remarked with a roll of her eyes.

"We don't need to get married," Chandler defended. "We're both committed to the baby, and we're committed to each other, that's enough."

"Well, I think it's great," Rachel assured them. "I mean… _wow_ I never saw this coming but you two! And you look so happy!"

"We are," Monica agreed.

"Joe? You okay? You haven't said anything for a while," Chandler directed attention back at the other man, who was still jerking his head back and forth between the two of them, eyes wide with shock. At the mention of his name, he gave a jolt before blinking rapidly.

"Me? I'm great! I just can't believe this, I mean, you two? And you're having a baby? This is…this is just so unbelievable!" he stuttered.

"I know this must be a lot for you guys to take in," Chandler responded. "Hell, I know it's a lot for us to take in and we've been here the entire time. It just means a lot that we have your support."

Monica pulled his face down to meet hers and kissed him for the first time in front of their friends, to _awwws_ from both girls and _dude!_ from Joey.

"Also, please no one tell Ross yet," Monica inserted. "We're going to tell him really soon, we just want him to hear it from us."

"Yes, and preferably somewhere with an easy escape route for when he tries to kill me," Chandler added.

"He won't kill you," Monica argued.

"Dude he's totally going to kill you," Joey confirmed. The other four launched into a debate about just how angry Ross would be (at least no one was delusional enough to think he'd take the news as well as Phoebe, Rachel, and Joey had), while Chandler just sat back and watched. He watched the woman he loved joke around with their friends, the tension from earlier in the day gone completely and happier and lighter than he'd seen her in almost a month. It had been a relief to him that the other three had been so accepting; he couldn't even begin to imagine what she was feeling.

He felt a hand on the side of his face and turned to see Monica gazing back at him.

"You're quiet," she commented.

"I guess so," he responded simply.

"Any reason why?"

"I'm just happy," he grinned, leaning down slightly to kiss her. "You okay? Want to take a nap before dinner?"

"Nah, I'm all good," she yawned, then giggled as Chandler poked her side.

"We'll just leave you two alone for a bit," Joey smirked, standing up and ushering the girls across the hall while sending knowing glances back at them. Chandler just rolled his eyes and pressed a kiss to the top of Monica's head before standing up and pulling her with him.

"Chandler, I said I'm fine!" she protested, pulling her arm away. He just huffed out a laugh and wrapped an arm around her shoulder to steer her towards her bedroom. " _Chandler!_ "

"Don't sleep then," Chandler shrugged, sitting down on the bed and kicking his shoes off. "Just come lie down with me and close your eyes for a bit."

She narrowed her eyes, but removed her shoes all the same and sat down next to him. He pulled her to his chest and lay backwards, arms around her. She sunk into him, inhaling and exhaling deeply.

"Well played," she mumbled sleepily, and Chandler chuckled fondly.

"So I win?"

Shut up," she grumbled, words becoming slurred as she fell asleep. Chandler tightened his hold on her and waited until he felt her breathing even out before he closed his own eyes and drifted off to sleep himself. He vaguely registered that they hadn't set an alarm, but quickly dismissed the thought. They didn't need to hide anymore. Rachel or Phoebe or Joey could walk in and they would already know. They could fall asleep together without the risk of being discovered. Tomorrow they planned to talk to Ross, then that was it.

Chandler fell asleep with a smile on his face.

* * *

"Are you _sure_ you don't want me to say?" Chandler asked again, as Monica herded him towards the door. They had ended up sleeping for over three hours before Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe must've gotten bored and came back over in search of food, and Ross had arrived shortly after. Dinner was uneventful, though the others kept sending them looks and Chandler was a bit worried that Ross would notice. He never did, though, and ended up being the first one to leave, stating that he had a lot more unpacking to do.

Joey had left a few minutes ago, and Monica had suggested that Chandler join him. "We just spent the whole day together," she had said. "It'll be good for us to not be together every second." Chandler still didn't want to leave her alone, especially now that he didn't have to be over there in secret, but she just argued.

"Chandler, I'll be _fine_ ," she said with a roll of her eyes. "Phoebe and Rachel are here, you're literally right across the hall, nothing is going to happen. Go spend some time with Joey."

"But you'll call me if you need something?" he pushed.

"You'll be the first to know," she assured him, nudging him into the hall. She pulled him down for a kiss goodbye and smiled. "Come over first thing tomorrow?"

"I love you," Chandler said with a smile.

"I love you too," she replied. He leaned in to kiss her once more before she turned around to head back into her apartment and closed the door behind her. He knew she wanted to talk to the girls alone, and he should probably talk to Joey, but he couldn't help it. He missed her already. He had spent literally every minute with her today, and now after ten seconds apart he missed her. She was right, they did need to practice being apart.

He sighed, and turned around to follow his roommate into their apartment. Joey was sitting in his Barcalounger facing the door, arms crossed over his chest, waiting. Chandler stopped in the kitchen, leaned forward against the counter, and looked down at where his hands gripped the edge of the white surface.

"Lay it on me," he said, not looking up.

"Dude!" Joey exclaimed.

"I know," Chandler huffed, shaking his head. He glanced up briefly, then moved to sit in his own chair. He ran his hands over his face and back through his hair before settling his elbows on his knees and facing Joey straight on. "It's all…it's a lot," he admitted. "I don't even know where to start."

"How did this even happen?! I mean, how did none of us know?"

"I know," Chandler repeated. "It started in London, when you were off with that bridesmaid. Neither of us were having the best night, and it just kind of happened. Then it never…stopped happening," he finished with a shrug. "We didn't want to make it a big deal in case something didn't work out. We couldn't let ourselves become another Ross and Rachel thing. And now…"

"So are you guys, like, serious then?" Joey asked.

Chandler just smiled. There really weren't words for how serious about her he was, and definitely not words he was prepared to share with anyone in their group, even Joey. So he just answered simply, "I love her."

"Are you gonna get married then?"

"Nope."

"Why not?"

That was the more difficult question. A few weeks ago, when this had been so new, it had made perfect sense to go slowly; they didn't need to get married just because they were having a kid. They were young, it was too soon, they weren't ready yet, or any other excuse they had come up with at the time. Now, though, Chandler couldn't remember a single reason. Truthfully they had bonded over this pregnancy, become closer in the past two or so weeks than he could have ever imagined, and suddenly the idea of marriage didn't seem so ridiculous to him. Hell, if she wanted, he would marry her tomorrow.

She didn't want that though, or so she had said, and Chandler wasn't going to bring it up again when she had so much else to worry about. They didn't _need_ to be married, after all.

"Because," he answered. "There's no reason to."

"I think getting a girl pregnant is a pretty good reason," Joey accused, beginning to raise his voice, and Chandler couldn't exactly blame him.

"I know, _I know_ , and we did talk about it, we _did_ ," he explained. "But it just doesn't make sense for us right now. Things are going so well, and we're both really excited about having a baby, we don't want to rush anything. We're just gonna, you know, keep going the way we are."

Joey narrowed his eyes. "You're lying. I'm an actor, I can tell when someone's memorizing lines, and _that_ was memorized!" he accused. Chandler was stuck. Joey was right, of course, that was what he and Monica had agreed, but not what he wanted. It had even sounded fake to him as he said it. But he couldn't admit what he was actually thinking, not to Joey, not to anyone. Not before he had talked to Monica. That was their key, wasn't it? Communication? That they came to each other first, talked about their feelings, all those things Chandler usually avoided in a relationship. So if he wasn't going to tell her—and he wasn't, not for a long time at least—he _definitely_ wasn't going to tell Joey.

"It's fine, Joe," he said instead. "It works for us, and we're happy. Isn't that enough?"

"Yeah, I guess," Joey allowed. "I'm happy for you, man, I really am. You seem really excited about this."

"I am excited," Chandler grinned, something he knew he had been doing a lot lately; he was just _that_ happy.

"I mean, if a girl I was seeing told me _she_ was pregnant, I'd be seriously flipping out right now."

"I did at first," Chandler admitted. "I just kinda hid for a few days before I realized how stupid I was being. I mean, it's Monica. I couldn't lose her, no matter how scared I was. And the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I want this. I didn't know I could want this, but I do. After that it didn't seem so scary."

"Wow," Joey shook his head. "Good on you man, all grown up and everything."

Chandler smiled and reached for the TV remote; nothing else needed to be said. Chandler wasn't ready to divulge every feeling he had for Monica, and Joey knew him well enough not to ask. They weren't like the girls in that they didn't need to have long heart-to-hearts to feel connected, just sitting in front of the TV for a while was good enough for them.

It had been too long since they'd done this, Chandler realized. Ever since London, any free moment he had he tried to spend with Monica, leaving him a lot less time to have "guy time" with his best friend. It was nice, and now that they didn't have to worry about sneaking around he'd have more time to spend here.

It was already late when they got back from dinner, so they didn't watch for too long before Chandler decided to call it a night. He wanted to be up early so he could go and see Monica before the rest of the gang congregated there for breakfast. He got up and headed in the direction of his room with a quick "night" thrown over his shoulder to Joey.

"Wait," Joey stopped him, and he turned around in his doorway. "I know you're gonna get the big brother talk from Ross at some point, so I just wanna say…be careful. Like, don't hurt her obviously, but don't let her hurt you either. Take care of yourself, okay man?"

Chandler smiled at his roommate's concern. "Yeah, thanks Joe," he nodded before closing the door behind him.

* * *

It was early when Chandler crossed the hall the next morning; Monica's bedroom door was still closed, so the girls must have stayed up pretty late talking last night. He could only imagine the details they had wanted, and honestly he'd just rather not know what they talked about when he wasn't around (a total lie, he knew he'd ask Monica as soon as he saw her).

He crept into her room and slid his shoes off before lying down next to her, over the covers. He wasn't tired anymore, so he just lay there and watched her sleep. She was stunningly beautiful, something he never failed to notice, even before they got together, and he couldn't help run a hand softly down her cheek. She began to stir as he did so, and she rolled closer to him as if on instinct.

"Mmmm…Chandler?" she mumbled without opening her eyes.

"Shhh you can go back to sleep babe," he whispered.

"No, no, I'm up," she groaned, slowly blinking her eyes and reaching her arms out to him. He pulled her closer and kissed the top of her head. "Seriously, I need to get up," she repeated, pushing him away and rolling onto her back so she could sit up.

"Mon, it's Sunday, you can sleep as long as you want," he reasoned.

"No, if I don't get up soon, I never will," she argued. "This stupid pregnancy thing is making me so tired all the time, I'm gonna want to take a nap later today anyways. And I need to at least be awake enough to tell Ross today."

Shit. Ross. They had agreed to talk to him today, hadn't they? He hadn't been nervous before, but telling the others had been so easy that he was waiting for the other shoe to drop. Before he could say anything, Monica had shot out of bed and Chandler knew exactly what was going on. He followed close behind her to the bathroom, where he saw her hunched over the toilet. He kept his distance for a moment, unsure of how much space she wanted, and instead went to get a glass of water from the kitchen for when she was done.

He set it on the bathroom counter as she stood up on shaky legs, and immediately his arm was round her waist.

"You okay?" he asked.

"That was nothing," she rolled her eyes, and he smiled down at her.

"You're amazing," he said fondly, leaning down to kiss her forehead.

"Oh shut up," she moaned. "I'm all sweaty and gross and I just woke up. You're not winning any points here."

"Who said anything about points?" Chandler asked in fake surprise. "I'm not allowed to compliment my girlfriend for no reason?"

"Not before I've showered, you're not," Monica lightly slapped him on the hip and shoved him out of the bathroom. "I'll be out in a bit." She closed the door behind herself and Chandler went to get the coffee started. Rachel emerged from her room a few minutes later, shooting him a glare that clearly said _don't talk to me before coffee_ as he pushed a mug towards her.

They sat in silence until she woke up fully, the shower still running. Chandler would be worried that she was taking so long, but he knew she was starting to get tired and sore and the hot water was providing a temporary relief.

"So," Rachel began finally. "Monica filled us in last night."

"I figured she would," Chandler responded slowly, unsure where this was going.

"Are you really up for this?" she asked. "Because no offence but this whole 'super boyfriend, super dad' thing is really unlike you."

Chandler laughed. "It is, isn't it?" She wasn't amused (whether it was the early hour or the topic, he wasn't sure, but either way Chandler sobered up) and he continued. "I don't know what to tell you, Rach. I want to be around, I want to be here for her, and for the baby. It feels right, like this is what was supposed to happen the whole time. I could never give this up for the world."

Rachel was speechless and the water shut off in the bathroom. Monica emerged moments later with a towel wrapped under her arms and another around her hair. She sent Chandler a smile—clearly in a much better mood than when she got in—which he returned shyly, as she made her way across the floor to her room to change.

When the door closed behind her again, Chandler turned back to Rachel, who was staring at him with a mixture of shock and awe.

"You're really serious aren't you?" she asked, eyes wide.

"Umm…yeah, pretty much," he shrugged, suddenly uncomfortable with her attention on him. Just then, the front door opened to reveal Phoebe, and now Chandler _really_ wanted Monica to hurry up because he was starting to feel cornered by the two girls and Phoebe hadn't even said anything yet.

"Hey you guys," she greeted, hanging her purse and coat by the door. "What's up?"

"He's actually in love with her," Rachel answered out of the blue, and Chandler felt his cheeks heat up because _duh_ but that didn't mean they all needed to _talk_ about it.

"Ooh he totally is!" Phoebe agreed. "Look at him, he's so embarrassed!"

"I don't like where this is going…" Chandler started, but the two girls just continued to talk over him.

"…just waiting for something to freak you out…"

"…but what if you two get married…"

"…honestly have never seen two people so cute…"

Just then he felt arms wrap around him from behind.

"My savior," he exhaled, tilting his head to the side so that it made contact with Monica's.

"Everything okay?" she asked.

"They're torturing me," he informed her. "Tell them to stop."

"Guys, stop torturing Chandler," she repeated, but Phoebe and Rachel just shot them knowing glances and Chandler was no less wary of the knowing looks on their faces. So what if he was in love? They had been going out for almost six months, he was allowed to be in love.

"When are you guys telling Ross?" Rachel asked, and Chandler froze a little bit at the mention of the dreaded event. Dread may be a bit strong, but he certainly wasn't looking forward to telling his best friend that he had knocked up his little sister.

"Whenever he gets here," Monica answered. "So when he does if you guys could be…somewhere else, we would really appreciate that."

"Oh yeah of course honey, whatever you need!" Rachel exclaimed. "We can leave now if you two need to talk before he gets here."

"I think we're okay," she looked to him for confirmation, and he gave it with a kiss on her cheek. "We've talked about how we want this to go, and I think if we talk about it any more we'll just freak ourselves out."

"More than we already have," Chandler added.

"Exactly," Monica nodded.

"If you say so," Phoebe shrugged. Just then, the door opened again, and Ross shuffled in. The girls looked at them, before mumbling excuses and heading across the hall, most likely to wake Joey up.

Chandler was shaking. It was time. Monica was still standing pressed to his side, but no closer than they had stood in the past and Ross didn't seem to notice anything out of the ordinary. Oh, if he only knew, thought Chandler. He put his half-empty coffee mug on the counter behind him and wordlessly moved to the couch. Monica had wanted to take the lead on this one, too, but he was to be right there the whole time.

"What's up guys?" Ross asked, after no one had said anything since the girls left almost a full minute ago.

"Ross…there's something I need to tell you."

Her voice was steadier than it had been the day before when she had had this same conversation with the girls, and Chandler wondered if she was actually calmer about this than she had led him to believe, or if she had just gotten better at hiding it.

"Mon, what's wrong?" Ross asked, looking between his sister and Chandler, whose eyes hadn't left Monica the entire time.

She took a deep breath and moved to lean against the back of the couch near where Chandler was sitting, probably so Ross could see them both at once (and to create a buffer for when Ross ultimately went to attack him, Chandler's brain added helpfully).

"When we were in London, some stuff happened, and well, Chandler and I have been sort of…dating for the past few months."

Ross blinked slowly and Chandler squeezed his eyes shut, unable to watch.

"Wow, well, I can't say I'm not surprised…" Ross began, but Monica cut him off.

"That's not all," she reached down to squeeze Chandler's hand, and Chandler had to take a deep breath to keep himself from passing out from nerves.

"I'm pregnant."

 ***gasp* how will Ross react? stay tuned folks! if you wanna find out quicker, drop me a review...they make me more motivated to write!**


	5. Chapter 4

**You guys are amazing with all the reviews! This chapter is a bit shorter than the last two, but this really seemed like a good place to stop so I figured I'd get something published nice and quickly for you all before we settle into the grind that is the bulk of the pregnancy. Also, a few people have mentioned showing some conversations from Monica's POV. My original intention when I started writing this was in fact to switch between Monica and Chandler's POV, but the more I get into this I've found it just flows better keeping it from one POV (though this may change again in the future, who knows). If there are any specific events you want from Monica's POV, I may consider doing a series of oneshots to companion this piece. Thoughts? As always, reviews make me a very happy writer and also make me want to give you guys more chapters, so let me know what you think of this chapter, and the story as a whole!**

Chandler gripped Monica's hand like a lifeline as silence filled the room. He couldn't bring himself to look at Ross, kept his eyes squeezed shut. _Please just say something_ he pleaded in his head. _Anything._

"Ross?" Monica prompted. "Say something?" In any other situation, Chandler would be grinning at how in tune he and Monica are, but right now he's too busy trying to keep his breathing under control to do much of anything else.

"You're…you're _pregnant?_ " Ross finally bit out. Monica didn't say anything, but Chandler assumed she nodded because he continued, "And…it's his?"

"Yes," Monica whispered. Ross didn't respond and Chandler braced himself to look up and try to gauge Ross's expression when Monica jerked closer to him, standing in between Chandler and her brother. "Ross!" she exclaimed, and now Chandler did look up to see Ross towering over the tow of them. He jumped up himself and put his hands on Monica's shoulder.

"Ross…" Chandler started.

"What were you _thinking?!_ " Ross cut him off angrily. "My _sister?!_ Of all the _stupid_ things, you go and knock up my _sister?!_ I should kill you!"

"Ross!" Monica shouted again, pushing him backwards. "I'm an adult! I don't need you defending me or whatever the hell you're trying to do." She looked back at Chandler and reached for his hand again. He gave it to her, and she pulled his to her chest. "We didn't plan this, but it's happening, and we're really excited. Can't you be supportive?"

"Is he?" Ross asked skeptically, sending a glare Chandler's way.

Chandler knelt on the couch behind his girlfriend and wrapped the arm she wasn't already holding around her waist. He hooked his chin over her shoulder and met Ross's eyes dead-on.

"I love her more than anything in the world," he said seriously, squeezing the hand Monica was holding. "I'd never leave her, or the baby. I'm exactly where I want to be."

"It's true," Monica added. "He's been incredible, and I love him too. We really want this."

He and Ross remained locked in a staring contest for a few moments more, before Ross broke eye contact to stare at Monica again. Finally, when it seemed like Monica was about to break the silence, Ross spoke up again.

"So…when are you getting married then?"

"We're not," Monica answered and Chandler knew before she even said it that that was the wrong thing to say.

"You're _what?!_ " Ross screamed, and Monica flinched back into Chandler.

"We're not getting married," Monica repeated.

"What do you mean 'you're not getting married'?!" he responded, growing in volume with each sentence. "Of course you're getting married! You're having a baby!"

"Oh you're one to talk!" Monica shouted back. "Marriage is the solution? Well how'd that work out for _you_? You're the _last_ person to give relationship advice, and you can't tell us what to do!"

"Clearly you need someone to tell you what to do!" Ross argued. "And don't you dare throw that back in my face, at least I wasn't stupid enough to get my girlfriend pregnant!"

"Can you, give us a minute, Chandler?" Monica turned her attention back to him. "I think Ross and I need to talk alone." Chandler eyed Ross warily as he slipped past, leaving Monica with one last kiss on the cheek.

As he opened the door, the door across the hall banged shut and he sighed, knowing that the others had heard everything. He entered his own apartment where the other three were gathered around the counter, feigning casual. They all looked up when he closed the door behind him.

"I know you guys heard all that," he sighed, grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge. They looked at each other guiltily and Chandler just shook his head, going to sit down in his chair.

"So was it as bad as it sounded?" Phoebe cringed.

"Probably," Chandler shrugged. "I mean, he's obviously not happy, but Monica can hold her own when it comes to him." He took another sip of his water, not feeling much up to talking. It was true, Monica was more than capable of standing up to her brother, and realistically Chandler shouldn't be worried about her. But lately "worried about her" had become his default whenever she was further than arms reach away; he couldn't help it, she was carrying his baby and he really did want to be with her every second.

"You okay, man?" Joey asked.

"Not really," Chandler admitted, running his hands over his face. "I feel so useless just sitting in here like this. I got her into this, technically. I should be in there supporting her."

"Chandler, it's _Monica_ ," Rachel reasoned. "She can take care of herself."

"That's not the point!" he exclaimed, tossing the now-empty water bottle to the side. "I know she _can_ , but she shouldn't have to! I'm the boyfriend, I'm supposed to be there for her, I shouldn't be sitting back like this! Should I go back over there?"

"Dude, you gotta calm down," Joey prodded him. "She's fine, Ross will calm down and they'll probably be over here in a minute."

"I…I know," he finally surrendered, sinking back into the chair. "Can you guys just…not talk to me for a few minutes?"

"Yeah, whatever you need honey," Rachel soothed, patting him on the head before walking over to the door. "So are we gonna go listen some more, or?"

Joey and Phoebe jumped up, and Chandler turned his chair to face the wall with the TV unit, but made no move to turn on the TV. The door clicked shut as the other three went back to eavesdrop on whatever was happening across the hall and Chandler was alone with his thoughts.

As it turned out, that was exactly where he shouldn't be, because pretty much every thought in his head at the moment was centered on _Monica_ and _Monica and the baby_ and _Monica across the hall where he currently isn't_. He had nearly worked himself into a panic within minutes, and didn't even notice the apartment door opening.

"Chandler?" and that was Ross _crap that was Ross._

Chandler spun around in his chair and stood up, still not coming quite to Ross's height but close enough to fake confidence. "Hi," he responded cautiously.

"I talked to Monica," Ross started. "Look…I'm sorry if I overreacted before. It's just…she's my baby sister, I'm allowed to be a little over protective, aren't I?"

"No, I know, you have every right to get upset," he replied, putting his hands up in surrender. "It's…it's not ideal, I know that, and I swear we never meant for this to happen. But I meant what I said before, I'm so in love with her. I'm here for whatever she needs, whatever she wants. I know this is a big deal, but I want to do this. And if I screw up, you have full permission to kick my ass."

Ross looked at him seriously. "I know you do, I can see that. Monica kinda told me off already for implying that you're not serious. That woman can be _scary_." He smiled and Chandler smiled back because _oh boy_ did he know. "And sure, it would be nice if you guys were getting married, but I guess I can understand why you're waiting."

"So you're…you're okay with all this?" Chandler asked.

"Well, not _okay_ obviously, but I'm behind you guys one hundred percent."

Chandler breathed the biggest sigh of relief of his life. "Thanks man, seriously. That means a lot."

"Alright, bring it in," Ross opened his arms and Chandler met him halfway for a semi-manly hug. "And in case you didn't know, she's crazy about you too."

And there he was again, grinning like the idiot in love that he was because it was one thing to hear her say it, but to have it come from someone else? He really felt like the luckiest guy in the world.

"Is she still over there?" he asked gesturing to across the hall.

"Yeah," Ross answered. "Phoebe, Rachel, and Joey were in the hall when I left, so everyone should be there now."

They crossed the hall between the two apartments to find the other four gathered in the living room area, Monica in the armchair and the other three on the couch.

"Hello, children," he greeted, making a beeline for the armchair. "Hey you." Monica smiled up at him and reached for him where he came within arm's length of her seat, pulling him into the chair with her. It took a minute to rearrange themselves so that Chandler was sitting in the chair with Monica seated horizontally across his lap. He wrapped his arms around her waist and found one of his hands gravitating to her stomach, where in just a few weeks he'd be able to actually feel his baby moving and growing. It was a bit surreal to think about.

"Awww would you look at them?" Phoebe cooed.

"How in the _world_ did you manage to keep this a secret for six months?" Ross asked. "You're all over each other."

"Lots of effort," Monica responded.

"Too much effort," Chandler added, bumping his forehead against the side of her head. "Why the hell did we wait so long?"

"Hey, don't look at me, it was you're idea!" Monica laughed, poking him in the stomach.

"Yeah, but it's your job to disagree with me," he responded.

"Oh, would you stop?"

"Hmmm…nope," he grinned and kissed her cheek.

"You're cute," she commented, and Chandler felt himself blush, suddenly remembering that their friends were all there now, watching them bicker. It was so nice to have everything out in the open, but acting like a real couple in front of their friends would take some getting used to for sure. "Now lemme up, I gotta pee." He kissed her cheek one more time before removing his arms from her waist so she could move. When the bathroom door closed behind her, Chandler felt four sets of eyes on him.

"What?"

"Nothing, nothing!" Rachel rushed. "It's just weird seeing you like this. Both of you. And together, especially."

"Yeah, I don't think anyone saw this coming," Phoebe added.

"Yeah, I know," Chandler admitted. "I sure didn't. It just happened, I guess. I'm assuming Monica told you everything?"

"Told them everything about what?" Monica asked, coming out of the bathroom and returning to her spot on his lap.

"She didn't actually," Rachel answered. "Why, did you tell Joey?"

"No, I just assumed you girls talked about everything last night."

"No, we just talked about how cute you are," Monica assured him. "And I showed them the sonogram."

"I wanna see!" Ross interjected. Monica pointed to the end table where she had left the picture the night before, and though he had spent hours looking already Chandler itched to see it again.

"So, tell us then!" Rachel prompted when Ross had the sonogram in hand. "How did it happen?"

"Well," Monica began. "I was having a kind of rough night after the rehearsal dinner. My mom said some stuff, some…guy said some stuff," both he and Monica cringed at the reminder of the drunk man. "I drank…probably too much, and Chandler was just really sweet, and made sure I got back to my room safely."

"And…?" Joey prompted.

"And about an hour later I didn't want to be alone anymore, so I went back to his room, somehow ended up kissing him…"

"Yeah I don't think either of us will ever know how that happened," Chandler inserted.

"Do you want to tell this?" she glared at him, and he shot her an innocent smile. "Anyways, we kissed for a bit, and it just kind of went for there. And we never stopped." She shrugged and smiled at him, and he playfully poked his nose against hers before kissing her quickly.

"We didn't want to tell anyone until we were sure that it would work out," Chandler explained when he had torn his gaze away from Monica again. "It wasn't something either of us had thought about before, so we wanted to be really sure we were on the same page before getting the rest of you involved. Clearly someone had other plans," he sent a glance down to Monica's stomach and she rolled her eyes fondly. "I think this has all worked out for the best."

"What about when you got pregnant? When did that happen?" Phoebe asked, earning a "Phoebe!" from Ross.

"Pheebs, we'd been dating for like four months at that point, we were having a lot of sex; how are we supposed to know exactly which time it happened?" Monica asked, and Chandler lightly slapped her arm at her honesty.

"Okay, I so did _not_ need to know all that," Ross whined and in fairness Chandler was on his side on this one (not that he would ever voice that—Monica was calling the shots here).

"Shut up, the rest of us did," Rachel scolded.

"Wow Chandler, didn't know you had it in you!" Phoebe exclaimed.

"Ooookay, time to change the subject," Chandler interrupted.

"When's your next doctor's visit?" Ross asked.

"Two weeks," Monica answered. "We should be able to hear the baby's heartbeat by then!"

"Oh man, are you gonna cry," Ross stated, and Chandler didn't even bother with a response, just shrugged, because it was almost certainly true. He had already teared up at the tiny, unidentifiable blip on the sonogram; the rest of this pregnancy was sure to bring waterworks for both of them.

They chatted for a few minutes longer, reminiscing about when Carol had been pregnant with Ben, and Ross had gone through it all with her. It felt so unbelievably good to sit in a group of the six of them and not feel a huge secret weighing him down. He felt freer than he had been in months. Finally someone suggested heading down to the coffeehouse for a while and everyone quickly agreed. Chandler got Monica's coat for her and helped her put it on to yet another chorus of "awww"s from their friends, and it felt so normal, like they had been doing this forever. He hadn't been scared before, not really, but now, with the full support of their friends, he felt ready to take on anything the next few months would throw at them. They were strongest as a group; nothing could tear them down.

"You okay?" Monica whispered to him as the followed the other four downstairs, hand-in-hand.

"Honey, I'm amazing. You're amazing. Everything is amazing," he responded giddily, and she giggled.

"I am pretty amazing," she agreed with a smirk.

"I'm not even gonna respond to that, that's how happy I am," he added, taking his hand from hers to wrap it around her shoulders.

"Wow, that's pretty happy."

They stopped just in front of Central Perk. The other four had already gone in, but Chandler wanted just one quick moment alone with her before they rejoined the group. That was one thing he would miss about keeping it a secret; any privacy they had had in the previous few months would now be completely replaced by their nosy friends' desire to be involved in each other's' lives. Oh well, you can't have it all, Chandler thought to himself, looking into the beautiful blue eyes of the girl he loved.

"I love you," he said out loud, because he could, and reveled in the blush that still always tinted her cheeks whenever he spoke those words.

"I love you too," she responded, and he was sure his smile would tear his face in two. He still couldn't believe how incredibly lucky he was to have all of this, to have a girlfriend as wonderful as Monica, to have a baby on the way that he already loved more than anything in the world, to have friends who supported them unconditionally.

On second thought, he mused, maybe you can have it all.

 **Questions? Comments? Criticisms? Leave them all in the reviews! Also, if there's anything you want to see happen in this story, feel free to let me know! I have the general sequence planned out, but I'm all for making adjustments!**


	6. Chapter 5

**Happy New Year everyone! I've been keeping busy with family for the holidays so I didn't have as much time to write as I'd have liked. I feel like this chapter is kind of a mess but I promise you I'm going somewhere with this story, so just stick with me! Slight warning for mentions of sex at the end of the chapter, but nothing graphic...thank you to everyone who has read and reviewed so far...y'all make me love writing again! Please keep it up with the feedback and hopefully I'll have another chapter out to you guys this week!**

"Chandler! Hurry up! We're going to be late!"

Chandler hid an eye roll as he pulled on his coat. Monica had been in a mood all morning, and the closer they came to the doctor's appointment, the snippier she became. Chandler was trying his best to just grin and bear it; he knew she was tired, sore, and hormonal, and had every right to be a bit crabby, but it was taking all of his strength not to give his usual quippy responses and send her further over the edge.

"Honey, we have over an hour, we'll get there in plenty of time," he assured her. He walked up behind her, wrapped his arms around her waist, and kissed her neck. "Just relax, okay?"

" _Chandler_ ," she whined. He chuckled and kissed her again, on the cheek this time, then turned her around to get her lips. She allowed herself to be manipulated in his embrace, then finally sagged against his chest, all the fight leaving her. "Can we please go? I just really don't want to be late."

"I know," Chandler responded, kissing her forehead tenderly. "Let's go."

He took her hand and led her downstairs to hail a cab. It was just starting to warm up, but the day was wet, so Chandler held her close to him while they waited for an empty taxi to pull up. He helped her into the back seat before sliding in next to her and giving the driver their destination. While slightly less on edge now that they were safely on their way, Monica was still more tense than not, and Chandler stroked his thumb over the back of her hand in an effort to soothe her nerves. She shot him a grateful smile and squeezed his hand, leaning to rest her head on his shoulder for the duration of the ride.

"You okay?" he whispered into her forehead.

"I think it just hit me this morning how real it all is," she admitted. "Like, this is how it'll be for the next seven months, except harder. I'm already so tired, I don't know if I can do it."

"Hey, come on now," Chandler murmured, bringing her hand up to kiss it. "You're the strongest, most amazing woman I know. If anyone can do this, it's you. And clearly you're not the first person to get pregnant." He grinned and shrugged, and she giggled, the set of her shoulders loosening ever so slightly, but it was enough. "Sure, it'll be hard, but we're gonna do this, okay? You and me together."

"I love you so much," she responded honestly, looking up to gaze into his eyes and he stared right back.

"I love you too, Mon," he replied, squeezing her hand again with a smile.

They spent the rest of the ride in comfortable silence, and when they did make it to the doctor's they were over twenty minutes early. Monica looked at her watch guiltily, but Chandler just shook his head and smiled before leading her inside. Fortunately, they didn't end up waiting for long before the receptionist called them back to a room where Monica changed into one of those typical hospital gowns—she still made Chandler turn the other way, no matter how many nights they slept beside each other—and they continued to wait in silence for Dr. McKay to make her appearance.

Chandler wished he was a mind reader, and could know what was going on in Monica's head. It made him nervous how in her own head she had been lately, and he wanted nothing more than for her to open up to him, to let him fix whatever it was. She was always the strong one, for all of them, and now it was Chandler's turn to be strong for her.

Just as he was about to vocalize his concern, there was a knock on the door and Dr. McKay appeared.

"Long time no see!" she greeted, going straight for the computer in the corner and clicking the mouse a few times. "How has everything been? Any questions before we get started here?"

Monica shook her head, still oddly quiet, and Chandler furrowed his eyebrows in concern. Dr. McKay just brushed right past it, continuing with her usual questions and taking her usual measurements, and Monica answered with what seemed like the shortest answers possible.

"I'll be back in one moment and we can take a look inside there!" Dr. McKay exclaimed. "We may even be able to hear the heartbeat today!" Without waiting for a response, she flitted back out of the room. Chandler followed after her without thinking, and stopped her just outside the door.

"I'm a bit worried," he admitted when she asked him what was wrong. "Is it…normal for her to be so quiet all the time? She's not usually this subdued, and when I ask her what's wrong, she never really gives an answer."

"Low energy during pregnancy is completely normal, especially during the first trimester," she assured him. "Her body is adjusting to the different hormone levels and other changes, she should pick back up again in the next few weeks."

"Is there anything I can do then?" he asked.

"Just make sure she's getting enough rest, enough nutrition, and isn't exhausting herself with strenuous work. You can continue keeping an eye on her, and give me a call if you see anything else that worries you, but so far everything seems to be in good condition."

Chandler breathed a sigh of relief, and thanked the doctor before turning around and heading back into the examination room.

"What was that about?" Monica asked before the door was even closed behind him.

"Nothing," he promised. "I just had to ask her a quick question, but everything is fine."

She stared him down for a moment, as if daring him to break and give her more information, but it didn't take long for her to deflate and Chandler moved to wrap his arms around her waist from behind so that she was half-lying on his chest.

"Mon?" he asked when they had settled in their position. Monica hummed in response. "You promise to say something if you feel anything wrong?"

She turned to meet his eyes, her own blue eyes wide with surprise. "Chandler, where is this coming from?" she asked.

"Just promise you'll tell me if you're not okay?" he repeated.

"Of course," she responded carefully. "Honey, are you sure you're okay?"

Chandler just laughed. "I'm not the one with a person growing in my uterus."

Monica smiled and pecked his cheek as Dr. McKay reentered the room to prep the ultrasound. Chandler stepped back and out of the way, his only contact with his girlfriend her hand in his own. The doctor explained a few things quickly that Chandler didn't catch, but assumed that Monica had, because she nodded intently and squeezed the hand that was holding his.

The next few minutes seemed to happen in slow motion. One moment, he was half-listening to the quick conversation between the two women, the next the only sound in the room was a quick but steady thud as another grainy image appeared on the screen.

God. That was it. That was his baby. Chandler was actually listening to his child's heartbeat and he was overcome with so much emotion that he had to grip the edge of the bed Monica was sat on to keep from collapsing altogether. The rest of the world was a blur; everything had narrowed down to the still tiny but much clearer image on the ultrasound screen and the constant _thrum thrum thrum_ of his baby's heartbeat.

" _Oh my god_ ," he breathed after a moment, when no one else had said anything. Monica's grip on his hand tightened, and he couldn't tell if the shaking was coming from her or him—most likely both of them.

"It's…" Monica choked out, emotion clouding her voice. Chandler couldn't blame her; he knew he was moments away from bursting into tears himself. Without moving his eyes from the screen, he moved closer to her again, pressing his mouth to her hair gently.

"It's real," he whispered. Tears clouded his vision and he squeezed his eyes shut, just taking in the sound of his child's heartbeat and the feel of his girlfriend breathing. "That's a real person in there."

"Uh huh," Monica sniffled. Doctor McKay must have left them alone for a while, because when Chandler blinked his eyes open again the two of them—three of them—were alone in the room, so he closed his eyes again and wrapped his arms fully around her waist, and they just listened.

* * *

Monica was quiet on the taxi ride home, but Chandler wasn't as worried as he had been that morning. He just held her hand and sat next to her in comfortable silence the entire way. His head was still buzzing, the _thump thump thump_ ringing in his ears as he thought about how incredibly surreal this all was. Elevven weeks along, Doctor McKay had said, almost a full trimester. In just six months there would be a baby. He was going to be a dad in six months. There was going to be a tiny person depending on him to keep it safe and alive; he'd never had a responsibility even close to that before.

He was scared, he could admit that. This was terrifying, and each day as it became more and more of a reality, the more he thought about all the ways he could mess it up. But no matter how scared he got, he knew he wouldn't run again. Couldn't. He meant every word when he had told Ross that he wanted to be here. He wanted to be with Monica. As long as he had her by his side, nothing seemed unmanageable. She kept him anchored, kept him calm. She was his rock, whether she knew it or not.

He felt a gentle tug on his hand, the one holding Monica's, and broke out of his thoughts to see that they were parked in front of their building. He pulled some cash from his back pocket to pay the taxi driver and waited for the change before helping Monica out of the cab and wrapping an arm around her waist to guide her up the stairs.

"Chandler, I'm pregnant, not an invalid," she protested, pushing weakly at his side but making no real effort to move away from him.

"I don't care," he grinned, kissing her hair as they walked. "You're my girlfriend, I'm gonna take care of you whether you like it or not."

"Well aren't you sweet," she teased back. She wouldn't admit it, but Chandler could tell that she was tiring much more quickly than she normally would just from climbing the flights of stairs to their apartments. Silently he shifted so that she was leaning on him more, and she didn't respond.

When they finally reached their level, they headed directly to Monica's apartment, where they were unsurprised to find the other four already hanging out.

"Hello children," Chandler greeted when the entered, and immediately they were swarmed by grabbing hands and questions of the afternoon's appointment. He ignored them all in favor of walking Monica to the couch and sitting down with her in his lap. Over the past few weeks it had become more natural to be affectionate in front of their friends; they had always been close, so it was just a matter of not second-guessing their every move anymore.

"Well?" Phoebe prompted as they got settled.

"Well what?" Monica responded with a teasing smile.

"Come on, Mon, how'd it go?" Rachel asked, sitting next to them on the couch, while Phoebe took the chair and the other two boys sat on the floor on the other side of the coffee table. There was a bowl of popcorn sitting on the table—somehow the group had managed to feed themselves in Monica's brief absence—and Monica reached for a handful. She offered a piece to Chandler, which he ate out of her hand, before finally addressing the others.

"It was fine," she shrugged. "The baby's healthy, I'm healthy."

"We heard the heartbeat," Chandler added.

"And Chandler cried!"

"You cried too!" Chandler argued.

"Yeah, but I'm all hormonal and stuff," Monica reasoned. "I have an excuse!"

"Yeah well…shut up," Chandler huffed. Monica turned and kissed his cheek, and he smiled back at her. She reached for another handful of popcorn, this time poking him on the nose with a piece before feeding it to him.

"Alright, let me up, I'm gonna pee, then get started on dinner," Monica said finally, tapping on his arms around her waist.

"No, no, hey, I can make dinner," Chandler protested.

"Not if we actually want to eat it, you can't," Monica returned, kissing him quickly before going to the bathroom while the rest of the group laughed at Chandler's defeated expression.

* * *

Dinner was a long affair, and all Chandler wanted was to curl up in bed next to his beautiful girlfriend and sleep for about three days. Unfortunately, he had a 9am meeting the next day so that wasn't possible, but he would settle for a solid eight hours. He helped Monica with the washing up when they had finished—she hadn't allowed him anywhere near the food preparation—in an effort to expedite the process, but the other four had set up camp in the living room and he knew Monica wouldn't want to go to bed until all her guests had left. As tired as he was, he could practically see the exhaustion radiating from her, and he really, _really_ wanted her to rest.

He said as much to her, and she shot him a look that was obviously meant to shut him up before he said anything to their friends. He returned the look with a raise of his eyebrow, trying to communicate his distrust of her judgement at the moment. She huffed and put down the plate she was washing, took the towel from his hands to dry her own, and wrapped her arms around his torso and looked into his eyes.

"Chandler, stop it," she scolded quietly. "I'm fine. I'm just a little tired, that's normal for the first trimester. Just give it a week or so and I'll be back to normal, okay?"

"Still," he protested. "If you're tired, you should rest. Stop fighting it. It's not your job to be strong right now, remember? Go get into bed, and I'll take care of the guys."

"Do you want to stay over tonight?" she asked.

"Always," he grinned, kissing her forehead. "Give me five minutes."

She nodded and quietly slipped from the room while Chandler turned to address the group seated around the coffee table, completely oblivious to the conversation in the kitchen.

"Mon and I are gonna head to bed," he interrupted whatever they had been talking about. Four heads turned towards him, Joey with a suggestive raise of his eyebrows. "Dude, no!" he exclaimed. "She's tired, I'm tired. I just wanted to say goodnight, and to tell you to keep it down out here. I mean it, she really needs to get some rest."

The others nodded, giving each other looks that Chandler couldn't quite decipher. He decided it wasn't worth it to question them at…not even ten at night. God, he must be getting old. Either way, he gave a salute before turning in the direction of Monica's bedroom. He quietly opened and closed the door, just in case Monica was sleeping already. As he approached the bed, Monica rolled over and leaned up on her elbow, reaching out for him with her other hand.

"Hi," she grinned when he was close enough for her to pull him in by his shirt.

"Hi yourself," he replied, pecking her on the lips as he knelt over her. She pulled him in for a deeper kiss as she ran her hands up his chest, pushing his shirt up with it. Chandler broke the kiss long enough to tug it all the way off while Monica did the same to her own. He leaned back down to kiss her again, rolling onto his side and pulling her close to him. He broke the kiss again and she turned her attention to his neck.

 _God_ it had been so long since they had done this and Chandler could feel himself getting hot already, just from a bit of kissing.

He rolled on top of her again and ran his hands down her sides to the top of her sweats. "You sure you wanna do this?" he asked, stroking her waist.

"Oh god yes," she giggled, meeting his lips again. Chandler didn't need to be told twice; he was only human after all.

Afterwards, Chandler lay with Monica's head on his chest, running his hand gently up and down her back. In that moment, he wanted nothing more than to stay there forever with her. Despite having so much to think about lately, one thing always at the forefront of his mind was _them_. Where were they? They hadn't really had that conversation since Monica had told him she was pregnant, and while Chandler liked to think they had grown closer over the past six or so weeks, he really didn't want to assume anything. All he knew was that he loved her, that he had never loved anyone as much as he loved her, and that he likely would never again love anyone as much as he loved her.

With all that considered, why shouldn't they start moving their relationship forward? They didn't have to get married right away; maybe they could try living together? He already stayed at her apartment more nights than not, might as well make it official right?

Or, what if she did want to get married now? Chandler certainly wouldn't be opposed. Sure, it was fast, but they were having a baby after all. Nothing about this relationship could be considered taking it slow. And he really did love her, more than anything in the world he loved her. When he pictured his future—which he had been doing a lot lately—she was always in it, right by his side. Did Monica see the same thing?

He realized that they really did need to talk about it again, make sure they were on the same page at the very least. If nothing else, to confirm that she's happy with where they are.

"Mon?" he asked softly.

"Hmmm," she responded, already starting to drift off. Chandler paused then shook his head.

"I love you," he whispered, abandoning his initial thought. Honestly, he hadn't even known what he was going to say, how he was going to begin. Ordinarily, post-sex would be the perfect time for such a serious talk, but Monica was tired, so tired Chandler was surprised she had wanted to do anything, and he wasn't exactly wide awake himself.

"Mmmm," she answered sleepily, and he kissed the top of her head before allowing himself to drift off to sleep as well. When he dreamed, he dreamed of the future, of the baby, and of her.

 **Feedback-both positive and constructive-makes me a happier and better writer!**


	7. Chapter 6

**Okayyyy here's another chapter! We're really starting to move the plot along here now...all the feedback from you guys had given me so much motivation to write; this is already the longest story I've ever written and I'm nowhere near done! So, thank you all so much for that, and PLEASE continue to leave me comments! Also, I've been meaning to mention that I have absolutely zero personal experience with pregnancy so everything I know is either from watching Friends or from the research I've done online for this story, so if I'm missing anything or something is very wrong, it's because I actually have no idea what I'm doing *shrugs*. Now, without further ado, here's chapter 6!**

"Aww, do you really have to go?" Chandler whined childishly as he pinned Monica against the counter. Phoebe and Rachel were sitting at the kitchen table snacking on some fruit and pretzels that she had set out, watching the exchange with a mixture of amusement and fondness.

"We can't all call in sick any time we want," she laughed, kissing him on the nose. "I'll be back late, so just come over first thing in the morning, okay?"

"How come you have to work late though?" he pressed. "Don't they know you have a needy boyfriend at home?" He grinned so that she would know he was joking—mostly—and she lightly smacked the side of his face.

"Believe it or not, they don't care," she teased back. "I'm actually gonna be late if I don't leave though."

"Fine," Chandler huffed. "Promise you'll call me if you need anything?"

"Always," she confirmed. She cupped his face in her hands and kissed him slowly. He pressed closer, trying to deepen it, but she pulled back, pushing him away with a hand to his chest. "I love you," she said quietly, blue eyes gazing intently into his own.

"I love you too," he smiled shyly. He stepped back to let her pass and helped her into her coat. With one more kiss, she was out the door, leaving Chandler smiling stupidly after her.

"Aww, you are so whipped," Phoebe teased from behind him. He shook his head before turning around to where the other two were still sitting at the table, eyebrows raised knowingly.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked casually, grabbing a YooHoo from the fridge and taking a drink.

"Oh come on, you still haven't stopped smiling," Rachel accused. "You're thinking about her right now, aren't you?"

"So what if I am?" Chandler asked, a note of defensiveness creeping into his tone.

"Oh, nothing, it's just sweet," Rachel dismissed, giving Phoebe a look, like they had all been giving each other the other night. He couldn't let it go this time.

"What? What is that?" he asked, looking between the two of them in frustration.

"Nothing!" Rachel exclaimed.

"It's not nothing!" Chandler argued. "That is not a nothing look, that is a something look, and I want to know what it is!"

"It's really not a big thing," Phoebe responded. "It's just…what's up with you guys?"

"What do you mean?" Chandler asked.

"You've only been going out for a few months, right? And now you're having a baby together, but you claim you're not that serious yet? Which is fine, except you do stuff like that," she nodded to the door, referring to their previous exchange. "And you totally are."

"Okay first of all, we never said we weren't serious," he corrected. "We are serious, really serious. We just said we didn't want to get married just because of the baby."

"So do you want to get married?" Rachel pressed.

"No!" Chandler exclaimed, putting his hands up in defense, before taking a breath and relaxing again. "I mean, it's so soon, right? We've been together barely seven months, we're not even living together. Marriage is so far in the future, it's not even a discussion right now!"

"So it is in the future then," Phoebe continued the questioning, and Chandler was getting a little embarrassed by the whole thing.

"I don't know, maybe," he shrugged, shy, playing with the now empty bottle in front of him on the table. "We really haven't talked about it."

"Chandler?" Rachel looked at him skeptically.

"I'm serious!" he defended, suddenly feeling very exposed, like he had revealed too much. "It's just not on the radar at the moment. We have other things to deal with. Can we be done talking about this now? Please?" The girls shared another look, this one vaguely sad, like they knew something he didn't. He would press, but that would likely lead back to the same conversation he just escaped, and he didn't want that.

With one more look back at Rachel and Phoebe—who were now deep in a quiet conversation, probably about him—he crossed the hall to his own apartment, someplace he had been spending very little time recently. Other than to change clothes and occasionally to shower, he spent all his time with Monica, usually electing to stay over at hers so he could be there for everything: the morning sickness, the late night cravings, the frequent massages that she needed to relax enough to sleep. He wanted to spend every moment with her, and with the baby. Not for the first time, he wondered whether they should try to move their relationship along.

He collapsed into his chair and ran his hands over his face. It wasn't supposed to be this complicated, was it? That's why they had had the discussion up front, so that there would be no confusion as to where they were months down the line. Yet here they were, ten weeks later, and Chandler honestly had _no clue_ where their relationship was going. How absurd is that? Baby on the way? No problem, piece of cake. Navigating the complexities of a serious relationship? Woah, look out. Was there something wrong with him? Was this just something he was freaking out over? If Monica was experiencing similar confusion, surely she would have said something, wouldn't she? He hadn't, obviously, but Monica was supposed to call the shots. She was the one who had had successful (or at least, relatively successful) relationships in the past, she knew what to do better than he did. If they needed to talk about something, she would bring it up. Which leads him back to this whole where-are-they fiasco being strictly a Chandler problem.

 _I'm such a screw up_ he thought to himself. _We said we were going to take our relationship slow, and that's what we're doing. You agreed to that. It's not her fault you might have changed your mind!_

And that was the terrifying part: he really thought he was ready for more. As much as he tried—and failed—to play cool while talking to the girls, he was itching to take their relationship to the next level, whatever that level may be. It probably was too soon for marriage, but there had to be _something_ they could do, something big to show themselves, and the others, just how serious they were. Something bigger than a baby, of course.

Problem was, he was absolute garbage at relationships, and had no idea how bring any of this to Monica's attention. In the past, whenever he was having girl problems, it was always Monica he would go to for guidance. He couldn't do that here, and he didn't really think that going to Phoebe and Rachel was an option, as anything he said would likely make it back to Monica anyways. And he knew better than to trust Joey or Ross with serious relationship advice.

Just then, the phone rang, startling him out of his thoughts. Slowly, he stood up and strode over to the counter and picked it up.

"Hello?" he answered.

"Hi, sweetie," came the unexpected response from the other end.

"Mon?" he asked. "Is everything okay?"

"Oh yeah, it's just a bit slow right now and I missed you," she responded casually, and Chandler felt his face heat up with happiness. _She missed him_. It had been—he looked at the clock—just over two hours and she already missed him too. It gave him home that maybe they were still on the same page.

"Aww, I miss you too, honey," he smiled, taking the phone to sit back down in his chair. "Slow night? Does that mean you'll be home early?"

"I wish," she laughed. "The dinner rush will probably start in less than an hour, and we'll be swamped until closing."

"Dammit," Chandler sighed. "You sure you don't want me to wait up for you?"

"Please don't," he could practically see her rolling her eyes. "Chandler, I mean it, I'll be tired, I won't want to talk to anyone anyways, and you have slept in your own apartment in over a week."

"So?" he huffed. He knew he was whining, and was definitely trying her patience, but he really, _really_ wanted to see her before the morning.

"Honey, we can survive a night apart," she reminded him. "We've been spending a lot of time together, it'll be good for us to slow down a bit, don't you think?"

"Oh, umm…" _Oh._ So not so much on the same page, then. "Yeah, yeah, you're right," he rushed. "I'll…see you tomorrow morning then?"

"I love you," she responded. "So much. You know that, don't you?"

"Yeah, I know," Chandler responded distractedly, because now every alarm in his head that could possibly be going off at the moment was on full blast, and he felt his entire world shift just enough to notice, and not in a good way. "I love you too."

He hung up the phone then, not waiting for any sort of goodbye, and let the device fall from his hand. Could he have misread their entire situation? She clearly wasn't as serious about them as he was, and wasn't it possible that she was only still with him because of the baby? That otherwise they'd have broken up weeks ago? All at once, every insecurity Chandler had previously stifled came back in full force until his head was full of _she doesn't love you, get out while you can, this is why you avoid commitment_.

Suddenly he was terrified. Terrified of losing her, terrified of being cut out and away from his child, terrified of losing all his friends in the process of all this. He needed…he didn't know what he needed, he needed Monica to walk through the door right now and tell him that she needed to be around him the same way he needed to be around her. She was like oxygen, and he could only hold his breath for so long.

He was being ridiculous, he knew. She was at work, he was going to see her the next morning before he went off to work, then would see her again when he got home in the evening and in all likelihood he'd end up staying the night again. They could survive one night apart, but her words were haunting him.

 _It'll be good for us to slow down a bit._

Slow what down, exactly? They were moving slower than any of his previous relationships (if you could even call them that). He knew that it had been for his benefit at first, that she hadn't wanted to scare him off with too much, too fast, and he appreciated that. But he thought he had made it clear that he didn't have those problems anymore. He couldn't imagine _Monica_ of all people suddenly having fears about commitment.

The apartment door opened, and Chandler looked up in time to see Joey enter with an unfamiliar blonde. He was so _not_ in the mood to deal with whatever Joey had planned for the night, so with only a nod of acknowledgement he retired to his bedroom. Even with the door closed, he could hear voices from the living room, so he flopped back on his bed—not bothering to undress—and pulled his pillow over his head. It could have been minutes or hours later that he finally fell into a dreamless, restless sleep, the knowledge that he'd get to see his girlfriend when he woke up the only thing keeping him from wallowing in misery for the entire night.

* * *

It was still dark out when Chandler woke up. Joey's room was quiet, so it must have been very late, or very early. He went to roll over and check his clock, but was startled by the figure sitting on the edge of his bed.

"Mon?" he whispered.

"Hey," she responded quietly. "Didn't mean to wake you."

"No, no, I'm glad you did," he groaned, sitting up and stretching his arms in front of him. "What's the matter?"

She shrugged and scooted closer to him, and he brought his arm up around her shoulders. "I guess…I don't sleep very well by myself anymore," she admitted. Chandler's heart lurched at the vulnerability in her voice and pulled her down to lie on top of him. She rested her head on his chest and draped an arm over his stomach as he gently ran a hand through her hair.

"I don't like sleeping without you either, honey," he soothed, kissing her forehead. "I'm so glad you came in here."

"Thank god," she sighed, and he smiled down at her fondly. Everything in his world suddenly fell back into place with her in his arms.

"Hey Mon?" he asked cautiously, worried that what he was about to say would cross some boundaries they weren't ready for.

"Hmm?"

"What you said earlier, that we're moving too fast…did you mean it?" He held his breath as he waited for her answer. She was silent for several moments before tightening her arm around his torso.

"I…I don't know," she spoke slowly. "I think I'm just overthinking everything right now. It's scary, with everything going on, and the way it sometimes feels like my body's rebelling against me, it just feels like I'm out of control, and I don't know what to do about that. So I'm just kind of…freaking out about everything really."

"Hey, hey, look at me," he encouraged, lightly brushing her cheek. Her blue eyes met his and he kissed her forehead. "It's just me, right? Don't freak out about me, talk to me."

"No, I know, you're right," she sighed. "You've been so good, you're making all this so easy for me and I don't even tell you that enough."

"Oh, c'mon no, don't cry," Chandler soothed, tucking his girlfriend's head under his chin and rocking them back and forth. "You're amazing, Monica. You are. I'm so lucky to be with you, okay? I love you so much, nothing could ever change that. I promise."

She nodded against his chest and he squeezed her tighter, pressing his mouth lightly against the top of her head.

"I'm sorry I'm such a mess right now," she sniffled after a few moments.

"Shhh, it's not your fault," he assured her gently. "You're pregnant, you know these mood swings are normal. Just relax, let me take care of you, like we said. You and me, okay?"

"You're so good to me," she mumbled again, running a hand gently along his side. "Thank you."

"Hey, what's a boyfriend for?" he smiled, lightly brushing his thumb across the side of her face. "You seem like you've been feeling better these last few days?"

"Start of the second trimester," she responded. "Apparently the next three months will be a bit more pleasant. I think the morning sickness is over, at the very least."

"Good," he said, pressing his forehead to the top of her head briefly. "I don't like it when you're miserable."

"Not miserable," she correctly. "But I'll definitely enjoy having some energy back for a while."

"Has it really been three months already?" Chandler asked incredulously. It really didn't seem like it had been that long. It was all still a little surreal to him, the thought of having a child of his own in a few months.

"Scary, isn't it?" Monica agreed. "We've still got a long way to go, though."

"God, we're gonna be parents in like six months," Chandler realized, sitting up slightly to look down at her. "Actual, real parents with a real kid. _That's_ scary."

"Do you actually think we can do this?" she asked seriously, meeting his eyes. "Like, are we gonna be good parents? What if I screw it up?"

"Mon, you're gonna be an amazing mother," Chandler assured her. "You're so natural with Ben, and you're gonna love this baby so much, you couldn't mess it up if you tried."

"Really?"

"I promise. We're gonna work all this out, okay? But not right now, it's late, and you need as much sleep as you can get." He felt her nod and relax in his arms, and he allowed himself to relax as well. With her next to him again, he wondered how he had ever managed to sleep alone. Being with her just felt _so right_ in every way possible, and he still had hope that she felt the same.

"You're thinking too loud," she mumbled sleepily, and he huffed out a laugh.

"Sorry babe," he kissed her forehead one more time and rolled them on their sides so he was spooning her from behind.

"Mmmm…night."

"Night Mon."

* * *

"So, someone didn't come home last night."

Chandler smirked into his coffee cup at Rachel's observation, but Monica never turned from the pan she was washing.

"I did come home," she responded simply. "I just left again."

"I see the night apart went well," Rachel continued as if she hadn't spoken, and now Monica switched off the water and turned around.

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked, and Chandler looked between the two girls in confusion, sensing that he had missed a conversation.

His suspicions were confirmed when Phoebe entered moments later and Rachel immediately announced to her, "Monica went over to Chandler's last night." Phoebe smirked and held out her hand, and Rachel placed what looked like a twenty dollar bill in it.

"What, did you guys _bet_ that we couldn't spend a night apart?" he finally joined the conversation.

"Later," Monica eyed him sternly, and Chandler nodded, taking another sip of his coffee.

"It's not a bad thing!" Phoebe protested. "It just means that—"

"Phoebe!" Monica interrupted, and shot Chandler another glare when he tried to speak up again. So it would be one of those days. "There's nothing wrong with us wanting to spend time together."

"Honey, we never said there was," Rachel responded. "We just said—"

"I'm going to get dressed," Monica inserted again. "Chandler, don't you need to get to work?"

He didn't, really (punctuality was not really something he prioritized when it came to his job), but he knew well enough that she wanted to get rid of him, likely to talk to Phoebe and Rachel alone, or at least ensure that they didn't talk to him. Whatever, if it was really important she would tell him later.

On his way out the door, he crossed paths with Joey, who was just waking up and on his way across the hall for his own breakfast.

"I wouldn't go in there," Chandler warned. "I think Mon's in a mood, and Rachel and Phoebe are there."

"But we don't have any food!" Joey whined. "What kind of date would I be if I sent a girl home hungry?"

"The kind that's not going to call back anyways?" Chandler reminded him, switching his briefcase to the other hand to share its weight.

"Okay, fair," Joey admitted with a shrug. "But what's going on in there?"

"I dunno man," Chandler shook his head. "Monica ended up spending the night last night, and apparently Phoebe and Rachel had a bet on if she would or not…they really aren't telling me anything honestly, and I know better than to ask."

"Oh I see how it is," Joey wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

"Dude, no!" Chandler exclaimed. "We just slept, we didn't do anything. We just like being together."

"Dude, do you two ever sleep apart anymore?" Joey asked.

"I'm allowed to spend the night with my girlfriend!" Chandler protested. "It makes up for the first five months when we never got to spend the night together."

"I'm just asking, no need to get all defensive!" Joey threw his hands up in surrender.

"Sorry," Chandler shook his head. "It just seems like lately our relationship has been a popular topic of discussion, and that's exactly what we didn't want to begin with."

"Hey man, I get it," Joey put a hand on his shoulder. "How about we invite Ross over tonight to watch the Knicks game, just us guys, no relationship talk," he suggested. Like that would ever happen.

"Sure," Chandler shrugged anyways. It had been awhile—probably since Ross had moved out over a month ago—since the three of them had had some real guy time.

"Sweet," Joey nodded. "See you when you get home man!" He the continued on into Monica and Rachel's apartment, and Chandler just shook his head as he turned towards the stairs. He could call Monica when he got to his office, see if she wanted to meet up for lunch, then spend the evening with the girls. Maybe tonight would be the night they actually slept apart. If their friends were going to place bets on their relationship, the least he could do was make it interesting.

 **As always, feedback-positive or constructive-is greatly appreciated and makes me update faster!**


	8. Chapter 7

**Hi, I'm back! Sorry this update took so long, I'm studying abroad this semester and have basically spent the last two weeks either packing or travelling so I haven't had much time to write! A bit of a shorter chapter here, but honestly this was the best place I could think of stopping and I really wanted to get you guys another chapter ASAP. Things are starting to move along now! As always, thank you to everyone who has reviewed so far, you motivate me to keep this story going!**

"Hi, honey," Monica greeted him with a kiss as she sat next to him on the orange couch of the coffeehouse. It was lunchtime, and Chandler had spent the better part of the morning in meetings—his least favorite part of his job.

"Mmmm, how was your morning?" he asked, wrapping an arm loosely around her shoulder and resting his other hand on her stomach as he so often did lately. "Wait…can you feel that?"

"Feel what?"

"That," he rubbed his hand lightly over her lower abdomen. "There's a bump there! There totally is, oh my god!"

"Chandler, there's nothing there," Monica shook her head with a smile. "Don't you think I'd be able to feel it if there was?"

"Apparently not because I'm _telling_ you, that is a baby bump! How can you not feel it?" Chandler was absolutely in awe. _Holy shit that's my baby_.

"And _I'm_ telling you there's nothing there," she argued, grabbing his hand. "Soon, though."

"Whatever, I know I'm right," Chandler huffed, leaning back against the couch. "Anyways, so I had an idea."

"Oh yeah?"

"Okay, so Joey wants to have a guys' night tonight. You could have the girls over? Maybe try to spend tonight apart?" he suggested. Monica raised her eyebrows.

"I thought you didn't want to try sleeping apart anymore?" she asked with a fond smile.

"Well that was before I found out they were betting on us!" he protested.

"Since when are you Mister Competitive?" she poked his cheek, causing him to laugh softly and kiss her lips.

"I guess you just bring it out in me, baby," he teased, and kissed her again.

"Hey, hey, hey, in public you gotta be doing that?" Joey complained, covering his eyes as he sat down at the table to their right.

Chandler shrugged. "I won't apologize for kissing my girlfriend."

"Aww, you're sweet," Monica cooed, kissing him again.

"Seriously you guys," Joey whined.

"Okay, okay," Chandler surrendered, Monica settling back against his chest. "Have you asked Ross about coming over tonight?"

"Oh, did you want me to do that?" Joey asked.

"Well, considering that I've been at work all day, I was hoping you'd take some initiative."

"I'll call Ross," Monica cut in, before they could start going back and forth. "I have to let Phoebe and Rachel know what the plan is anyways."

"Thank you sweetie," Chandler smiled, kissing the side of her head, then sticking his tongue out at Joey before he could comment on the display of affection. "Oh hey, Rach," he greeted as she took a seat in the armchair on their other side.

"Rachel! We're having dinner at ours tonight with Phoebe," Monica informed her.

"Oh…okay," Rachel replied, looking at her curiously. Chandler shook his head and smiled. Everyone in their group knew well enough by now that when Monica planned something, that's what was happening. "Why?"

"You'll spend all night talking about me, I'm sure," Chandler teased, and Monica shifted to mock-glare up at him.

"You wish, Bing," she responded. They held each other's eyes for a moment in what had become a mini-staring competition, and neither of them liked losing. Finally, Chandler caved and leaned down to kiss her lips, much to Joey's displeasure and Rachel's amusement.

"I have to go soon," Chandler murmured, so that only Monica could hear. "Unless I get called to something last minute I want to get out of there by four today. I could stop by before dinner?"

"I'd like that," she responded just as quietly. "I'll see you in a few hours. I love you."

"I love you too," he responded, then a little louder, "And I love you," he patted her stomach where there was definitely a bump, no matter what Monica believed.

"Okay, get out of here," she laughed, lightly slapping at his arm.

"Later, children," Chandler waved to the other two and stood when Monica sat up to let him go.

As he left the coffeehouse, he smiled fondly thinking of the beginning of their relationship. Not the sneaking around, but that early phase when all they wanted was to have sex all the time, when the most difficult part of the secret was keeping their hands off each other. They used to spend their lunch breaks in one of their apartments—or that one thrilling time in the closet of Central Perk—in a competition to see how many times they could go in the hour before they had to go back to work. It had been so exciting to have a relationship with that much passion; it was like nothing Chandler had experienced with any of his previous girlfriends.

But now, they were just a _couple_. And as weird as it seemed, Chandler thought he liked this even better. They no longer desperately sought out a place to have sex whenever they had a free minute. They didn't even have sex every day now, and that was weirdly okay. Just as thrilling to him was cuddling while watching a movie, or holding hands and going for a walk, or meeting their friends at Central Perk and just _being together_. It was just so normal, something Chandler honestly expected to find in a relationship. No matter how much time they spent together, he couldn't get enough.

It was thoughts like these that made Chandler seriously consider a future with her. He was never _that guy_ ; no matter how serious he got with someone, the concept of forever just seemed like a far off fantasy to deal with later. But he'd known Monica for ten years now and had considered her one of his best friends for most of that time. They knew everything about each other before they started dating; no one knew how screwed up he really was like she did, yet here she was. Chandler didn't expect to find that again.

And now there was the baby on top of all that. So Chandler agreed that they shouldn't be together or live together or get married just because she was pregnant. But the more he thought about it, the more he realized it wasn't like that at all. He loved her more than he'd ever loved anyone. He really wanted to be with her forever. Seven months was too soon to get married, but maybe soon? Seven months wasn't far away from a year, and a year was good, right? People got engaged after dating for a year. He could do that. That would be around Monica's due date, he realized. Wow. They would have a baby after dating for a year.

Chandler was snapped out of his thoughts by people pushing around him trying to get on the subway. Now wasn't the time to think about all this, and Chandler wished he had someone to talk about all this with.

* * *

"Dude, will you just sit down? The game's about to start!" Joey whined, and Chandler rolled his eyes. He felt inexplicably tense; it was the first time he had spent any length of time with just the other two guys—since Ross moved out a few months ago, probably, before any either of them knew about him and Monica. They had agreed to spend the night talking about anything but his relationship with Monica—and the baby by extension—but Chandler knew better. Joey and Ross could be just as nosy as the girls when they wanted to be.

From the living room, Joey cheered as the Kincks won the tipoff, and Chandler took a seat on one of the stools at the counter, since Ross was in his usual chair. As silly as it sounded, he felt like the division was a physical manifestation of his isolation from them. In the past they wouldn't have had to schedule a guys' night, it was just something that happened. They'd go to a game, or watch one from home, or go out for drinks. Everything was different now; they all knew it. It was different than just having a girlfriend, and it was _way_ different than when Carol was pregnant with Ben. For one, Monica was still his girlfriend; it was his number one priority to be there at all times, no matter what. As much as he hated missing out on everything, Ross had also missed out on a lot of the responsibility that came with. Chandler wasn't just attending the doctor's appointments, he was running out in the middle of the night when she wanted fried chicken at 2am, he was holding her hair and rubbing her back when she got morning sickness during the first trimester, he was giving her massages, talking her down when she got emotional. Hell, he was sitting here on a guys' night drinking orange juice instead of beer because he had given up alcohol in solidarity for the duration of the pregnancy. Not even four months in, and it was already the most rewarding experience of Chandler's life.

"That was a terrible call!" Ross exclaimed. He turned around. "Dude, are you even watching? You haven't said a word!"

"Yeah, this is supposed to be a guys' night!" Joey added. "Stop thinking about your girlfriend for a little while and watch the game with us!"

Chandler smiled and shook his head. Like it was that easy, like he could just _stop thinking about Monica_. He didn't disagree, though, and turned at least some of his attention to the TV. It only took two minutes after that for Ross to start rambling that he had given up a career in basketball to become a paleontologist and another thirty seconds before Chandler threatened to throw the remote at his head. From then it was almost normal, like they were three guys just hanging out and watching a game. They mostly talked about the game, commenting on the opposing players and refs and who would make the playoffs this year and it was all so _easy_. He had missed it.

Too easy.

At halftime, Joey stood up to grab another beer and tossed one to Ross before turning to Chandler.

"Want one?" he asked.

Chandler shook his head and held up his glass. "No, but could you pass the orange juice?"

"You're really not drinking?" Joey pressed.

"Nope," Chandler responded. "Not until the baby comes, at least. We'll talk to the doctor about breastfeeding when the time comes, but I'm not drinking again until Mon can."

"Okay, one, TMI," Ross shook his head in disgust. "And two, what are you doing?"

"What am I doing about what?" Chandler gulped down the rest of his glass before refilling it with the bottle Joey passed him.

"You, and-and my sister!" Ross exclaimed. "You-you're like a couple, but you're not? Like, seriously dude, what are you doing?"

"We are definitely a couple," Chandler responded, gazed fixed on the halftime show even though he had no real interest in what they were saying. "And I thought we weren't talking about this tonight."

"We're not," Joey agreed. "But come on, man, you never tell us anything anymore!"

"What are you talking about, I tell you everything!" Chandler argued.

"Not the real stuff!" Joey complained. "Come on, man, we wanna know!"

"You don't want to know, you just want to be nosy," Chandler responded, still pretending to be interested in the TV. He was so _not_ in the mood for this tonight. He really had wanted one normal night, without dealing with the constant questioning that he already got from the girls daily. Was that really so much to ask?

Apparently yes, because neither Joey nor Ross seemed likely to give up, Joey even going so far as to turn off the TV to get Chandler to look at him. That certainly got Chandler's attention.

" _What_ , okay? What could _possibly_ be so important that we can't spend _one night_ not talking about this," he caved.

"So what's going on with you two?" Joey grinned and bounced childishly.

"You already know what's going on with us," Chandler reminded him. "It's not like it's some big secret." _Anymore, anyways,_ he added to himself.

"Straight answer: are you getting married or not?" Ross cut in.

"We're…not," Chandler responded slowly. Hell, if only _he_ knew the answer to that one. "It's complicated, I guess."

"You got my sister pregnant, what could possibly be so complicated about that?" Ross asked.

"It's…I don't know," Chandler sighed. "I asked her if she wanted to, and she doesn't. Just the other day she said that we're moving too fast, and that we should slow down a bit. I don't even know what to think."

"Yeah, sure, _after_ getting pregnant is the time to slow down," Joey huffed.

"It's because it's all happening so fast!" Chandler defended her. "Can you blame her? Everything is changing, she doesn't want to change too much at once. It's good this way, it'll give us the chance to date for a while, then who knows," he shrugged.

"You keep saying that Monica doesn't want to get married," Ross spoke up after a pause. "Which is...so weird, by the way. But what about you?"

"What about me?" Chandler gulped.

"Do you want to get married? Like, baby thing aside, do you want to marry her?"

"I…" Chandler hesitated. "Yeah, I do," he admitted. "I'm so crazy about her, and I know I'll never feel this way about anyone else. I mean, if things were different and we weren't having a baby, I probably wouldn't even be thinking of this, but we are. We are, and it's, like, the _best_ thing to ever happen to me. It's just…" he took a breath and ran his hands over his face. "It's _Monica_ , y'know? She's everything. I just want to make her happy, and if that means we don't get married, or we wait, or whatever she wants, then…that's how it's gonna be. Okay? Happy?"

The other two were dead silent, but Chandler couldn't bring himself to look at them, keeping his gaze focused on the half-empty cup of juice in his hands. He didn't know how he felt having all that out in the open. He wasn't used to being so vulnerable, but he just had to tell _someone_. A weight had been lifted off of him for sure, but in its place was a sense of dread that they wouldn't understand, or that they would laugh at him, or that Ross would be angry. He didn't know what to expect and that scared him.

"I'm just…I'm gonna go to bed," he said after a moment of silence. "Tell me how the game turns out tomorrow."

"Chandler, wait," Ross stopped him before he had gone more than a few paces. He turned back to meet two sympathetic gazes and heaved out a shaky breath of relief. "Is…is that true? What you just said?"

"No, Ross, I've had that scripted out for weeks just in case we had this very conversation," Chandler huffed, rolling his eyes.

"That's…I had no idea, man," Ross shook his head.

"Yeah, well," Chandler rubbed the back of his neck, suddenly very uncomfortable with the whole situation. "I'm just gonna…" He pointed vaguely in the direction of his room, and retreated without another word from any of them. Some guys' night that had turned out to be.

Chandler had just flooped down backwards on his bed when there was a quick knock at his door, and not a second later Ross poked his head in.

" _What?_ " Chandler sighed.

"I know…I know Monica's my sister, and it's my job to be a little protective of her, but you're my best friend," he started, and Chandler shifted up on his forearms so he could look Ross in the eye for this conversation. "I've known you for a long time and I've never seen you feel like this about someone. I don't want to see either of you get hurt. That includes you. So be careful, okay? Don't hurt her, but try not to let her hurt you either?" He looked so serious that Chandler had to huff out a laugh.

"I'll do my best big guy," he responded. "Night."

"Night," Ross responded before turning and closing the door behind him as he left. Chandler stared at the ceiling for a long time. _Don't let her hurt you_. Yeah, it might be too late for that, because if anything ever happened, if she ever left him for any reason, Chandler honestly didn't think he'd survive.

 **So there's that! Thought? Compliments? Criticisms? Anything you want to see happen in this story? Leave me a review!**


	9. Chapter 8

**Waddup people? I'm back with chapter 8! This took me a bit longer than expected because life is a thing, but fortunately I have a lot of love for this story, so I'll always make time to write. As always, this is unedited because I'm lazy. Slight warning for some sexy times in this chapter, but nothing too graphic! Thank you SO MUCH to everyone who has reviewed this story so far, especially those of you who have reviewed every chapter...I'm continually blown away by the fact that people actually like reading what I write. I've gotten DMs from multiple people on Instagram asking for updates, and it just makes me so happy every time! So here you go, and please continue to let me know what you think of this story!**

"Okay, _now_ do you believe me?"

They were all sitting in Central Perk, a relatively rare occurrence these days with all of them so busy. Chandler had Monica tucked under his arm with the other hand resting on her stomach, which now _definitely_ had a visible bump.

"Okay, whatever," Monica rolled her eyes and pretended not to look, but anyone could see the smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. Chandler knew she was excited too—of course she was—she just didn't want to admit that he was right.

"Hey, kiddo," Chandler cooed, rubbing his hand softly over the bulge. "Everything okay in there? You comfortable? Mommy keeping you fed? It's a tough world out here, you're gonna need your strength."

"Chandler!" Monica scolded.

"Dude, are you kidding?" Ross scoffed.

"Oh come on, Ross. When Carol was pregnant you spent an hour talking to her stomach about dinosaurs, then sang the Monkees theme song!" Chandler reminded him, causing the girls to laugh out loud and Ross to glare at him. "At least I'm teaching my baby something!"

"Teaching them what a weirdo their father is, maybe," Monica huffed, running a hand through Chandler's hair. He pouted, and she kissed him in apology.

"I gotta say," Rachel began. "I never really saw you getting on board with all this, Chandler."

"Yeah," Phoebe agreed. "We thought that by now you would have freaked out and run for the hills or something."

"Oh, come on," Chandler argued. "What have I ever done that would make you guys think I wouldn't be cool with this?"

Monica raised her eyebrows. "Um, honey?"

"Okay, whatever," Chandler rolled his eyes. "But that was all before! I'm a totally different person now. I'm practically a grown-up."

"Chandler, you're thirty," Monica reminded him. "If that's not a grown-up, what is?"

"Don't argue with me, Geller," he warned, mock-glaring at her before allowing his expression to soften and kissing her on the forehead. Joey groaned in disgust in the background, but Chandler was too caught up in Monica's smile to care about what the other four were saying or doing. "I've been good though, right?" he asked quietly. "I've been mature and responsible and a good boyfriend, haven't I?"

Monica laughed. "Oh sweetie, you've been amazing," she responded, lightly brushing her hand across his cheek. He caught it and took it in his own, bringing it to his lips for a kiss before resting their joined hands on her still-mostly-flat-but-not-completely-flat stomach.

Chandler felt her breath hitch as he flattened their palms—his hand covering hers—over the small bump. He knew she could feel it too, and it just felt like such an incredible _moment_ for the two of them, like the rest of the world ceased to exist and they were alone with their baby. Their _family_. Suddenly all Chandler wanted was to get away from everyone else, to take Monica upstairs and hold her and touch her and be with only her.

She must have read his mind, because she leaned in close so that the others couldn't hear and whispered, "wanna get out of here?" Chandler had never agreed with something so much in his life. He was tempted to pick her up and throw her over his shoulder just to get up there fasted, but he knew she wouldn't appreciate that in this situation, so he held his composure as best he could as she stood up, pulling him up with her by their joined hands. With a quick, "we're gonna take off," Monica led him quickly from the coffee house towards the staircase that would take them to their apartments.

"I hope Rachel knows not to come up here," Chandler commented as he closed the door to Monica's apartment behind them, pulling her close for a kiss.

"I don't even care right now," Monica mumbled against his lips. Chandler huffed out a laugh as he kissed her back, finally giving in to the urge to pick her up and lifting her by the thighs. She wrapped her legs around his waist as he did so, and without breaking the kiss he started walking them towards the bedroom.

He kicked the door closed behind them—at least they knew for sure that Rachel wouldn't come in there—before depositing her on the bed and climbing on top of her.

"Not gonna be able to do that for much longer," Monica commented. "Pretty soon I'll be too heavy to carry."

"I'll make it work," Chandler responded, running his hands under her sweater and lifting it up to her armpits. She sat up just enough for him to pull it off her all the way, and unhooked her bra while he was at it. "Want you all the time, Mon," he breathed. "So gorgeous." He started kissing down her body until he reached her stomach, where he stopped. "Okay, kiddo, you might wanna cover your ears for this next part."

"Chandler!" Monica laughed, pulling him back up to lie fully on top of her. "Don't make it weird."

"Not weird," he responded, kissing her again and again, until anything else she may have wanted to say was gone from her mind.

He held her close as their bodies moved together; they were in no rush, and honestly Chandler would have been just as happy to lie quietly next to her, as long as she was with him. When they had finished, he rolled over so that she was lying on top of him now.

"God bless the second trimester," she giggled, running her hand gently over his chest.

"Give me a minute to, like, live," he panted with a grin, pulling her closer with an arm around her waist. "God, if this is how it's gonna be for the next few months, you just might kill me."

"You'll be fine," Monica rolled her eyes. "Ready to go again?"

Chandler groaned loudly and Monica giggled. "I swear to god, Mon," he moaned and she started kissing his neck. "Seriously, babe, I'm gonna need like _at least_ ten minutes."

"Fine," Monica huffed, flopping onto her back. "At least shower with me then? I'm gonna be hungry in like fifteen minutes."

"Let's go," Chandler caved with a tired chuckle, allowing his girlfriend to lead him to the bathroom. He had to admit, showering with his significant other had never been something he found particularly appealing; he needed his space sometimes, and the shower was one place he could be alone. With Monica, though, he couldn't get enough. When they had started out, they spent nearly the full 48 hours before Rachel returned from her impromptu trip to Greece in Monica's apartment, having sex on every surface they could think of. His brain had basically been mush when Monica had herded him into the shower one evening, too tired to remember why he should protest, and it ended up being the best shower he had ever had.

Rachel wasn't in the living room when they passed through—which was definitely for the best, as neither of them had bothered to put anything on—so within minutes they were standing together under the hot spray. There was nothing sexual about this shower; Chandler was still too tired for that (he must be getting old, he thought with a shudder). Gently and carefully, he lathered shampoo into her dark hair, taking great care not to tug on any tangles.

Monica was quiet as he helped her rinse the soap out of her hair, and he kissed her shoulder to get her attention.

"You okay, honey?" he asked quietly, wrapping his arms around her waist. With no clothes separating them, he could clearly feel the bump under his hand and he couldn't get enough. He could stand here like this forever, with the two most important things in the world wrapped in his arms, but for once, he felt no urgency. There were no thoughts of the future or marriage clouding him mind. He was sure it would come up again, but in that moment his entire world shrunk down to the three of them in that shower, and he knew that no matter how they got there, that was how it would always be.

"Hmmm? Yeah," she breathed, leaning back against him and covering his hands with her own. "Just…really good."

Chandler smiled against her shoulder and kissed it again, rocking the two of them back and forth as the steady stream of water pounded gently down his back. It was starting to go cold, but he hardly noticed. As cheesy as it sounded, he always felt warm with her; she was literally his sun.

"I'm hungry," she announced suddenly, and Chandler smiled.

"Whatever you want, baby," he responded. He quickly rinsed the rest of the soap off of her before moving her out of the way of the water so that he could wash himself quickly. Monica grabbed them each a towel and poked her head out the door to make sure no one had come in the apartment before they scurried back to her room. Chandler changed back into the clothes he had been wearing before, but when he turned around he saw Monica pulling on one of his sweatshirts that he'd left here and was overcome with fondness. It was entirely too big for her, but she looked so cozy and soft that all he could do was close the distance between them and wrap his arms tightly around her, face buried in her wet hair.

"Oh, hello," she laughed, returning the hug.

"I like when you wear my clothes," he mumbled, squeezing her tight.

"Well, good thing I like wearing them then," she responded, leaning back to smile up at him.

"Good thing," Chandler repeated, pecking her lips quickly. "Now I remember something about you being hungry?"

"Yes!" Monica exclaimed, pulling away from the embrace, and Chandler followed her into the kitchen.

"What'll it be today?" he asked, opening the fridge. Obviously she was more than capable of getting her own food—much more capable than he was, by any stretch—but she rarely craved anything more complicated than a sandwich so he could usually manage, and he liked taking care of her.

"Hmmm," she thought. "Just start grabbing stuff, I'm sure there's something that I like here."

"Yes ma'am," Chandler replied and began unloading the fridge: lunch meats, cheese, carrots, orange juice, leftover lasagna. Monica reached for the orange juice but put it back just as quickly.

"Not today," she shook her head. "What kind of ice cream do we have? Any of the good stuff?"

Chandler opened the freezer. "Cookie dough?" he asked.

"Gimme," Monica held out her hands and Chandler tossed the carton to her. He grabbed a spoon but didn't bother with a bowl; odds were good that she would finish it all anyways. After she had dug into her ice cream, he fixed himself a sandwich and sat down at the table next to her.

"Do you need anything else?" he asked. "I was gonna make a grocery run later; Joey and I are down to pop tarts and not much else. I can pick you up anything you need."

"Aww, that's so sweet," Monica cooed, rubbing his arm. "I can come with you, if you want."

Chandler raised an eyebrow skeptically. "You don't trust me doing your grocery shopping, do you?" he asked. She avoided eye contact. "Mon, I promise I'll buy exactly what you tell me to buy. You have to get used to me doing things for you! Once the baby comes you won't always have time to go out yourself, you have to let me handle some stuff, okay?" She shrugged, still looking away. "Do you want to come with me this time and train me on how to do it?" he smirked.

"Yes?" she asked shyly.

"Done," he responded, patting her hand and standing up. "I'm gonna go change clothes, you let me know when you're ready to go okay? You'll be okay on your own for a few minutes?"

"I'm not a child," she rolled her eyes with a huff, then stopped him with a gentle hand on his. "Thanks for…knowing me so well. And for being so understanding."

Chandler smiled and bent down to kiss the top of her head. "Love you," he said. "See you in a bit." He held his hand out for a high five, then strolled out of the apartment with one more glance over his shoulder.

* * *

Chandler panted loudly as he dropped their bags on Monica's kitchen table. Rachel and Joey were sitting on the couch watching TV and looked up when they entered.

"Got enough hands there?" Joey asked, but made no move to get up and help. Chandler glared at him and Monica rolled her eyes.

"He won't let me carry anything," she complained, starting to unload the bags that he had set down, and separating them into things that stayed at hers and ones that belonged across the hall.

"Of course I won't!" Chandler argued. "First off, I'm a gentleman," Rachel and Joey scoffed at that but Chandler chose to ignore them. "And no girlfriend of mine should have to lug crap around. And second of all, we've been over this! You're pregnant, you should be resting and letting me do stuff for you. If you won't let me do the shopping for you, at the very least I should be doing the manual labor."

Monica rolled her eyes. "Hey, I'm not _that_ pregnant yet," she countered. "I still go into work, I can carry a few bags upstairs."

"Shhh," he responded with a smile. "As long as you're around me, you're not doing anything."

"Whatever makes you happy, big guy," she patted his cheek as she worked around him, putting all the food in its place. "Now, you wanna be helpful? Take your stuff across the hall and put it away. Not just on the counter!" she added when it looked like he was going to jump in.

"You're the boss," he responded sarcastically, and she made a face back at him as he grabbed the bags containing the (limited) food he had bought for himself and Joey.

When the door had closed behind him, Joey spoke up. "So, what'd you guys do today?" he asked with a knowing grin.

"Joey!" Rachel exclaimed. "So?"

"Seriously?" Monica protested, and the other two just shrugged and nodded. "I'm not answering that."

"So, sex," Joey responded.

"I said I'm not answering that."

"What aren't you answering?" Chandler inserted as he reentered the apartment.

"That you two spent the afternoon having sex," Rachel answered.

"It wasn't the whole afternoon," Monica mumbled. Chandler grinned and stood behind her so he could wrap his arms around her waist. It was addicting, being able to physically feel his baby inside her, and he found he couldn't go more than a few minutes without feeling for the bump.

"Only because I'm not as young as I used to be," he added, kissing her cheek when she tried to pull away in irritation. "Can hardly keep up with this one."

"Chandler!" she huffed, this time succeeding in pulling away from his embrace.

"What? It's the pregnancy! Be proud of it!"

She rolled her eyes and stuck her tongue out at him, which he reciprocated. In general, they didn't talk about their sex life with their friends, it was true, but in the past it had been something they all did. Hell, on more than one occasion Chandler had gone to other members of their group—particularly Monica—for advice about sex. It was something they did, and while it being the two of them made it a little different, he didn't see why they couldn't still have a bit of fun. Besides, it's not like Ross was here; it was just Joey and Rachel.

"Real mature, guys," Rachel chastised, so naturally Chandler stuck his tongue out at her too. "Are you making dinner, Mon?"

"Yeah, are quesadillas good with everyone?" she responded absentmindedly as she moved around the kitchen, pulling out various meats and vegetables for anyone who might stop by.

"Need any help, baby?" Chandler asked migrating closer to her again.

"You can help by staying the hell out of my way is what you can do," Monica snapped and Chandler flinched at her tone. He smiled tightly and retreated to the living room, hoping the other two didn't notice his hurt at her dismissal. He was only trying to help, after all, but he tried to remind himself that she was under a lot of stress, certainly more so than she let on. She thrived on control, and he couldn't imagine how out of control she must have felt lately. She had had a relatively easy pregnancy so far, according to Doctor McKay, and he was _so_ thankful for that, but that didn't mean everything was easy. Her mood swings had continued past the first trimester, and she was already preparing to take time off work starting in a few months, which he knew she hated to do. Couple all that with the anxiety that goes along with expecting a child, and Chandler thought she was handling everything incredibly well.

The one thing that bothered him was how reluctant she still seemed to confide in him. It was strange, she had never had a problem venting to him before they were together, but now that he should be the one person she confides in above anyone else, it seemed like she was holding back and Chandler couldn't for the life of him understand why. She had to know that he was there for her, that he _wanted_ to be there for her, so why wasn't she allowing him to be? It hurt, if he was honest. It hurt a lot. But if this was what she needed, to be self-sufficient for as long as she could, then that's what he would give to her. She called the shots anyways; anyone who knew them knew who wore the pants in the relationship.

He refused to let her pull away, though. No matter how many times she snapped at him, no matter how much it may seem like she tried to push him away, whenever she needed him, he would be right there, because he loved her.

Dinner was just the four of them, and the other three drove most of the conversation. This was much more usual than it had been before, and Chandler really believed he had Monica to thank for that. Never before had he felt so comfortable with himself as he had since being with her, to the point where he no longer felt it necessary to interject with witty, inappropriate comments at random. He had been using humor as a defense mechanism for so long that just stepping back and observing felt unbelievably freeing.

Joey left right after dinner for a date, and Monica get started right away on cleanup. Chandler tried to help, and breathed a sigh of relief when she handed him a towel to dry the dishes. Rachel retreated to her room—probably to avoid being roped into helping—leaving just the two of them in the kitchen.

"Are you tired?" he asked as they worked.

"Why?" she responded instead of answering.

"Just didn't know what you wanted to do after we finish up here," he replied gently.

"Did you have something in mind?"

"No, no, I was honestly just wondering," he said defensively.

"How about you go get ready for bed?" she suggested. "I'm almost done here."

Chandler almost opened his mouth to protest, but conceded with a sigh and put down the towel.

"Want me to stay here tonight?" he asked carefully. She stopped at that.

"Honey, I always want you to stay over here. If you want to, that is."

Chandler nodded quickly and rushed across the hall to change into sweats and brush his teeth. _Nothing's changed_ he reminded himself. It was just like any other night, of course she still wanted to be with him. He shook his head to clear it was he ran his washcloth over his face. He was only gone for a few minutes, but by the time he returned to Monica's, the kitchen and living room were empty and her bedroom door was closed. He flicked off the lights in the living area and knocked gently on the door before opening it and slipping in.

The only light in the room was the lamp on her nightstand. Monica was dressed in a t-shirt—another item of his clothing that had migrated over here—and her own sweatpants, already under the covers and half asleep. Chandler was awestruck by just how gorgeous she was.

"Hey beautiful," he whispered, crossing the floor and climbing into bed beside her. Immediately, she rolled to rest her head on his shoulder and drape an arm across his chest. Instinctively, Chandler wrapped his own arms around her.

"Hi," she whispered sleepily. "To answer your earlier question, I guess I am pretty tired."

Chandler smiled down at her fondly. "Yeah, I can see that. Good thing we're going to sleep then, isn't it?"

"Mhm," she mumbled. "Chandler?"

"Yeah honey?"

"I'm sorry, about earlier," she said quietly. Her eyes were still closed, and she seemed to be on the verge of sleep, but her words were clear. "I shouldn't have snapped at you like that. I know you're just trying to help, and you have been. You've been amazing. I'm just stressed, all the time, and it's not fair for me to take it out on you."

"Shhh, you can take it out on me as much as you need, Mon," he whispered. "Anything, anytime, okay? I can't imagine how hard this has been for you. Whatever you need."

"I love you so much," she nuzzled into his neck and Chandler felt so warm and peaceful from that one simple action.

"I love you too Monica," he responded, kissing the side of her head. He held her tightly until her breathing evened out to signal that she had fallen asleep. Gently, he trailed one of his hands down to her stomach to rest on the bump. "Good night, kiddo," he whispered. "Daddy loves you very much."

Chandler fell asleep with a smile on his face.

 **Soooo there it is! If you thought this story would be angst-free, you were sorely mistaken and lemme tell you, there will be more angst in the future (don't hate me). Like it? Hate it? Have a suggestion for the future of this story, or for potential future stories? Leave me a review! Also, if you don't already, hmu on Instagran supernatural_mondler and twitter spn_mondler...I like making friends so seriously, come be my friend!**


	10. Chapter 9

**Hi, remember me? Honestly I didn't realize it had been so long since I updated until late last week when I checked, and saw that it had been almost 3 weeks? Yikes. In my defense, I spent a few weekends travelling and didn't bring my laptop! Hopefully this monster of a chapter makes up for it! As always, thank you SO much to everyone who has left me comments-here, on Instagram, and on Sarahah-and I BEG you to continue to do so! I love hearing your thoughts, and it motivates me to keep writing!**

 **I'm pretty sure this chapter alone is longer than any other individual story I've ever completed (I wasn't kidding when I said it was a monster) but I didn't want to break it up, so here, have 6.5k words!**

"Hi honey," Chandler greeted, strolling into apartment 20 after a long day of work. "Hi baby."

Monica rolled her eyes as Chandler ran his hand over her ever-growing baby bump but accepted his kiss and allowed him to wrap an arm around her waist.

"How was your day?" she asked.

"Boring, long," he shrugged. "Missed you guys."

"Aww, we missed you too, didn't we baby?" she gently ran a hand down her own stomach, twining her fingers with Chandler's there. Chandler beamed with fondness, looking at their joined hands in awe. He felt her lean back into him and tightened his arm around her waist.

"I was thinking," he began softly, "it's been a while since we've been out, just us. What do you say I take you out for a nice dinner tonight? We could go to that Italian place you love, introduce small stuff to the world of fancy pasta."

Monica sighed. "Sweetie, I'd love to, but I got called in for the dinner shift tonight. I have to leave in less than an hour."

Chandler deflated, but tried not to let it show. Monica's job was important to her; he knew that and understood that. The last thing he wanted was to make her feel bad about something she loved so much. But it was a Friday night, and she had worked at least one shift every day this week, including back-to-back lunch and dinner shifts yesterday. She deserved a night off, a night to rest, preferably with him.

He didn't voice any of that out loud, however. Her work was hers, not his, and if she wanted to go in, there was nothing he could say to change that. Besides, she would be cutting back on hours soon to get ready for the baby and frankly they could use the money. Individually, they were two of the more financially secure members of their group, especially with Ross's recent anger management issues, but bringing in a third mouth to feed—and diaper, and clothe, and entertain—would most certainly throw them for a loop. It never hurt to have more money saved up, he knew this. He just hated that _she_ was taking on extra hours.

"Anything I can do to help you while you're gone?" he asked as cheerfully as possible. It was Monica, Chandler knew she could tell exactly how he was feeling inside, he just prayed she would choose to ignore it like he was.

"You're so sweet," she cooed, turning around and gently patting his cheek. "No honey, I'm okay. I've been doing some work around here all day, there's nothing that can't wait until tomorrow."

"Is there anything you can give me to make me at least _feel_ helpful?" he tried again.

"Oh, Chandler, you are helpful," she assured him, looking straight into his eyes to convey that she was serious. "I promise, just by asking how you can help shows how much you care, and I really appreciate it, okay? But I don't need you to do things for me all the time, okay? Just being around and staying so calm all the time is more help that you'll ever know."

Chandler nodded in defeat. "I wish you didn't have to go in," he admitted, pulling her close in a hug. He pressed his face against the top of her head and allowed himself to take in her scent, to just appreciate her while she was here, because there was a good chance he wouldn't see her again until almost midnight.

"I know, I'm sorry," she responded, face pressed to his shoulder. "Will you wait for me here tonight? I work lunch tomorrow, but I don't want to go a full day without seeing you."

"Of course," he assured her. "I'll be right here when you get back, ready to be your personal teddy bear for the night." That got a smile out of her, and Chandler sighed in relief. He hated when she was stressed, or upset, or tired, or any other of the hundreds of negative things she could be feeling at any given moment. That he was able to put a smile on her face if just for a second meant the world to him.

"I'll see you later then." She pulled away from his embrace with a kiss on the cheek, then he pulled her back for one on the lips before letting her go entirely. "I love you, Chandler."

"I love you, too, Mon," he grinned shyly. "And I love you, too, munchkin."

Monica looked down at her stomach and smiled. "It loves you too," she said, and he smiled back.

"Alright, now get out of here, go save your restaurant," Chandler waved at the door. She blew him one more kiss before she was out the door and Chandler was alone in the apartment. He turned to the fridge to see what the girls had in the way of easy dinner. He was so used to coming over here, even before there was a him and Monica, he sometimes forgot that this wasn't actually his apartment. He smiled a bit. Really this was _all_ of their apartment. The six of them shared it, regardless of who actually paid rent.

He settled on just a sandwich, since they had more than enough supplies for that, and took it across the hall to change out of his work clothes.

"Hey man," Joey greeted from his Barcalounger.

"Have you even moved since I left this morning?" Chandler asked.

"Sure," Joey shrugged. "I had to use the bathroom, and Monica wouldn't bring me lunch so I had to go across the hall for that."

Chandler just looked at him. "Well, I'm glad you've had such a productive day," he deadpanned. "Were you planning on moving at all the rest of the night, or should I find someone else to hang out with?"

Joey sat straight up. "What? No, dude, I wanna hang out!"

"Okay, let me change then," Chandler popped the last bite of sandwich into his mouth and ducked into his bedroom to take off the suit he wore to work, replacing it with sweatpants and a tshirt.

"No Monica?" Joey asked when he returned to the living room. Chandler took a seat in his chair and swiveled to face his roommate before leaning back.

"Nope, she had to go into work," he shrugged. "Pizza?"

"You know it," Joey nodded. "She's been working a lot lately," he observed. Chandler shrugged again. He knew it was true, but it wasn't Joey's business and his tone suggested wanting to talk about it. There was nothing to talk about. Instead of answering, he picked up the phone to call in their usual order of two pepperoni pizzas. He knew Joey was still looking at him, trying to read him, and Chandler was glad to have thirty years of practice at hiding how he was really feeling.

When he finally hung up the phone and informed Joey that it would be about thirty minutes, silence fell over the two of them, and Chandler knew it was only a matter of time before—

"Is everything okay with you and Monica?"

That.

"Everything's fine," he answered defensively. Because it was, really. They hadn't fought or anything like that, he was just a bit…he didn't know how to describe what he was feeling.

"You sure?" Joey pressed. "You seem upset."

"We're fine, Joe," Chandler huffed. "I just haven't gotten to see her very much this week with both of us being so busy."

"Just tell her not to work so much," Joey shrugged. "She's having a baby soon, right? Isn't she supposed to go on maternity leave?"

"You want me do tell _Monica_ to stop working?" Chandler turned to him in disbelief. "Are you insane? She won't even let me go grocery shopping for her! You think she'll quit her job just because I miss her?"

"Hey man," Joey defended. "It's not like she's quitting forever! Don't you think she'd want to take some time off?"

"Do you know her at _all_?" Chandler asked incredulously. "She'll slow down when she's on her death bed. She actually _likes_ her job, I'm not gonna take that away from her just so we can spend more time together."

"She'll have to go on maternity leave eventually though, right?" Joey asked. "Have you guys even talked about that?"

Joey actually brought up a good point, Chandler had to admit. They _hadn't_ talked about that, or really anything past the next week or so. Their plan to "take it slow" seemed to be limiting them in planning for the future, something that was critically important. They needed to talk about that, and soon. Chandler knew that, but he wasn't about to have this conversation with _Joey_ of all people.

"Just let us deal with it, okay?" Chandler pleaded. "Why don't you turn on Baywatch or something?"

That seemed to do the trick, as Joey turned excitedly back to the TV to set up the tape on their VHS player. Chandler allowed himself to sag against the counted now that Joey was sufficiently distracted. He liked to think that he and Monica were on the same page, one hundred percent of the time, as a result of their almost decade long friendship and the connection they shared. More and more, however, Chandler was discovering that that wasn't always the case. They were extremely compatible, and he would never stop believing that, but they weren't mind readers. They couldn't keep going on without talking about what happens next.

The buzzing of the intercom startled him out of his thoughts, and when Joey made no move to get up, Chandler sighed and went to unlock the building for the pizza delivery person. When they finally heard the knock on the door, Chandler pulled out his walled to pay while Joey took it upon himself to grab the pizzas. By the time he turned around, Joey was already on his second piece. Thankfully Chandler wasn't too hungry after the sandwich he'd made himself earlier, because it didn't look like he'd be getting more than a few slices to himself.

They were mostly quiet as they watched, save for Joey's occasional commentary on the lifeguards. Chandler couldn't focus on the TV show; he was too consumed with worry about where he was with Monica. _God_ he hated this. Monica was supposed to be the constant in his life, his rock; whether they were together or not, his relationship with her was the one thing he could count on. The feeling of that certainty slipping away was almost physically painful.

He ended up eating only two pieces of pizza before the knot in his stomach became too much, but if Joey noticed, he didn't say anything. After making their way through their tapes of Baywatch, Joey flipped to the Celtics game on ESPN, which didn't hold Chandler's interest any more than the previous show had. He found himself glancing at the clock with alarming frequency, waiting for it to be late enough to head back over to Monica's. _How is it only eight?_ he wondered to himself, willing the glowing numbers on the kitchen clock to change faster. He still had at least three hours before she would be back and he was already antsy.

He got up to throw the pizza boxes away, just to have something to do, and actually made the trip all the way down to the trash room in the basement instead of jamming them down the chute like they normally would. He moved as slowly and deliberately as he could, hoping that this would knock off _at least_ fifteen minutes of his night. Joey didn't say anything when he returned, his entire focus still on basketball, and Chandler debated just calling it a night and going to spend the evening waiting in Monica's room.

Just as he was about to cave, the apartment door opened again.

"Hey guys," Rachel greeted. "You seen Monica?"

"Chandler said she went into work," Joey responded, and Chandler nodded in agreement.

"I thought she was off today?"

"She said they needed her to fill in for the dinner shift," Chandler shrugged. "She'll be back late." He clanked at the clock again. Only eight-thirty. Had time always moved this slowly?

"Aww, I'm sorry," Rachel comforted, standing next to him in the kitchen and rubbing his arm.

"Why do people keep making this such a big deal?" Chandler exclaimed, pulling his arm away. "She went into work, because she has a job. That hasn't changed. And it has nothing to do with me! I don't care that she's working, so hoc come you guys do?" He was probably overreacting, but it had been awhile since he'd had an outlet for his conflicting emotions, and apparently today they were making themselves known in the form of frustration.

"Chandler, it's okay," Rachel moved away. "I didn't mean anything by it, I just figured you would want to spend more time with her, is all!"

"I know, I know," Chandler shook his head, trying to clear it. "I'm sorry, I'm just…I'm gonna wait for her across the hall."

With that, he strode quickly out of the apartment without looking back, the door slamming behind him. He went straight for Monica's room, and collapsed onto her bed, rubbing his hands over his face. His outburst had been uncalled for, and he knew it. But Joey and Rachel had both struck a nerve. Truth was he missed her like crazy; just sleeping next to her wasn't enough. He wanted to see her during the day, wanted to take her out for nice dinners, wanted to take some time to focus on _them_ , not them as parents.

There was a soft knock on Monica's bedroom door before it cracked open, revealing Rachel alone.

"You okay?" she asked.

"I could have been naked in here," he pointed out instead of answering.

"But you're not," she responded simply, crossing the room to sit next to him on the bed. "So? Want to talk?"

"Not really," Chandler huffed, which was kind of a lie. He needed to talk, preferably with Monica, but at this point just about anyone would do.

"Want to talk anyways?" she pressed, and Chandler sighed.

"I don't know," he admitted. "I don't know what I'm supposed to do."

"What you're supposed to do about what, sweetie?"

"I miss her," he said quietly. "I don't know where we are and I hate that, but I don't know how to ask. I don't want her to feel like I'm pressuring anything because I'm not. I'm not talking marriage or anything, but wouldn't it be nice to have _some_ idea of what life is gonna look like past this weekend? And I feel like such a girl worrying about it, but someone needs to." He looked up at her, meeting her eyes. "Has she said anything to you?"

Rachel was quiet, an Chandler could see her go over his confession in her head, processing and trying to decide the best response. He felt completely hopeless, and for a brief moment longed for earlier times, when Monica was his relationship coach and he could always count on her to have an answer to any problem he created. It was different now; since she was his girlfriend he couldn't exactly go to her for impartial relationship advice anymore. It was better this way, though. Chandler still believed that this was what was meant to happen. It felt too right to be wrong.

"Honey, you know Monica loves you more than anything," Rachel finally responded, speaking slowly. "She doesn't talk to me the way she used to either, you know. She's been keeping all this very close to her chest. Which means she's scared."

"Or that she doesn't think there's anything worth talking about," Chandler pointed out. "I could just be freaking out for nothing. I tend to do that, you know."

Rachel smiled. "Yeah, you do. But I think in this case you're right. You guys are having a baby; it's perfectly reasonable to plan for the future. And I'd bet you anything that Monica has this all planned out in her head, you just have to get it out of her."

"You're right," Chandler shook his head. "I just don't want to say the wrong thing."

"Of course you'll say the wrong thing," Rachel replied, rolling her eyes at his offended face. "And Monica will forgive you, and you'll be fine, because that's what you guys do. Chandler, she's not expecting you to be perfect, believe me. She'll just be happy that you're trying."

"Yeah, that's what she keeps saying," Chandler admitted.

"See? I promise, you're handling all this really, _really_ well," she assured him. "Now, if you're done freaking out for now, I'm going to get ready for bed. Are you gonna be okay until Monica gets back?"

"I'm a big boy, Rach," he huffed. "I can take care of myself."

Rachel laughed. "Okay, then. Goodnight Chandler."

"Night," Chandler replied as she closed the door behind herself before flopping down backwards and arranging himself so that his head was on the pillow. He didn't really feel any better after talking to Rachel, because he hadn't gotten any real answers. For all that Monica liked to put on a brave face for the rest of the group, she also liked to share everything with Rachel and Phoebe, and the knowledge that she hadn't been doing so worried him a bit.

Nine o'clock.

The minutes continued to drag by as Chandler let his thoughts run wild. Every second that passed before she got home was one more that he had to overthink everything. He contemplated trying to sleep, but as soon as he closed his eyes it was obvious that sleep wouldn't come easily. Between his racing thoughts and the lack of girlfriend to cuddle up with, there was little to no chance of calming himself enough for that.

Nine fifteen.

The door to the apartment opened and closed, and Chandler assumed that Joey had come in search of a late night snack, or that Rachel had decided to join Joey across the hall for a bit before bed. Soft footsteps approached the bedroom, and the door creaked open.

"I didn't expect you to be here yet."

Chandler sat straight up. "Monica? What are you doing here?"

"Slow night," she explained, moving closer to the bed. "I was tired, so they sent me home."

"Good, you need your rest," he responded, opening his arms in invitation. She knelt on the bed next to him for a quick kiss before standing up again.

"Give me a minute to shower, okay? If I lay down, I won't get up again and I _really_ need to shower."

"Okay, I'll be here," he grinned, feeling so much of his stress from earlier evaporate just at the sight of her face. Wow, was he whipped.

True to her word, it took Monica less than ten minutes to shower and dress herself in sweats—his sweats, actually—and join him in bed again.

"Mmm missed you," she mumbled into his chest, arm thrown around his waist.

"I missed you too Mon," he whispered, pressing soft kisses into her hair between breaths. It wasn't the time to bring up his concerns. She was tired, he was worn out, and what mattered right now was making sure that she was ready to get up in the morning and go back to work. The last thing they needed was for him to bring up something that might start a fight.

"Sorry I'm not much company tonight," she continued sleepily.

"As I recall, I did sign up to be your human teddy bear," he joked, brushing his fingers lightly over the side of her face, down her shoulder, until he finally rested them on her pregnant stomach. She was growing by the day, it seemed, and nothing in the world made Chandler happier than running his hand over the bump and knowing that he helped create the life in there. His other arm stayed wrapped tightly around her, holding her as close as physically possible. "Just having you here is all I need."

"You're the best," she trailed off, her breathing evening out until Chandler knew she was asleep.

"No, you're the best," he countered quietly, pressing one last kiss to her head before joining her in sleep. Tomorrow, he decided. Tomorrow they would talk.

* * *

Monica left early in the morning, leaving Chandler with a quick kiss goodbye before he rolled over to go back to sleep. Monica tended to get up early regardless of the day or her work schedule, whereas Chandler had never really broken out of his college habit of sleeping until noon on his days off. The early days of sneaking around had really taken their toll on him in that respect, and sometimes he thought he was still catching up on sleep, even weeks later.

He didn't emerge until the sound of voices in the kitchen became too loud to ignore.

"Look who decided to show up," Phoebe greeted from the kitchen table, nursing a coffee. Ross and Rachel sat on either side of her, holding their own cups. Joey was probably still asleep.

"Don't you guys have anywhere better to be at," he looked at the clock, "twelve-thirty on a Saturday? Monica's not even here to make you food."

"You don't even live here," Rachel protested. "I have more right to be here than you do."

Chandler grumbled unintelligibly as he shuffled his way to the coffee machine. "You know you could get better coffee downstairs. And I could still be sleeping."

"Oh, quit whining," Phoebe scoffed. "You went to bed at what, like, nine?" Chandler avoided her gaze because she kind of had a point.

"Dude when did you turn fifty?" Ross asked, and Chandler just glared at him in response, sipping slowly from his mug. Sure they had had an early night last night, but that was one of few. Between Monica's busy work schedule and his own, late at night was often their only time they spent together, and it was beginning to wear on him. He couldn't even begin to imagine how exhausted Monica must be, which reminded him of the cause for his stress the night before.

Yeah, the guys had no idea what it was like.

"Guys, come on, go easy on him," Rachel came to his defense. "It's hard work looking after a pregnant woman."

"I'm not even going to dignify that with a response," Chandler said shortly, downing the rest of his mug and putting it in the sink. He would wash it later, before Monica got home, along with whatever other messes the gang managed to create in the meantime. If Monica wouldn't tell him how to help, at the very least he could do these little things to make her life easier. It was the least he could do, really.

She would get off at three, so that gave Chandler just over two hours to get ready for the day, and to plan how he would broach the topic of the future.

 _The future_.

Every time he thought about it, a fresh wave of panic shot through him. He was barely thirty years old, and not very mature for thirty, he would admit. Until a few months ago, "the future" consisted of what he was having for dinner that night, and _maybe_ when his next night out with the guys would be. He lacked motivation in his career, he lacked experience in relationships (it really said a lot that his longest relationship before Monica had been _Janice_ ), and any thoughts of marriage, kids, and a house in the suburbs were so far to the back of his mind he wasn't even sure they existed. Now, those thoughts seemed to be the only ones he had.

Before he could spiral too badly, he made a retreat across the hall to get dressed, ignoring Phoebe's comment of "What's up with him?" on his way out. Joey's door was still closed, and Chandler spared a moment to wonder why they weren't bothering him about sleeping so late, even though he had no job and no pregnant girlfriend to occupy his waking hours. It wasn't worth his energy though, and besides, he was used to being put under a microscope by his friends; that's just the way it was.

In no rush to rejoin the group across the hall, Chandler got ready to take a nice long shower, hoping that that would relieve at least _some_ of the tension that had built up in him over the last few days. He brought a change of clothes into the bathroom with him and turned on the water as hot as he could handle. Steam quickly filled the room as he stepped under the hot spray, allowing it to pound down on his back for a while, making no move to start washing himself. He did his best to erase, at least temporarily, all thought from his brain, focusing only on steady rhythm of water. He desperately missed having Monica as his confidant. He knew he could still go to her with anything, and she would still have the ability to make him feel better than anyone else could, but it was different, since the one he was worried about was _her_.

So, not clearing his mind, then.

He groaned in frustration, before hurrying to lather his body with soap and rinse it away. He washed his hair just as quickly and shut the shower off. He stood there for a few moments, water dripping from his body, and was struck with how _alone_ he felt. In their ten years of friendship, he could count on one hand the number of times he'd been afraid to talk to Monica about something; even going to her for sex advice had seemed completely natural. But now everything was so complicated, between their relationship, the baby, and their friends' interference, that he felt like he was walking on eggshells around her. If he couldn't talk to Monica, who could he talk to?

Today, today they needed to talk. But how would he even begin?

He shivered, the water cooling against his skin and he grabbed his towel to dry himself completely before tugging on his boxers, khakis, and sweater. His hair just wasn't worth the effort, he decided, so he just hung his towel on its rack—Monica hated when he left his towel on the floor—and exited the bathroom.

Joey's door was open now, but there was no sign of the other man in the apartment, so Chandler assumed that he, too, had headed across the hall for breakfast. They could have all gone downstairs, but Chandler really didn't think he would be that lucky.

Instead of checking, he retreated to his room, closing both pieces of his door about halfway in an effort to communicate that he didn't want to be bothered, but without making it seem like he was sulking, because he wasn't. He was thinking.

It was after one-thirty now, apparently the process of showering had taken as long as Chandler had hoped it would. In less than two hours Monica would be home, and Chandler wanted to confront her right away, not giving himself time to talk himself out of it. He grabbed a pad of paper—further evidence of his girlfriend's influence—and a pen and began to scribble down notes.

 _I miss you_

 _I'm worried about you_

 _I don't want you exhausting yourself_

 _I wish you'd let me help more_

 _I miss you_

 _I love you_

Why was this so hard to put into words? For the pace and quantity at which these thoughts were racing around his head you'd think they would want to go somewhere, but no. Because Chandler's life was just never that easy.

 _I miss you_

 _I love you_

He chucked the pad across the room where it hit the wall with a _smack_ and groaned in frustration. That was the bottom line, wasn't it? He loved her _so much_ he didn't know what to do with himself. It was new and amazing and terrifying and all-encompassing, and the fact that she was carrying his _child_ only magnified each of these emotions. In less than five months they were going to be a family and that thought, as always, made Chandler's heart race in the absolute best way. So much had happened in such a short time. A year ago, he was (newly) single, lonely, and wondering if he was even capable of finding love, or if he was doomed to a life of being screwed over by everyone. Now, he was eight months into the longest relationship of his life and had a baby on the way, and couldn't remember a time when he had been so happy or scared in his entire life.

He glanced at the clock, almost two-fifteen. Time to get up and stop avoiding his friends, he figured. There were dishes to be done and he knew Rachel certainly wouldn't do them.

Everyone except Monica was gathered in the living room of apartment twenty, some daytime news program on the TV, thought Chandler doubted any of them were actually watching it that closely. They all looked up when he entered, and he went straight to the sink to tackle the plates, bowls, and coffee cups stacked there.

"You okay, man?" Ross asked cautiously, and Chandler glanced over his shoulder in acknowledgement.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Chandler responded as casually as he could. The last thing he needed was the other four getting involved in whatever internal crisis he was currently dealing with, especially before Monica herself was involved.

They all seemed to take his short response as a sign that he wasn't going to talk, and went back to whatever they had been discussing when he came in. Probably something to do with him and Monica, he figured, since that seemed to be the most common topic of conversation these days.

He allowed himself to focus on the task at hand, and put all of his energy into making sure that each dish was "Monica clean" and put away in its proper place. He had spent enough time in this apartment over the years, and even more in the past few months, that he was familiar with the system and he really hoped he wasn't just creating more work for her. He knew she would appreciate the effort either way, but it didn't do anyone any good if she ended up having to redo all his work.

He didn't know how much time had passed, but he didn't look up from the sink until he felt arms wrap around his waist and a distinct bump pressed against his back. He smiled to himself.

"Something's different here," he quipped, drying his hands with a dish towel and turning around in her embrace, wrapping his own arms around his girlfriend as her arms moved to rest over his shoulders.

"Hello to you too," Monica replied, standing on her toes to reach his lips for a kiss.

"Is it really three already?" he asked, resting his forehead against hers.

"Glad to see you didn't miss me too much then," she grinned, and Chandler poked her side.

"You kidding? I missed you like crazy. I've been going out of my mind for all three hours that I've been awake."

Monica rolled her eyes. "Weak," she teased. "But I missed you too. Coming home to you is always the best part of my day."

"Really?" he asked.

"Yes!" she laughed. "You do know that I happen to like being around you, right? I mean, I figured you'd have caught on by now."

"I just like hearing it," Chandler shrugged, secretly bursting with happiness, as he always did when he heard her say she loved him.

"You're impossible," Monica said fondly, lightly slapping the side of his face before leaning up to kiss him again.

"Ah, come on, can you guys not do that please?" Joey called, and honestly Chandler had completely forgotten that they had an audience.

"It's my apartment, I'll make out with my boyfriend if I want to," Monica responded firmly, a contrast to how soft and warm she felt in his arms. She rested her head on his shoulder and he tightened his arms around her, gently rocking them back and forth.

"I hate that you're so tired all the time," Chandler mumbled softly to her, and he felt her sigh.

"I know," she admitted. "Me too. It's no fun being on my feet all day when it feels like I'm standing for two."

"So start working less," he suggested suddenly. _So_ not the way he wanted this discussion to begin. He hoped for a moment that she would brush it off, wouldn't take it at face value, that this could wait until later, but he felt her pull back a bit to look him in the eyes. No such luck.

"Why would I start working less?"

"Oh come on, Monica, you're having a baby in a few months, there's no shame in taking a step back."

Apparently they were doing this now.

He could see the look that flashed in her eyes the moment before she pulled back completely, eliminating any contact between them. Chandler missed her touch immediately, but knew that this was not the time.

"Can you guys give us a minute?" she addressed the rest of the room, her even gaze not leaving his.

"Coffee house?"

"Yep, we're gone."

The other four scurried from the apartment, glancing cautiously between the two. Chandler didn't like where this was going, he didn't like it at all, but it was a conversation they needed to have, at the very least so he could stop stressing about it.

"Take a step back?" she repeated once they were alone.

"You know what I mean," Chandler replied. "You're tired all the time, you're hardly ever home, would it hurt to cut back on your hours a bit? You're gonna have to go on maternity leave eventually, you might as well ease into it."

"Ease into it? Chandler, don't you get it? I love my job, I love going into work, and right now more than ever I _need_ something like this to keep me sane!" her voice had risen in volume, not quite to a yell but she was on her way for sure.

"I'm not asking you to quit," Chandler argued. "I'm not asking you to sit around and do nothing all day, I just think you need to at least think about taking it easy for a bit. All this stress isn't good for you, and it can't be good for the baby."

"Oh, so now you think you know what's best for me?" she exclaimed. "You don't think I can take care of myself?"

"Come on, Mon, you know that's not what I—"

"I'm an adult, Chandler, and I may be pregnant, but I'm not an invalid. I can go to work, I can do my job, and I can do it without you checking up on me, okay? So cut the crap, and get off my back."

"You're blowing this way out of proportion," Chandler shook his head, frustration growing by the minute. "I never said you couldn't take care of yourself. I just wish you'd admit that you're human and that you need a break. There's nothing wrong with admitting you need help, you know? I'm trying my best here, but you won't work with me! You're picking up extra shifts left and right, then you're so hung up on controlling _everything_ that you won't let me do anything around here, that by the end of the day you're so exhausted that all you can do is collapse into bed. That's no way to go through life Monica, we're supposed to be a team, you know? And lately it seems like I barely see you at all!"

"Oh well I'm sorry that you're feeling neglected, but believe it or not I have bigger concerns right now!" she snapped. "Don't you get it? I _need_ this right now. I _need_ to go to work, I _need_ to feel like everything is normal for as long as I can because if I don't I'll go mad and the _last_ thing I need right now is to have you of all people on my back, okay? You wanna know how you can help? Get out."

She pointed to the door, and Chandler looked between her and the way out for a moment, deciding how far to push. He was so incredibly frustrated that he could punch something, to the point where he was barely hearing what she was saying. All he knew was that she wasn't listening to him, either, and that just irritated him further. Didn't she understand? He was _worried_ about her. He _cared_ about her and all she seemed to be doing was pushing him away. If she didn't want him around, then that's the way it would be.

He made sure to slam the door on the way out.

 **Duh-duh-duhhhhhh**

 **I told y'all that angst was coming...but what happens now?! Let me know what you thought of this chapter, and be sure to visit me on instagram supernatural_mondler for more Mondler feels!**


	11. Chapter 10

**Surprise! I bet you guys weren't expecting another update so soon! But with all the AMAZING reviews I got on the last chapter (seriously guys I as almost crying from happiness at the response) and the way I left you all hanging, I really really wanted to get another one out, so here we are! It's much shorter than the last one, so apologies for that, but it's a pretty important one!**

 **Once again, I CANNOT thank you guys enough for all your amazing reviews! Hearing how much you guys like the story has given me motivation to write more than I have in years (I mean it...I haven't written this much since early 2014 during my One Direction phase) and I am so truly grateful for every single one of you for making me enjoy writing again. Please continue to let me know what you think!**

Chandler hated sleeping alone now.

It didn't happen very often, hell, he had all but moved into her apartment by now, but when it did he barely slept at all. It didn't help that to top it off he was angry. Angry, and frustrated, and hurt, and completely at a loss at to what to do about it.

He had never been great at dealing with conflict in a relationship, and before Monica something like this would have almost certainly led to a breakup. That wasn't what this was though, was it? It was just a fight. She had told him that herself, months ago, before everything had been turned upside down.

 _You deal with it and you move on. It's nothing to freak out about._

Except "freaking out" was his go-to reaction for everything, and that included a major dispute with his girlfriend.

This wasn't a breakup. At least, Chandler really hoped it wasn't a breakup.

That didn't make him any better equipped to deal with the situation.

He tried going for a walk, but he didn't make it far before it started to rain, and while he may have been upset, he wasn't quite depressed enough to wander in the rain, so he had turned back, and now he was stuck in his apartment separated from the person he most wanted to talk to by just a few doors. It was still too soon, though. They both still needed to cool down.

No one had come back upstairs to bother them, or if they had, they'd steered clear of apartment nineteen, and Chandler wasn't sure whether to be grateful or not. On the one hand, he wanted to stew by himself, to allow himself to just _feel_ for a little while, and to try to process what comes next without his friends' misguided but well-intended interference. On the other hand though, he was already going out of his mind. It had been only a few hours, and Chandler had talked himself in about six circles and was at a total loss as to what to do next. Since his regular relationship coach was obviously off the table, he'd settle for just about any guidance at this point.

A glance at the clock told him that it was almost dinner time, and right on cue Joey and Ross burst through the door, arms loaded with all sorts of takeout boxes.

He looked up when they entered, but said nothing. It took a minute before they addressed him, but he knew they had noticed his presence. Ross grabbed some plates and forks, which Chandler knew from experience were just wishful thinking, as Joey dug into a carton of what looked like fried rice.

"So we talked to Monica," Ross mentioned casually.

Chandler sighed, slumping back in his chair.

"Can we not do this right now?" he asked.

"Dude, no one's mad at you," Ross added quickly.

"Except Monica," Joey inserted, before quieting again at Ross's glare. Chandler would have glared too but he just didn't have the energy.

"You guys just had a fight, it probably wasn't anyone's fault, so you can stop looking like I'm gonna rip your head off."

Chandler appreciated the concern, he did, but right now _Ross_ was far from his main worry.

"I'm just mad at myself, I think," Chandler admitted. "I think we both could have handled that better, but I should know by now not to engage when she gets worked up like that."

"So just go back over there," Joey encouraged.

Chandler shook his head, "Nah, we both went too far. I think going back over there now would just lead to another fight because we're so wound up. I'll talk to her in the morning or something. Now, what do you have over there?"

That seemed to satisfy the relatively short attention spans of his friends, and he could only hope that Monica had the girls over there with her, doing whatever it is girls do in this situation. Joey and Ross may not have been the most help, but at least he didn't have to spend the evening alone and for that he was grateful.

The evening seemed to drag, despite the company of his friends, and Chandler knew that it was because no matter what he did, he couldn't shake the guilt and angst of his and Monica's argument, and as the night stretched on, he missed her more and more.

Ross finally left around nine, and Chandler immediately excused himself to his room, his energy all but drained. He really hated sleeping alone, but he had no idea how Monica was feeling, and he didn't want to risk another fight so soon. Plus, he was still a bit irritated that she had just dismissed his concerns for her wellbeing and didn't trust himself not to blow up at her again if it came down to it.

He changed into his sleep clothes and crawled into his bed, preparing for a long night of tossing and turning. He ached to hold his girlfriend, to sleep next to her, to feel the shape of his child inside her. He felt as empty as his bed, and wrapped himself around a spare pillow just to create the _illusion_ of company. It didn't work, he knew it wouldn't, but it was better than nothing.

Sleep didn't come for a long time, and when it did, it was a restless, dreamless sleep. Multiple times throughout the night he found himself jerking awake and reaching out blindly for the other body that wasn't there. He drifted off for the final time just as the sun began to peek in through his windows, and when he woke again he was up for good. It was only eight, but still he pulled himself out of bed and trudged through his morning routine. Freshly showered, he dressed for the day and braced himself for whatever was waiting across the hall.

Monica was stubborn, he knew that better than anyone. No matter how sorry she felt, she wouldn't seek him out first out of pride, so it had to be up to him to take the first step. He couldn't bare to be apart from her for another minute, no matter how angry she still might be.

He crept slowly through the living room, and paused when he found himself outside the door to the other apartment. Should he knock? He never had in the past, but what was the protocol in this situation? Would she be upset to see him so soon? Or disappointed that he had waited so long? As he tended to do, Chandler began to doubt everything in those moments, and a part of him wanted to slink back to his own room and hide in bed for the next week.

But that was the old Chandler talking. He wasn't that person anymore, not really. New Chandler had been dating Monica steadily for eight whole months. New Chandler was going to be a dad, and couldn't be more excited about it. New Chandler would do anything it took to make Monica happy, even if that sometimes meant giving in. New Chandler really just wanted to see his girlfriend.

With that, he cautiously gripped the handle and opened the door slowly, peeking inside. Rachel wouldn't be awake yet he knew, but Monica might be. It was her day off—and how ridiculous was it that his worry about not spending time with her had led them to waste the one night they both had completely free all week?—but she still liked to be up earlier than the rest of them.

As he suspected, Monica sat by herself at the kitchen table reading a magazine, a glass of orange juice in front of her. She looked up when he entered, closing her magazine to give him her full attention. Chandler took that as a good start.

"Hey," he began.

"Hey," she nodded at him, standing slowly but keeping the table between them. He made no move to approach her, wanting to let her decide how close they could be.

"So last night sucked," he said, and she cracked a smile at his brutal honesty.

"Yeah," she agreed, deflating a little, and Chandler took a careful step closer, exhaling silently in relief when she mirrored his action.

"I missed you. Like, a crazy amount."

"Me too," she smiled softly, taking another step towards him. He carefully closed the distance between them to take her in his arms, holding her tightly against him. Her arms wrapped around his torso as she buried her face in his chest and he buried his in her hair. He instantly felt a hundred times better, just having her there. Holding her, feeling her, smelling her.

He was _so_ in love.

"Let's never do that again," he mumbled, and she huffed out a laugh that he felt through his shirt.

"Deal," she said, and he kissed the side of her forehead gently. They stood there for a few moments, just appreciating the feel of each other, soaking up the touch that they had missed so much since the previous afternoon.

"We stiff have to talk about this, don't we?" he asked, regretfully pulling back so he could look at her, but moving one hand to rest on her stomach.

She sighed. "Yeah, we do."

"So? Who's gonna start?"

She smiled at him in amusement. "Since when were you the expert at solving relationship crises?"

"Since I got into a relationship I really cared about," he answered honestly, and her face softened into the most beautiful smile that made Chandler go a little weak in the knees.

"You were right," she admitted, and in any other situation Chandler would be preparing to gloat, but even he knew that now was not the time. "I have so much going on, and not nearly enough hours in the day to take care of everything I need to, and I took it out on you. I'd like to blame the hormones, but I know they're not fully responsible." She looked up at him through her eyelashes, and he gently brushed hair from the side of her face, taking great care to stroke her cheek as he did so. "But Chandler, you have to understand. You can't tell me what to do, okay? You can't. I may push myself too far, but I always do that. You need to trust me that I know how much I can handle, okay?"

"I do trust you," Chandler said immediately, taking both of her hands in his. "I know you can take care of yourself, and I know you're independent. That's one of the things I love about you." She blushed, and he smiled at her reaction to his words. "I know you _can_ do everything, but the thing is, you don't _need_ to. That's why I'm here. You've taken care of all of us for so long, I want to take care of you for a change."

"I'm not quitting my job," she argued.

"And I'm not asking you to," he interrupted quickly. "Mon, I would never ask you to do that, I know how much you love your job. I want you to continue enjoying it, and you can't do that if you're so exhausted because you're only getting like five hours of sleep. Let me help you. You know work doesn't keep me busy, I have time to help you around here. I can do exactly what you tell me to, just say the word."

"I know I'll have to cut back on work soon," Monica admitted, voice quiet. "And I hate it. This is all…so hard Chandler, you have no idea. I just need to hold onto normal for as long as I can."

Chandler pulled her close again, running his hands up and down her back in a way that he hoped was comforting.

"I know, I know," he murmured, though he knew he had absolutely no idea what she was going through. All he could do was offer comfort, and give her whatever she needed. He just needed her to tell him what that was. "You're so brave, Mon, okay? You are, you're a superhero, and our baby is so lucky to have you as a mother. You amaze me every day, honey."

He felt her breath hitch and knew she was crying, though she would never admit it. He just held her tighter, whispering softly into her hair as he rocked them back and forth where they stood in the kitchen. This was just another thing that scared him to death about the whole situation. He had never been great at dealing with emotions, his or other people's, and this was only the beginning. This wasn't just a nine-month commitment; this was going to be his life for the next eighteen years.

Wasn't it?

They still hadn't talked about what would happen beyond the birth, and Chandler sometimes wondered just how involved Monica meant for him to be. Even now she was brushing off his offers to help, claiming over and over that she could do it by herself. Had she been intending that the entire time? Did she even want him around after all? She loved him, he felt fairly confident in that, but there was a huge difference between best-friend-you've-been-dating-for-eight-months love, and spend-the-rest-of-our-lives-together love.

As Monica's tears subsided, Chandler felt his own brain go once again into overdrive.

"Chandler?" she asked softly, looking up at her with red eyes that just about broke his heart. "Are you okay?"

"Me? Yeah, fine," he responded quickly. They had just had one crisis, they didn't need another one.

"No you're not," she argued, pulling back a little and wiping once at her face to get rid of the remaining tear tracks. "Chandler, what are you thinking about?"

"Okay, it's really nothing, it's just…" he paused, trying to think of the best way to phrase it. "We haven't really talked about…after, I guess."

"After?"

"You know, after the baby is born."

"Oh."

She looked down and backed away, and Chandler allowed her to create space between them. This wasn't the first time he had tried to bring this up, and he was fairly certain that Rachel and Phoebe grilled her on the topic pretty regularly too, but for someone who had dreamed her entire life of commitment, she always seemed to dodge the conversation when he brought it up.

Chandler never thought he'd see the day when _he_ was the one initiating a conversation about the future.

"It's…surely you've thought _some_ about what's gonna happen, right?" he continued when she said nothing. "I mean, you have a plan for everything! And it's only a few months away now and I just wanna make sure we're on the same page, you know?" Chandler was rambling now, but he wanted nothing more than for Monica to shut him up, to put him out of his misery, to give _some_ indication that he was being totally paranoid and had nothing to worry about.

Monica didn't look at his when she finally did speak. "I just…there's so much that has to happen between now and then, you know? That's what I'm focusing on right now, getting through these next four months. Everything else can come later. It's gonna be okay though, I promise." Chandler just nodded absently, her answer doing nothing to ease his anxieties. "Hey, Chandler." When he looked up again, she was standing right in front of him, blue eyes gazing into his. "We're good, right? You and me? We can do anything."

Chandler had no response to that, just nodded again, as she wrapped her arms around his waist again. So close like this, he could easily feel the outline of the bump pressed against him, and he realized that the thought of his kid might be the only thing keeping him from going completely over the edge. One way or another, he was gonna have a baby in less than five months; everything else would work itself out around that.

Now if only he could get rid of the feeling of dread in his gut that something was going to go terribly wrong.

 **I'm sorry, I'm so mean, but let me know what you think anyways? *runs and hides***


	12. Chapter 11

**Hiiii guys so I really didn't think I would have this finished this week, but I got hit with a truckload of inspiration and motivation today so here we are. I'm just having so, so much fun writing this and working with the characters in this way, especially Chandler...when I first started writing this I did intend (as many of you have requested) to switch between Chandler and Monica's POV, but the deeper I got into writing, the more invested I've found myself in Chandler's inner workings and I just couldn't bring myself to switch away (which is weird, because those of you who know me know how much I love Monica). So, just in case anyone was still wondering, there probably won't be any Monica POV in this story or series.  
**

 **That being said, I LOVE hearing what you guys think! Feedback is my number one motivator with this story, so the more comments I get, the sooner I'll get the next chapter out to you guys!  
**

 **ALSO needed to put a warning in here: there is sex at the end of this chapter. Still not super graphic, but it's there. Read at your own risk.**

"Hey guys," Rachel greeted, taking a seat in the armchair at Central Perk. Chandler and Monica were curled up together on one side of the couch, with Ross next to them. Both of Chandler's hands rested over Monica's stomach, gently stroking the bump as he often found himself subconsciously doing these days. It reminded him just how much he had to look forward to, and never failed to calm him down no matter how much he felt like he was spiraling out of control.

"Hey Rach," Monica smiled up at her friend, and Chandler waved his own greeting.

"They were just saying that they have another doctor's appointment this afternoon," Ross informed her and Rachel's face lit up like she had been given the best news ever.

"Ooh are you going to find out if it's a girl or a boy?" she squealed, leaning forward in her seat.

Monica smiled and looked back at Chandler, who grinned down at her in return.

"Nah," she replied. "I mean, we could find out if we wanted to, but it's more fun to be surprised, you know? Besides, this way we get to think about names for boys _and_ girls."

"Oh, Chandler, I'm sure you're just _thrilled_ about that," Rachel mocked, and Chandler shook his head.

"I've got a few ideas," he admitted vaguely. Monica turned in his arms, and he frowned briefly in disappointment when the movement jostled one of his hands from its place on her belly.

"You do?" she asked.

"Don't look so surprised!" he said defensively. "We don't have to use any of them, but it's kind of fun to think about."

"Well, are you planning on sharing them with me then?"

Chandler looked up at the eager faces of their two friends, both expressions a mix of surprise and curiosity. It was no secret that the others—except maybe Joey, bless him—were still a bit skeptical as to his dedication in the whole process. He couldn't exactly blame them, but he also thought he had done a pretty good job so far of proving them wrong. The one person that mattered, though, was looking at him with such adoration, like she couldn't believe her luck when really _he_ was the lucky one for getting to experience this all with her. Because that was the bottom line, wasn't it? This was for _them_ , and it didn't matter what their friends thought; he had nothing to prove to them. They were no more a part of this than they were the rest of their relationship. He didn't have to make a big deal about being excited for fatherhood around them because the only person who mattered already understood how amazing this was for him.

So instead of answering, he gently kissed her forehead and mumbled, "Later," before shifting her in his embrace again so that both hands could easily touch her bump. He felt himself relaxing immediately, even more so when her hands rested on top of his.

"Ugh, you're no fun," Rachel huffed, leaning back in the chair and crossing her arms like a sulking child. Monica shook her head in amusement and Chandler could tell she was smiling.

"Alright, help me up," Monica instructed, patting Chandler's hands to signal that he move them. "I gotta pee, then we can get going."

"Mon we still have over—" Monica shot him a look and he put up his hands defensively, not finishing the thought. If she wanted to leave early, they were leaving early. He helped steady her as she stood, hands hovering protectively around her waist until she was completely upright. She hadn't gotten so big yet that it was hard to walk, but her center of balance had definitely shifted, so things like getting up took some careful coordination while she adjusted.

He settled back on the couch for a few minutes while he waited for her.

"You haven't _actually_ been thinking of baby names, have you?" Ross asked skeptically.

"Of course I have," Chandler replied. "I'm having a baby, the baby's gonna need a name, why wouldn't I be thinking about it? Monica's not in charge of everything, you know!" Both his friends shot him similar looks of disbelief. "Okay, yeah, she's in charge. But I still get a say too!"

"Then why won't you tell us what they are?" Rachel whined.

"Because I want to talk to Monica before I talk to any of you guys, no offense," he shrugged. "And I'm sure she'll go running to you and Phoebe immediately after to share every detail like you girls do, which you can then share with everyone you see on the street, so everybody wins."

Rachel gave him a curious look, which she then shared with Ross before returning her gaze to Chandler.

"Chandler, honey," she spoke slowly. "Monica's barely told us anything about you guys since we found out. She's more secretive about all this than you are."

Chandler didn't know how to respond to that, he thought surely the girls had been gossiping like crazy for the past few months. Before he could give it too much thought though, he felt fingers lightly scratching at his scalp, so he looked up to meet the eyes of his girlfriend, and found himself smiling as an impulse. He couldn't look at her and _not_ smile.

"You ready to go?" she asked.

"Yes ma'am," he hopped up, walking around the couch to press a kiss to her temple before taking her hand. "Okay children, looks like we're off," he waved at Ross and Rachel, who waved back silently, Rachel still looking like she was trying to piece something together.

The weather had been nice enough lately that they wanted to walk the slightly less than two miles to the OBG-YN, taking advantage of Monica's energy while she still had it. She claimed she was going stir crazy being inside all the time, with her work still taking up the majority of her weeks. They hadn't had another blowup since the previous one over a week ago, but Chandler couldn't shake the feeling that something big was coming, and the knowledge that she wasn't sharing with even Rachel and Phoebe just made him all the more nervous.

"You're being quiet," Monica commented. "It's weird."

"A lot on my mind," he explained vaguely. "Hey, Rachel said something that kinda surprised me."

"Oh yeah?"

"She said that you haven't been sharing everything about, y'know, _us_ with her and Phoebe. She seemed a bit upset about it."

"Oh," Monica said evenly. "I guess I haven't."

"How come?" he asked.

"I don't need to share _everything_ with them, do I?" she raised her eyebrows at him. "Sometimes I just want _us_ to stay, you know, with us."

"What happened to _women tell each other everything_?" he smirked, recalling numerous conversations he had had with Ross, back when Ross and Rachel had been a thing and he had still being with Janice. _And thinking I was in love_ , he thought. How naïve he had been; he knew now that he had never truly felt love until Monica, because the feelings he had when he was with her just couldn't be put into words.

"Maybe _Rachel_ tells us everything," Monica huffed, rolling her eyes. "Personally I like keeping the private details of my life private, and we all know Phoebe has more secrets than the US government."

"Huh," Chandler responded pensively. Now that he thought about it, he had never really known what was going on in her love life unless he dragged it out of her, or one of the others did. He supposed he always thought that she still shared everything at least with Rachel, but everyone knew Rachel couldn't keep a secret to save her life, so maybe not. Huh. "Remind me to never date Rachel then."

"Honey," she said with a laugh, "if you need me to _remind you_ about tht, then we have some bigger problems."

Chandler laughed in response, squeezing her hand that was swinging between them and slowing down to kiss the top of her head.

"No problem at all," he mumbled, pulling her closer to his side so he could wrap an arm around her shoulder. "I'm all yours, baby."

"Good," she nodded seriously. "I'm all yours too, you know that right? I love you so much."

"I know," Chandler confirmed. "I do like to hear it though, it's very good for my ego."

"Your ego is fine," Monica rolled her eyes, but she was still smiling. Chandler wanted to keep her smiling forever.

* * *

Chandler had his head rested in Monica's lap, her hands buried in his hair. All six of them were seated around Monica and Rachel's living room, the first time they had all been together in what seemed like ages. He knew a lot of that fell on him and Monica; with how crazy everything had gotten lately, their free time was limited, and what little time they did have they often preferred to spend as just the two of them.

As it was, he still felt like they were in their own little world at the moment. For him, at least, the entire world centered on the beautiful woman holding him and the tiny human creating the bump in her stomach. Every minute or so (or possible even more frequently—Chandler was addicted), he would turn his head to press a kiss there, or to murmur something quietly that he was sure the baby and only the baby could hear. Monica's hand tightened in his hair every time he did so, and Chandler liked to know that she was enjoying this as much as he was.

He was broken out of his little world when Phoebe spoke up.

"So, Rachel said you guys went to the doctor's today?"

"Yeah," Monica answered for the both of them. "Everything's healthy and right on schedule." Chandler ran his hand softly over the bump at the mention of the baby. Part of him—a really big part, if he was completely honest—was still waiting for something to go wrong. Every day that went by, every successful doctor's appointment where they were told that everything was fine, he allowed himself to breathe a little easier. Good things didn't happen to him; he'd adopted that mentality years ago. This, though, this was an amazing thing, one which would more than make up for all the bad things that had happened to him in the past. He still couldn't believe it.

"And the sex?" Phoebe prompted.

"We already told Ross and Rachel, we don't want to know," Monica reminded her shortly. "We really don't, and we didn't find out."

"Jeez, sorry," Phoebe put up her hands defensively. Chandler couldn't help feel bad; he knew better than anyone that Monica was just tired, that she didn't mean to snap, and that Phoebe didn't deserve it. Instead of addressing the rest of the group, though, Chandler took he hand that wasn't playing with his hair in his own and gave it a squeeze, his way of reminding her that it was okay. She squeezed back and he brought it to his lips to kiss, before kissing her belly again.

"Do you guys _have_ to do that where we all can see it?" Ross complained, closing his eyes in disgust.

"Yes," Chandler answered simply, kissing her stomach again just to irritate him. And because he like to do it, but that was secondary, really.

"Aww, I think it's sweet," Rachel cooed, and Phoebe nodded in agreement.

Monica tapped his head to signal to him to sit up, which he did with a sign.

"Gotta pee," she explained, and he nodded in understanding.

"Hurry back," he grinned obnoxiously, causing her to roll her eyes. She was smiling, though, and Chandler knew she liked his teasing.

The attention of the other four had been diverted by something on the TV—Chandler honestly hadn't even noticed it was on until just now—so he was spared the questioning he was usually subjected to whenever Monica left the room.

It made sense, now knowing how little Monica herself was sharing. They were a nosy group, and Monica was a lot more stubborn than him, so he would end up being their best bet. Because obviously letting them keep their relationship details to themselves wasn't an option.

Monica must shave crept up behind him, because next thing he knew there were firm hands on his shoulders, her face very close to his.

"How quickly do you think we can get them out of here?" she whispered, sending a shiver through his body. He would never get tired of her, couldn't imagine her not having such a strong effect on him. He didn't know how to get their friends out, but he knew he wanted them gone _now_.

"We could just go into your room and hope they get the message," he suggested, doing his best to regulate his breathing so as not to alert the others as to what was going on. Though that might actually solve their current problem.

"C _handler!_ " she slapped his shoulder, whether in frustration or annoyance, he couldn't tell.

"What are you girls whispering about there?" Phoebe asked, though the look on her face told them that she knew _exactly_ what they were whispering about.

Ross looked between the two of them before twisting his face in disgust when he finally caught Phoebe's implication.

"Eww, you guys, seriously?" he complained.

"Hey, I'm almost five months pregnant, I can have sex with my boyfriend if I want to," Monica retorted.

" _Now?_ " Ross grimaced.

"If you don't want to listen, there's a perfectly good apartment across the hall," she replied, and grabbed Chandler's arm to pull him towards her bedroom without so much as a glance back to see if anyone had moved. For his part, Chandler put up no argument whatsoever—his extremely attractive girlfriend wanted to sleep with him, who was he to get in the way?

As soon as the door closed behind them, Monica was on him, lips finding his and hands immediately going to work on the buttons of his shirt.

"Sorry about that," she mumbled against his neck, not sounding sorry at all. "But I just needed them to leave. I'm gonna use these pregnancy hormones as an excuse for as long as I can."

"Hey, I'm not complaining," Chandler replied as casually as he could, running his own hands down her back then back up underneath her shirt. He went to work immediately on unhooking her bra and she pulled back from the kisses she was pressing to his shoulder just long enough to pull her shirt off completely, bra following. Chandler picked her up to walk the extra few feet to the bed and sat down so that she was on his lap, facing him.

Monica finished her work on his shirt, and he shrugged it off, pulling his undershirt off after it.

"How do you want it?" Chandler breathed between kisses.

"Like this," she ran her hands down his bare chest, pushing him backwards as she did so. She hovered over him, and Chandler shifted his touch to her stomach.

"You're gonna wanna cover your ears for this, kiddo," he grinned, causing Monica to huff and slap his hands away.

"You're the worst," she informed him before kissing him to prove that he was not, in fact the worst.

"Love you too honey," he replied, bringing one hand up to comb through her hair while the other held her around her waist, pressing the fronts of their bodies together. He could feel every curve of her form against him and it was the most arousing thing he had felt in his life. It seemed like the more pregnant she got, the more attracted to her he was which if he was completely honest was _not_ something he was expecting. Fortunately for him, the more pregnant she got, the more she seemed to want sex. So really it was a win-win.

"C'mon," she urged, when he made no further move. She reached for the front of his pants, but Chandler beat here there and unbuttoned them himself, lifting his hips so she could help him pull them down. His boxers followed immediately—she may have just pulled them off at the same time, Chandler's brain was a little fuzzy—and suddenly he was completely naked and it just didn't seem fair that Monica was still wearing her own pants.

She must have read his mind because not even a moment later, she was kneeling over him, tugging her leggings and underpants down over her hips at the same time.

"C'mere," he reached his arms up to her and she laid on top of him again. "Good thing we don't have to bother with a condom right now, because I would _not_ be able to find one right now."

"Please stop trying to make jokes during sex," Monica rolled her eyes. "You're lucky I'm as horny as I am."

"Don't pretend you don't like it," he teased back, but she didn't respond, shutting him up with another kiss meant to completely rock his world. It succeed for sure, because suddenly all Chandler could think about was getting inside her _now_.

"Hurry up," she encouraged, and Chandler didn't need to be told twice, leaning up on one forearm while guiding himself to her entrance.

" _Oh god_ ," she moaned as she sunk onto him, their bodies fusing like they had so many times before, but Chandler knew he would never get enough of this feeling, no matter how many times they did it. She had admitted that he was the best she ever had, and that certainly went both ways. Chandler had never enjoyed sex with anyone nearly as much as he enjoyed sex with Monica.

It had taken on a new meaning for him, no longer just about a physical connection—though it was certainly that—but an emotional one too. He thought it must mean more to him with her than with anyone else because he had never truly loved anyone else the way he loved her. And now, they had made a baby. Nothing could ever hope to be as significant as that, in his mind.

He collapsed fully on his back as the sensations threatened to overwhelm him, pulling Monica as close as he could.

"I love you, I love you so much," he repeated, kissing whatever part of her he could reach as she moved up and down on top of him.

"I love you," she panted, turning her head to capture his lips with hers once more.

It didn't take long for either of them to get there, it seemed like they were almost always on edge these days, just waiting for any opportunity they had for release. Monica could blame it on the pregnancy, Chandler really had no excuse other than his girlfriend was hot.

When they finished, Monica rolled off of him so that she was lying on her side with one arm draped over his chest.

"Well," he began. "I really hope everyone left for that, or else Ross might actually kill me."

Monica huffed out a laugh, lightly slapping his chest. "I'm never sleeping with you again," she threatened.

"You wish," he smiled down at her, heart constricting as she smiled back up at him. "You're stuck with me now baby."

"What a hardship," she lamented. Chandler kissed the top of her head fondly, and she rested her head on his chest. "I love you."

"I love you too, Mon," he responded, pulling her as close against his side as he could. "I love you, and I'm so grateful to be able to go through all of this with you."

"I wouldn't want to do it with anyone else," she replied honestly. "You're gonna be the best daddy our baby could ever want."

Chandler smiled. "Is it crazy that I like the sound of that? It should scare me, right? That I'm gonna be a daddy? But it doesn't, at all."

"No Chandler, that's not crazy at all," she assured him. "It's…it's really good. It's why I want to do this with you, because I know we didn't plan this, but I also know that you want this as much as I do. And you have no idea how much that means to me."

Chandler did know, though. He remembered how torn up she had been after realizing that Richard didn't want kids, how heartbroken she'd been when they'd split as a result. For as long as he'd known her, this was all she had wanted, and it meant more to him than he could express that he could be the one to give it to her.

"You've grown up so much since I met you," she continued, and Chandler huffed a laugh at the thought of Chandler-from-ten-years-ago finding out he would be a father. Well, he probably wouldn't have stuck around to find out much more than that. "I'm serious, honey, I'm so proud of you."

Chandler felt heat flood his cheeks at her praise. "Yeah, well, you certainly make it easy for me," he deflected.

"I really don't," Monica argued. "I know I'm a mess right now, and I'm all over the place, but I would be so much worse without you. You're my rock; I just really, really appreciate you being so good about this."

"You're having our baby, you're allowed to be a little all over the place. And I can't imagine _not_ being okay with this. I mean, I know I did freak out at first, but once I really thought about it there was no doubt in my mind what I wanted." He turned his attention to her bump where it was pressed against his side. "How could I not want you, huh kiddo?" He stroked his hand softly over her stomach. "You're gonna change our lives. And it's gonna be scary and unpredictable and I can't wait. I can't wait to meet you," he looked back at Monica, who now had tears in her eyes, keeping his hand resting gently over their baby, he gazed at her with as much sincerity as he could muster. "And I can't wait to be a family."

 **I thought y'all deserved some fluff after the angst-fest that was the past few chapters...but will it last? Stay tuned folks! Don't forget to let me know what you thought of this, and come talk to me on instagram supernatural_mondler!**


	13. Chapter 12

**Hey guys...so it's been a little bit, huh? Sorry about that. I wish I could say I had a huge, groundbreaking update to make up for it, but I don't yet, so here's this instead. I'm not proud of it, but I wanted to get _something_ out to you guys since I promised people on Instagram that something would be coming this week (actually, I think I said something would be coming last Monday or Tuesday, so here I am on Friday). I promise this story is going somewhere, but I didn't want to make huge time jumps so the result is a few filler chapters of fluff. **

**Like I said, I don't think I like this chapter at all, but hopefully it's not too disappointing? Let me know what you guys think, and I'll do my best not to take so long in between updates next time. This story WILL be finished, this I can promise you. I WILL NOT leave it incomplete, so don't worry about that, and hopefully what I have planned for the next few chapters makes all this filler worth it.**

"Chandler! Chandler, wake up!"

Chandler groaned and tried to shrug off the incessant poking on his arm before realizing what, or who, was attempting to wake him and jerking up in bed.

"What?! What? What's wrong, are you okay?" he rushed out, quickly, checking his girlfriend over for any potential sign of distress.

"Chandler!" she interrupted. Before he could start up again, Monica grabbed his hand and placed it squarely over the bump on her stomach. He didn't feel anything for a moment, and was about to tell her as much, when he suddenly felt a small flutter against his palm.

"Is that…?" he gasped, bringing his other hand to rest on her belly as well. It was another moment before he felt it again, but when he did, he felt tears spring to his eyes.

"Yes," Monica breathed, her own eyes shining with tears. "That's the baby, Chandler. That's our baby."

"That's our baby," Chandler repeated, hypnotized by the sensation of tiny feet pressing against his hand. "That's…oh my god."

Monica brought her hands to his face to pull him into a kiss. He sat up so he could pull her into his lap and pulled her as close as physically possible, wanting to feel every inch of her. The baby had stopped kicking for the moment, so Chandler reluctantly moved his hands to Monica's back, bringing her as close as her bump would allow as they continued to kiss slowly.

It was the middle of the night, and they both were too tired for much more than this, but just being close to her was more than enough. She gently slid her hands down his cheeks to his shoulders and down his arms. He brought his hands to meet hers in the middle and she brought their joined hands to rest on her stomach again as their kissed tapered off and eventually stopped. She leaned her head on his shoulder so she could still look down, and Chandler rested his head on top of hers.

"Wow," she sighed.

"It gets realer every day doesn't it?" Chandler squeezed her hands and kissed her gently on the top of her head.

"You know we're halfway there?" she asked. "Four and a half months from now we're gonna get to meet this little guy. Do you think we're ready?"

"Now?" Chandler asked. "No. We don't have a crib, or a changing table. I still have no clue how to change a diaper, and we haven't even started talking about names. But four months from now?" he kissed her forehead, causing her to look up and meet his gaze. "Yeah, I think we'll be just fine."

Monica was quiet for a moment, and Chandler knew she was thinking, deciding how to phrase something.

"Chandler?" she hesitantly broke the silence.

"Hmmm?" he replied sleepily.

"Do you…" she took a deep breath. "Do you think I'll be a good mom?"

Chandler jerked his gaze to hers, but she continued to look down, avoiding his eyes. He brought a hand to her chin to tilt her head up, heart breaking at the genuine fear he saw in her eyes when he did so.

"Sweetheart, why would you even ask that?" he asked, genuinely confused. There was no one he knew who was better equipped to be a parent than her, and that included a lot of people who were actually parents.

"What if I do something wrong, or the baby hates me, or…or…" she trailed off, and Chandler knew what she was thinking, what she wanted to say. He gently pulled her head close to him again as she started to cry softly, tears soaking their way through his shirt. "What if I end up like my mother?" she finished, and Chandler held her tighter, not for the first time finding himself irrationally angry at Judy Geller. It was bad enough that she had made Monica—his sweet, beautiful Monica—grow up not realizing just how amazing she was, but now she had Monica doubting her own ability to love a child.

"Baby, you are not your mother, okay?" he soothed quietly, rocking her in his arms. "There is no one in the world who I would rather have as the mother of my baby. And not just because I love you, which I do, more than anything, but because there is no one in the world who I think is going to be a better mom than you. And I know I'm not the only one who thinks that." He kissed the top of her head. "You're a natural with kids, and you're so, _so_ good of taking care of people. You take care of all of us every day. You wanna know why I'm not scared of having this baby? Because I know that you're not gonna let anything go wrong, because that's just who you are. You're gonna be the best mommy in the entire world because you want to be, and you're always the best at everything you do. And I'll be there, too, remember? I may not be model father material yet, but I'm sure between the two of us we'll be able to figure it all out, don't you think?"

She didn't respond, just continued to cry and Chandler let her, by now very used to these displays of emotion which had been so rare before her pregnancy. He took pride in knowing that he was the only one allowed to see her like this, that she was beginning to really let her guard down around him. It made him realize just how far they'd come in the past few months. She was nowhere near as reliant on him as he sometimes wanted her to be, and adamantly refused most of his help during the day, but during moments like these when it did all become too much, she just allowed him to hold her while she broke down. Chandler couldn't help but find her even stronger because of it.

Suddenly she grabbed his hand again and placed it over her belly and all her worries seemed to be forgotten as they felt the physical proof of their baby, kicking away against their joined hands.

"Looks like now that this little guy has figured out he knows how to kick, he's not gonna stop," Monica commented with a watery laugh.

"He? You think it's a boy?"

Monica shrugged, absently tracing patterns on the back of his hand with her thumb. "I don't know, maybe?" she responded, trying to seem causal, though Chandler knew she had probably spent a lot of time thinking about this. "Call it…mother's intuition or something."

Chandler smiled and kissed her forehead. "Well, I'm not going to argue with mother's intuition," he teased with an affectionate smile. "You would know him better than anyone, so if you say it's a boy, I'll believe you."

"I didn't say it was for sure!" she protested. "Just that…I don't know, I have a feeling or something. Watch it be a girl now, really drive home what crappy instincts I have for this. I don't even—"

"Mon," Chandler interrupted her, causing her to look up at him again. He smiled down at her fondly, completely overcome by the love he had for the woman in his arms. "I think it's a boy too."

Her answering smile was worth the entire world to him.

* * *

" _Oh my god!_ " Rachel squealed for what seemed like the hundredth time in an hour. All three girls were sitting on Monica's couch—Phoebe and Rachel on either side of Monica—completely transfixed by the newfound movement of the baby.

"I know!" Monica beamed, looking over her shoulder at Chandler who was standing by the fridge, a water bottle in each hand. He shook his head at her fondly, trying to feign annoyance at their friends' enthusiasm, but both of them knew that he was more excited than Rachel and Phoebe combined, times ten. He wasn't even embarrassed.

"Oh Monica, I can feel it!" Phoebe added. "Ooh this is so exciting! I remember when the triplets started kicking. Pretty soon it's gonna be, like, nonstop and you'll never get a moment of peace and, oh, just wait until it gets big enough to actually stand on your bladder now _there's_ a fun time and…" she trailed off, seeing Monica's shy smile as she caressed her stomach. "And you're probably gonna enjoy every second of it, aren't you?"

Chandler would never get tired of the happy smile on Monica's face whenever she thought about their baby. The rough patches—like her breakdown early that morning—were really few and far between, especially in comparison to the pure joy and excitement that she experienced daily, and Chandler felt it too. Every time he looked at her, and she looked happy, Chandler felt his love for his girlfriend and his baby multiply by a hundred.

Monica giggled—actually _giggled_ —and Chandler almost melted on the spot. Unable to help himself any longer, he made his way to the couch with the bottles of water and lodged himself between Monica and Phoebe, before pulling his girlfriend onto his lap and wrapping his arms around her waist.

"He's still going," Chandler noticed with surprise. Now that they had felt it once, it seemed as though the kicking never stopped. "Is he supposed to be kicking that much already?"

"The hell if I know," Monica responded. "I'll call Doctor McKay later today or tomorrow just to check in, see what she says. He probably just likes the attention."

Chandler grinned and kissed the top of her shoulder, stroking gently over the bump.

"Gee, I wonder where he gets that from," he joked, protesting when Monica slapped his arm in retaliation.

"He?" Rachel cut in. "I thought you guys weren't going to find out."

Monica blushed lightly. "We didn't," she admitted. "I…well, I just kinda have a feeling that it's a boy, and Chandler is good at humoring me. So, I guess we're going with "he" until proven otherwise."

"I do think it's a boy!" Chandler added. "I don't know why, I just do!"

"Admit it, you didn't think that until I said something," Monica prodded. "It's okay, I appreciate you being so supportive."

"I'll have you know that I've thought it's a boy this entire time," he argued. Monica gave him a look. "Well, okay, maybe not the _entire_ time, but it's not just because I'm agreeing with you!" he promised. "Honest."

"Okay, honey, whatever you say," she tapped the side of his face indulgently, and he stuck his tongue out at her like the mature adult he was. Fortunately for him, she responded in the same way so he felt slightly more like it was the appropriate reaction. Obviously.

"Well I think it's a girl," Phoebe cut in. "And you know I have a gift for this."

"Yeah, I agree with Phoebe," Rachel added. "I don't know why, I just can't imagine you guys having a boy first."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Monica asked, arms going protectively around her stomach (to protect from what, Chandler had no idea).

"It doesn't mean anything Mon," Rachel assured her. "Just whenever I picture you guys actually having this baby I always picture you having a girl."

"You don't trust my mother's intuition?"

"You don't trust _my_ intuition?" Phoebe countered.

"No! You know what?" Chandler knew that Monica had that glint in her eye that she always got when she sensed a challenge.

"Baby—" he tried to cut her off.

"Fifty bucks says it's a boy," Monica threw down.

"You're on!" Phoebe replied before Chandler could get a word in to discourage the betting.

"I'll take that bet," Rachel agreed and Chandler threw his hands up.

"Why do I even bother?" he asked to no one.

"Good question," Monica answered, patting his leg as she stood up. Oh so _now_ she chooses to listen.

"Hey, where are you going? What do you need?" he sprung up after her.

"Chandler, honey, relax," she instructed him. "I'm just going to the bathroom and we're still a few weeks away from me needing help in there."

"Are you sure?" he pressed. "Can I get you anything? Are you hungry? Do you need more water?"

"Chandler, I'm fine," she replied, a note of irritation creeping into her voice. "And even if I did need something, I'm five months pregnant, I'm not an invalid. I can still do things for myself."

"I know you can, but I want to help!"

"Oh, not this again," Phoebe spoke what he knew they were all thinking. _Not this again._

"Chandler, I appreciate your help, I appreciate everything you do for me but what I really need right now is for you to let me go pee and drop this issue for now because I _don't need anything_."

"Yes dear," Chandler muttered under his breath, sinking back into the couch under the amused but slightly uncomfortable gazed of his two friends. "Not a word," he grumbled, and the two of them shared a look.

The apartment door banged open at the same moment as the toilet flushed, and Ross entered in the moment before Monica reappeared.

"Hey guys," he greeted, looking around the room. "What's up?"

"Nothing," Chandler responded at the same time Phoebe spoke up.

"They're doing it again," she informed him.

"Doing what?" Monica asked, taking her place back on Chandler's lap. "We're not doing anything."

"That fight again?" Ross clarified, completely ignoring that his sister has spoken.

"It's not a fight," Chandler argued. "It's just…two stubborn people being continuously stubborn."

"Sounds like a fight to me," Phoebe shrugged.

"We don't fight!" Monica snapped, deflating a bit when all three friends raised their eyebrows in disbelief. "We don't! We may not agree on everything all the time, and he may be a stubborn ass—"

"Oh _I'm_ the stubborn ass," Chandler grumbled; Monica ignored him.

"But that doesn't mean that we fight all the time or anything," she continued. "I mean, we spend a lot more time not fighting that we do fighting."

"Yeah, but how much of that "not fighting" time is when you're having sex? Because that doesn't count," Phoebe countered.

Chandler rolled his eyes. This was _exactly_ why they kept their relationship a secret for so long to begin with. The others just didn't _get it_. He loved Monica, and at the end of the day that was more important than any stupid argument or disagreement or, okay, fight they could ever have, wasn't it? He liked to think it was, that they could somehow defy all the forces working against them and just _make it work_. That Monica thought it was worth it enough to make it work, no matter what it took.

Monica didn't answer Phoebe's question, just grabbed Chandler's hand to place back over her stomach, seemingly a sign to their friends that everything was good between them. Chandler wasn't complaining, he would take any excuse under the sun to touch her.

The baby was still at the moment, but Chandler smiled at the memory of the soft flutter that he had already memorized, even though it had been fewer than twelve hours since he had felt it for the first time. Every day the reality hit him harder and harder: he was having a baby. He, _Chandler Bing_ , was going to be a father. His girlfriend—his girlfriend _Monica_ —was carrying a tiny human that he had helped create.

He really should be freaking out more than he was.

"Honey? Don't you need to go to work?" Monica interrupted his thoughts.

"I mean, I don't _need_ to…" he trailed off, looking around the room. Chandler sighed. "Yeah, okay." He lifted Monica off his lap just enough to put her down next to him on the couch. "Have a good day," he kissed her lightly on the cheek. "And you," he turned his attention to the bump. "Don't do anything exciting until I get back, okay?"

"Just go," Monica rolled her eyes, but she smiled at him fondly, and Chandler smiled back.

"Bye," he said one last time before standing up and making his way to the door.

"Hey, wait up man, I'll walk down with you!" Ross called before Chandler could leave the apartment. He said his goodbye to the girls before joining Chandler in the kitchen, and the two men left together.

Before Chandler could try to make conversation as they started down the stairs, Ross spoke up.

"Is everything really okay with you guys?" he asked. Chandler sighed.

"I promise, Ross, everything is great. Like, really, _really_ great."

"So have you talked any more about getting married then?"

Chandler gritted his teeth and took a breath to maintain his composure. It was far from the first time he or Monica had encountered that question from one of their friends, hell it probably wasn't even the first time that _week_ , but it never failed to grate on his nerves just how nosey everyone could be, even after both he and Monica had—he thought—made their position clear.

"Ross," Chandler began.

"I know you guys keep saying you don't want to, but really, why not?" Ross pressed.

"We're just not ready for that yet, okay?"

"Dude, you've been going out almost a year!" Ross protested. "If you ask me, that's plenty of time."

"If I ask you, six weeks is plenty of time, apparently," Chandler retorted, not caring that the Emily debacle was still probably a sensitive topic. "Besides, we're not you. I know this is a little unconventional, but we really don't want to rush anything. I want to marry her because I love her, not because I got her pregnant, and that's what she wants too."

"But you do love her," Ross reminded him. "And she loves you. And you already said you wanted to marry her, so seriously, what are you waiting for?"

"I…I don't even know," Chandler admitted. "I'm just waiting for her to say that it's okay, I guess. In case you hadn't noticed, Monica kinda calls the shots here."

"What about like…moving in together, or something?" Ross suggested. "Wouldn't that make sense anyways for when the baby comes?"

"I…guess…" Chandler contemplated the idea slowly. They had never really talked about anything like that; for some reason his brain usually seemed to jump straight from where they are now to marriage, without considering the middle ground. But Monica had never brought it up either, and Chandler was almost certain she must have thought of it. Monica thought of everything. And if she had thought of it, but didn't bring it up to him, Chandler could only believe that she didn't want to take that step yet either. Maybe he could find a way to sneak it into conversation, or…

"Dude," Ross interrupted his thoughts. "It was just an idea, you don't need to freak out."

"I'm not freaking out," Chandler argued. "I'm just…thinking. I don't know. I really don't know what's going on with us Ross."

"Just talk to Monica about it," Ross responded, hailing a cab when they reached the street. "Seriously, you guys have been together long enough, you can't just stay in this no man's land forever." Chandler slumped his shoulders; he knew Ross was right. "Think about it," he instructed, ducking into the taxi that pulled up with a wave before driving off, leaving Chandler to walk to the subway by himself.

He wanted to marry Monica. He wanted to live with Monica. He possibly wanted to have more kids with Monica (and where did _that_ come from?). Chandler had never been so sure of something as he was of his love and commitment to her.

He just wished he could be sure that she felt the same.

That was the holdup, wasn't it? If she didn't want to get married, they weren't going to get married. If she didn't want to move in together, then they wouldn't do that either. If they were going to move forward, it had to be in a way they were _both_ comfortable with.

Maybe they were due for another conversation about where they stood. So much of their time and energy and talking lately had been directed towards the baby and the pregnancy, that they hadn't just been a couple in weeks. And they hadn't _talked_ about being a couple in months.

It was definitely time to change that.

Chandler resolved to take her out somewhere, to take her on a date like they hadn't been on since before all this started. It would be good to spend some real time together, and maybe it would give him a better idea of where exactly she stood on moving forward in their relationship. Maybe she would bring it up herself and Chandler would be off the hook. At the very least, though, he would be with Monica, and at the end of the day that was all he ever wanted.

 **Reviews motivate me to write faster, so please let me know what you think! (Predictions are also welcome, because while _I've_ known since the beginning where I wanted to go, I'm very curious what you guys think I'm planning...I promise I won't spoil anything, I'm just personally curious haha) **

**Come talk to me on instagram supernatural_mondler**


	14. Chapter 13

**So I really didn't think I was gonna get this chapter posted for a long time (like 2 more weeks at the soonest) then no sooner had I made that announcement on Instagram did I somehow manage to crank out the entire chapter in like an hour (shoutout to creative writing club). This is a bit shorter than usual, but I thought it was a good place to break it off.**

 **Your reviews and messages on Instagram are the reason I'm still writing. This is by far the longest story I've ever written, and obviously I'm still going! That's all down to you guys and your amazing encouragement throughout this process, and I couldn't be more grateful! Please do keep it up, and I promise I'll try to keep pushing out content as often as I'm capable!**

"You're being quiet again," Monica observed, lifting her head from where it was rested against Chandler's chest. He had come home early from work—no one would miss him for the last hour of the day—and found the apartment completely empty save for Monica. She had worked only the lunch shift that day, and had been to work and back in the time that Chandler was gone. He had pulled her to the couch immediately upon entering, not even bothering to turn on the TV, just needing to be close to her after missing her all day.

"Shhhh," Chandler teased. "I need the quiet to think."

"No, seriously," she laughed, looking up at him. "What's up?"

"I just missed you," Chandler shrugged. "Do I need a reason to cuddle with my girlfriend?"

He didn't miss the shy smile that ghosted across her face when he referred to her as his girlfriend. It didn't matter how many times he said it, she still reacted in the same way, something that filled Chandler with happiness.

"No, but your girlfriend was about to start dinner, so unless you want to rely on _Rachel_ for food, I can't sit here all night, as much as I may want to."

"I was thinking," Chandler started. No better time, he figured. "Let's go out tonight, please? We haven't gone on a date in way too long and I miss spending time with you like that."

"Oh, Chandler," she sighed, sitting up. "I…I don't know. Shouldn't we be, like, saving our money? Or something? Or—"

"Mon," Chandler interrupted her, bringing his hand to her face to gently tip her chin up and meet her eyes again. "We haven't been on a date in forever. We've both been working so hard lately trying to get ready for the baby, we've earned a night for us. I want to spoil you. Please, just let me be your boyfriend?"

Monica's smile softened as she reached up to brush a hand through his hair.

"I would like that a lot," she grinned, and Chandler grinned back, internally sighing in relief.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," she confirmed. "So, what were you thinking? I'm gonna go get ready."

"Totally your call," Chandler responded. "Fanciest place in the city, McDonald's down the street, just tell me what you're in the mood for and I'll make it happen."

She bit her lip for a moment, not like she was thinking, but like she already had an answer but was shy about whether to say or not. Chandler didn't push, just stayed as he was, hand resting on her thigh as she debated with herself.

"I could…I could go for a burger," she admitted finally. "I know that's probably not what you had planned."

Chandler grinned. "I had nothing planned," he promised. "Burgers sound amazing. We could walk up towards Central Park, just see what we walk past?"

"That sounds amazing," she repeated, kissing his cheek before standing up. "So, casual?"

"Casual," he confirmed. "Wear whatever you want, Mon, you look amazing in everything."

"Kiss ass," Monica mocked, glancing over her shoulder before closing the bedroom door behind her.

Chandler laughed to himself, turning on the TV while he waited for her. It was a cheesy line, but he meant it completely. Monica was gorgeous. He had always thought so, and every day he was struck more and more by just how beautiful she was, especially now that she was carrying his child. Pregnancy looked really, _really_ good on her. Though it was entirely possible that Chandler was biased. He didn't really care either way.

They were out the door just over twenty minutes later, a miracle if there ever was one. Hand in hand they walked through the mild New York evening, the sun just beginning to set and cool the city. They had no destination in mind, tonight was just about spending time together, and if they did end up grabbing cheeseburgers from McDonald's, then Chandler wouldn't complain at all.

Monica, on the other hand, even pregnant, had higher standards than that. After wandering for a little while, she informed him that she knew the area, and that there was a good place just a few streets over, and that if she didn't eat soon she would die. Her words. Pregnant Monica could be a bit of a drama queen (not that he would _dream_ of saying that to her face).

The small restaurant came into view just where she said it was, and Chandler's mouth practically started watering at the delicious smells coming from inside. It really had been awhile since he'd eaten in an actual restaurant.

His hand was on the door handler, about to hold in open for Monica to enter ahead of him, when she stopped him with a hand on his arm. He turned to look at her, and noticed that she had gone pale, and without her even saying anything, Chandler knew exactly what was wrong.

"I'm sorry," she shook her head. "I just…can't right now. Burgers sounded good at the time, but…"

"Don't apologize," Chandler pulled her away from the door and away from the smell that was clearly upsetting her. "I don't care where we go, this is about you, okay? Let's just keep walking, and you let me know if you see something that sounds good."

Monica pressed closer to his side as she nodded shyly. She had no reason to feel guilty, they had all been there for this part of Phoebe's pregnancy when there was no rhyme or reason to what the baby wanted and what made it sick. Chandler certainly didn't fault her, but he knew her well enough to know that she was mentally beating herself up over something well beyond her control.

"Hey," he said quietly, stopping their progress back towards the main road. "You're doing really well, Mon. I'm so proud of you, and so thankful that our baby will have a mother as strong as you. If the hardest part about all this is trying to find somewhere you wanna eat, well, I'd say we're doing pretty well, wouldn't you?"

He smiled at her, and she gave a small smile in return, tears coming to her eyes as she rushed to hide her face. Chandler wrapped an arm around her shoulder and hers went around his waist as he leaned down to kiss her forehead.

Monica was quiet as they continued walking, eyes scanning the street for anything that sounded good to her. Chandler spent most of the journey just looking at her. Not for the first time he was hit by just how lucky he was that this incredible woman was by his side. Monica was truly the most amazing person he had met in all his life, and he wanted nothing more than to keep her by his side always.

They finally ended up at a breakfast place not far from their apartments. Chandler helped Monica into one of the booths before sliding in next to her, even just sitting across the table seeming like too great a distance. Monica rolled her eyes but didn't protest when he wrapped his arm around her again, instead snuggling closer into his touch.

After multiple reassurances that the smell wouldn't bother her, Chandler ordered scrambled eggs and bacon, while Monica ordered chocolate chip pancakes and French toast with a side of yogurt ("you're eating for two, get whatever you want," Chandler had encouraged when she admitted that pancakes may not be enough).

Once the waiter had disappeared with their orders, Monica sighed and slumped down in the booth.

"I'm sorry," she said, gaze fixed on the edge of the table. "I know this probably isn't how you wanted tonight to go, and it seems really silly to go out for a meal I could cook at home."

"Monica," Chandler interrupted before she could get too worked up. "All I wanted for tonight was to spend some time with my girlfriend without interruption from the vultures, where we could relax and just be _us_ for a little while. As long as I'm with you, that's good enough for me."

Monica ducked her head to hide her blush, and Chandler grinned at the thrill of causing that reaction in her.

"Our baby is so lucky to have you for a daddy, too, you know," Monica spoke up just when Chandler thought she would drop it altogether. "You're…you're so patient, and sweet, and caring, and you're just so much more than you give yourself credit for. I wouldn't want to do this with anyone else."

Now it was Chandler's turn to pause, still not used to such high praise, especially from a girlfriend. From his own perspective, he was a mess. A sarcastic, immature, annoying disaster who couldn't keep a girlfriend to save his life because someone better _always_ came along. But with Monica…he could almost see where she was coming from. She made him want to be a better person, both for her and for the baby.

"I wouldn't want you to do this with anyone else," he admitted finally. "I…I love that I'm the one who gets to take care of you."

"You don't need to take care of me," Monica protested weakly, but Chandler just let her interruption blow over him, all too used to the debate by now and knowing that now was not the time to start up again.

"And," he continued. "I love knowing that in a few months we're going to have a family to raise together. Mon, I love you so much, and I just know that all this is right. I haven't been scared in months, and it's all because of you."

"Chandler…"

"No, let me," Chandler cut in before she could interrupt. "I know you keep saying that there's no rush to get married, and there isn't, but I _want to_ , Mon. I want to marry you. So whenever you're ready, I am too."

He hadn't meant to bring it up like that, he hadn't, but once he had started talking he couldn't stop. Apparently the conversation with Ross had been on his mind more prominently than he had thought. And maybe it was for the best because it had been months since they had seriously talked about their future in any way that didn't have to do with the baby, and he knew they could only go so long in this no-man's land they had been living in since Monica announced she was pregnant.

But Monica wasn't saying anything, wasn't even looking at him. Instead, she had stiffened in his arms and Chandler's heart sunk as she started to pull away.

"Gotta pee," she mumbled, and he stood up in a daze to let her out of the booth. She avoided his gaze as she shuffled past, and Chandler's heart broke even further. _Of course she doesn't want to marry you, you idiot_ , he scolded himself. _Needy and desperate isn't a good look on anyone_. He flopped back down in his seat, deflated, and rested his elbows on the table to bury his head in his hands.

The evening had started off so promising. They hadn't argued, he'd gotten to take her out and just be her _boyfriend_ in the way he had craved for so long. And now? Now she was hiding in the bathroom because he had to go and open his stupid mouth. He needed to apologize, of course, to assure her that it wasn't a big deal, that they could forget about marriage completely if she wanted. They had something more important to focus on, after all. They needed to stay on good terms for their baby, whether they were married or not.

Suddenly a thought hit Chandler that really hadn't been there before. What if she _never_ wants to marry him? What if the only reason she's even with him still is because they're having a baby, and as soon as she meets someone better, she'll kick him to the curb? She had just said she didn't want to do this with anyone else, but was that just because she felt comfortable with Chandler-her-best-friend, and had no intention of ever moving their relationship forward?

Chandler knew that didn't sound like Monica, but really, very little about how their relationship had evolved—or not evolved—over the past few months was what he would have expected of her. Himself, maybe, but he knew he wasn't the holdup here. He had made that clear.

 _And probably scared her off and ruined everything in the process_ , the unhelpful part of his brain added. He just needed to see her, to hear her assure him that he hadn't completely scared her off. He didn't need her to marry him now. He just couldn't lose her, not yet. So he just waited for her there, head in hand.

It was a long time before Monica came back.

 **Did I mention that angst was back? No? Well, there you go. I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, please let me know in the reviews here, or on Instagram (I promise I'm nice, don't be afraid to message me!)**

 **Full disclosure: final exams are about to start. There's a good chance that I won't even _touch_ this story for another two weeks, much less have enough written to post. As soon as I'm done with classes, though, I intend to crank out another chapter as quickly as I can!**


	15. Chapter 14

***peeks out from behind the bushes* hi remember me? I never intended to leave this story for so long, but I just cannot and will not publish anything I'm unhappy with, and as anyone who follows me on instagram knows, I was going through a major case of writer's block for a long time, then I kinda left the fandom. While this chapter is very short, and doesn't even come close to making up for my long absence with this fic, I hope you all (if there's even anyone still reading) enjoy it.**

"Hey, you're up early," Joey noted, stretching as he emerged from his room the next morning. Chandler sighed into his coffee cup and hung his head.

"Yeah, I guess I couldn't sleep," Chandler shrugged.

"You okay man?" Joey asked, obviously catching on to his roommate's demeanor.

"Umm…" Chandler wasn't entirely sure how to answer. No, he wasn't really okay, but he didn't know why he wasn't okay. Monica had eventually come back to the table last night, and they had finished the meal in slightly awkward silence. He hadn't pushed her to talk to him, still stinging from her rejection, and she hadn't seemed too eager to start a conversation either so they just…didn't. It had been years since Chandler had felt that uncomfortable around Monica and he was struggling with how to deal with it.

They had walked straight home, rather than casually wandering as they had on the way there, and after Monica had quietly announced that she was tired, they had gone straight to bed. He really had no idea what was going on in Monica's mind through all of this, and he wanted nothing more than to ask. But he didn't. He just climbed into bed next to her and tried not to let it affect him when she turned her back to him to fall asleep.

Chandler himself got very little sleep, hence why he was on his third cup of coffee already when he saw Joey, and while theoretically that should be more than ample to deal with his roommate's questioning, he didn't want to talk to _anyone_ until he talked with Monica. Whenever that happened.

"Where's Monica?" Joey pressed, and Chandler realized that he hadn't said anything for some time.

"Still asleep, I think," Chandler shrugged. "Or across the hall making breakfast? I don't know, she was sleeping when I got up."

"What are you doing over here then? The only time you two are ever apart is when one of you has to work."

"We…kinda had a…thing, last night," Chandler responded vaguely, taking a sip as casually as he could.

"A _thing_?" Joey clarified. "Like, a _fight_ thing?"

"No, not a fight," Chandler argued. "It was more…I said something stupid, and…you know what, it doesn't matter."

"Really? 'Cause it seems like it matters a lot for you to spend the morning moping over here instead of doing whatever it is you two do in the mornings."

Joey had a point, of course, and Chandler doubted he would get off so easily without _some_ sort of explanation.

He was saved from going any further, though, when the apartment door cracked open a moment before Chandler felt arms around his waist. He sunk into the embrace immediately, any anguish he had been feeling about the previous night's not-fight all but gone at the easy display of affection and the glorious sensation of his child pressed against his back.

"Morning handsome," she greeted, softly kissing the side of his neck, and Chandler turned to say good morning properly.

"Hey you," he responded, meeting her lips for a quick kiss. It was so casual, as if nothing had happened between them. Chandler was more than okay with just putting the incident behind them if that was what Monica wanted to do.

"I made breakfast if you guys wanna come over," Monica told them.

"Why didn't you lead with that?" Joey exclaimed, the door opening and closing not a moment later as he went off in search of food.

Chandler held Monica close for a minute, just enjoying the feeling of having her in his arms again. Even though he had technically slept next to her last night, it was nothing like sharing the closeness of their bodies pressed together.

"I'm sorry," he finally mumbled into her hair. "If I made you uncomfortable yesterday. You know I only want to make you happy."

"Forget it, Chandler, we're good," she assured him. "I promise, everything is fine. Now, we should probably get back over there before Joey eats all the pancakes—and the batter I haven't cooked yet."

Chandler ran his hands down her back and sides to press them lightly against her stomach before drawing back completely with a small smile. When he really thought about it, that was what it was all for. He was going to have a baby with Monica, and anything else was just background noise. His sole focus needed to be making sure their kid would have the best life they could give it.

Chandler followed his girlfriend across the hall where Joey was already indulging in what appeared to be his second helping of pancakes. Monica's batter, however, seemed safe for the moment as she reclaimed her spot at the stove to continue cooking. Rachel joined them for breakfast eventually before excusing herself to meet Phoebe to go shopping. Joey left eventually too and they were alone again. Chandler was unsure how to start a conversation, worried about accidentally bringing up something she didn't want to talk about. He couldn't have a repeat of the previous night.

"Y'know," she started casually after they had been alone for barely a minute. "We still haven't talked about names."

"Okay, so let's talk about names," Chandler shrugged. "You go."

"Why do I have to go?" Monica raised an eyebrow, crossing her arms over her front.

"Because you brought it up, and you're the mother, and you're Monica, and—"

"Okay, fine!" Monica huffed. "I haven't…I haven't thought about it too much…"

"And Chandler is _off_ the table, Mon, just so we're clear," Chandler interrupted.

""But—"

"I mean it!"

Monica rolled her eyes. "Okay, whatever. I wasn't _actually_ going to suggest Chandler. And I really haven't thought about it too much, at least not lately." She shook her head, smiling shyly downwards. "It's funny, I used to dream about this all the time, having a baby. I had names picked out by the time I was twelve. But now—now that it _means_ something…"

"I know," Chandler interrupted. "I know. We have time, Mon, we really don't have to do this now."

"Shouldn't we though?" Monica argued. "Shouldn't we have, I don't know, a list or something? At least of possibilities?"

"It would make you feel better to have a list," Chandler observed. "We can do whatever you want to honey. They don't even have to be good names. Hey, we could make a list of all the names we _don't_ want!"

"Are you serious?"

"Why not?" Chandler shrugged. He turned around to grab a notepad from the counter, one of many that Monica kept lying around the apartment, probably for occasions such as this. Or, maybe not occasions like _this_ , but generally. "We've even got the first name to put at the top."

"And put Monica down after it," she instructed. Chandler raised his eyebrows at her. "What? That would be weird, naming my own baby after myself. It's not even an option."

"Do we want to rule out the rest of the guys' names?" Chandler asked as he scribbled down their first two names for the "bad names" list. "'Cause I imagine the trouble we'd get in for picking any of them over the others would outweigh anything we actually like about the name."

"Good idea," Monica agreed. "What else?"

"Well, we should probably eliminate the names of any ex-boyfriends and girlfriends."

"You mean you don't want a daughter named Janice?" Monica teased, and Chandler physically shuddered.

"Dear god no," he quickly added that to their list, along with Kathy, Richard, and Pete.

"We've both dated more people than that," Monica reminded him.

"Well, we can rule those names out when they come up. But these are the ones _way_ out of the question. What else?" Monica sat thinking for a moment. "Come on, Mon, use your imagination. Anything at all. Any name you would _hate_ our kid to have."

"Hmmm…Angus," she said finally, and Chandler laughed. "What? There's literally no way to spin that into a good name!"

"I'm not disagreeing with you!" Chandler said defensively as he wrote it down. "I just…wasn't expecting that. I don't know."

"Your turn," Monica instructed.

"We don't have to actually take turns, Mon—"

"Chandler!"

"Okay, okay!" Chandler surrendered. "Ummm…what about Gertrude?"

"Ugh, yes, put that on the list. Wilson."

"Duke."

"Annabelle."

"Lars."

"Flo."

"Flo? Is that even something people actually name their kids?"

"Well, we're definitely not," Monica stated.

"No argument there," Chandler agreed. "How about Nelson?"

"Good. Moe?"

"Done. Dawn?"

"Hmmm…yeah take it off. This is kind of fun actually."

"Isn't it though? You're turn."

"Maureen."

"Marshall."

"Gwen."

They continued back and forth like this for a while. Chandler was surprised when they ran out of room on the page, and went to flip to a clean sheet when Monica stopped him.

"I think that's good for now," she said.

"You sure?"

"Yeah," she smiled. She stood up and walked around the table to sit on his lap, and Chandler instinctively wrapped his arms around her to keep her in place. "Thank you."

"Don't mention it," he brushed her off. "Like you said, it was fun."

"No, I mean thank you for everything. Thank you for thinking of it, thank you for knowing exactly what I need, thank you for being so patient with me, just…thank you."

"I love you," Chandler replied. "All that other stuff? Kinda comes with the territory."

"I love you too," Monica said. "I feel like I haven't said it enough recently, but I do. So, so much."

"You've kinda had other things to worry about," Chandler poked at her stomach, making her giggle. "You don't have to say it for me to know it's true, okay? I get it."

"I love you," she repeated, and Chandler kissed her temple in response. "No matter what other stupid things I say, or you say, I love you."

"I know," he said. "I know."

 **I decided to change my writing approach to this fic a bit, and that's making it a bit easier to write. At one point I had a very detailed plan of everything that I wanted to happen, in the order I wanted it to happen, and while at first that helped to keep me on track and productive, it eventually became limiting, so I've decided to abandon that a bit. Hopefully that means I'll continue to update from time to time, now that I more or less have my writing mojo back. That being said, as you can see from my profile I'm in the middle of two other fics at the moment, in addition to participating in a Post-Ep challenge for The West Wing. Updating those will continue to be my top priority, so updates here might be slow going. But, with any luck, they will continue to come. Writing for The West Wing has, for whatever reason, gotten me back in the groove of writing. As luck would have it, writing Chandler is very similar to writing Josh (from TWW), so the more comfortable I've become writing him, the more I've been able to relocate Chandler's voice.**

 **Anyways, after that essay of an A/N that literally no one asked for, THANK YOU to everyone still sticking with this story! You guys are the reason I haven't given up yet, and why I'll try my hardest to see it through to the end. Reviews are beyond appreciated, so please let me know what you think!**


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